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She confesses what now


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Hi all. Im new to this forum and came across it at about 04:00am this morning after my wife of 7 years confessed to having a fling with a co-worker (Actually, her boss).

 

for a bit of history,... I started a new business about 3 years ago. as with any new business (especially during the latest global recession), most entrepneurs find that they would be working 20 hour days / 7 days a week. this obviously caused serious problems in our marriage initially and after some counselling and openess with one another, we worked through our issues and my wife truely became a women with an immense amount of understanding to my long days. to give back, I made commitments to never work on weekends but could work at times through the night during the week... this way I could always give my family some much required TLC and at the same time give the necessary time to my business.

 

In fairness, she has been great. over the last year, she started studying again as she is an ambitious women and a little career driven after having two children, she wanted to contribute more to the household instead of me working to the bone to bring in the money. during her classes and studying, I would assume the sole house-keeper and child carer role and put my work on the back-burner a bit. to be honest, it was the best thing that could ever have happened.. i found that I was more involved with my 2 beautiful children and actually started to having meaningful conversations with them about their day and so forth. Everything was humming along nicely... occassionally, my wife would moan a bit about me working too much and I would make a concious decision to stop what i was doing and spend some time just chatting with her.

To my surprise, yesterday she receives a call from her boss's wife... we are both a bit perplexed about it but nothing suspicous. the wife pitches up at our house and my wife hops into the car and chats for an hour... she then comes in the house and says "I have something to tell you... I haven't been entirely honest with you...".

she then tells me that she has been flirting with her boss for the last 6 months and his wife suspects that they are having an affair. very taken aback about this "sudden" pounce of confessions.. i almost turn to her to say that has the OM's W lost her marbles... i just simply can not believe it. the OM W then tells me that emails suggest that they were having sexually orrientated email corrospondence and that they had kissed... my wife admits to this and also admits that the flirting has actually been going on for 2 years but no sexual encounters have taken place. she tells me that the kissing incident happend over 12 months ago and that her boss had initiated it and she briefly responded but pulled away.

She goes further to say that at that time (which would be around the time that we were having problems in our marriage) she felt deserted and depressed and her boss had offered a lending ear and her Boss was also experiencing marriage problems and so they supported one another by listening to each other... even though she insists that nothing physical has happened since that time, she still txt or emailed suggestively but supposedly never went further than that.

to be fair to her boss, I know him well enough to now that he is actually a good man.

after talking almost through the night, my wife definitley seems to be sincere when she says that she is extremely regrettful over everything and wishes to make things work between us.

 

I dont know if i can trust her and as the hours tick by, I become more and more resentful over what has happened. I just feel that perhaps we need some time apart... perhaps i move out but remain at home unitl the kids go to bed at night and be here prior to them waking so that they dont have any suspicions... just until I can make a decision on what to do next...

 

Is this the entirely wrong way to go about this or should I stay in the home and try work things out. Im concerned that by staying in the house, I will not get the "me time" to try analyze everything and make a non-pressured decision on how to move forward.

 

Anyone with some suggestions on your own or similar experiences would be very much appreciated.

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whichwayisup

I want to reply to you, so please copy and paste your story in the infidelity section. That's where betrayed spouses post their stories.. You'll get more responses over there.

This section is for OW/OM.

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