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I am getting a divorce and I am falling in love with a married man. I need some light


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[font=times new roman][/font][color=blue][/color]OK guys here is the deal. I have been married for 6 years. it has been an absolute mess since day one. So we have decided to call it quites. Life is to short to be unhappy everyday. Now for the last year and a half I have had my eye on the guy at work. We are both Truck drivers. We have been flirting back and forth. The desire is so thick between us you could cut it with a knife. He is has been married for 25 years. He has worked at the same place for 20 years. He is very shy and is a great person. From what I know of his wife she is very controlling and calls the shots. He has two boys that are both grown up and gone. We have taken a great interest in each other. We have kissed a couple of times. The last time we kissed he said that "He is afraid of getting hurt." Don't you think I should be thinking that. If he is afraid of getting hurt, maybe he really wants to make a go of this but is a little scared. But he still comes to me. And everyday he smiles more and more at me and comes around to talk with me every chance he gets. I would never hurt him. We have it really bad for each other. I know that there must be something wrong/missing in his marriage for him to stray. From what I know , he has never ever cheated on his wife. He married at 21 and he is now 45. I am 34. It seems to me that he really wants to get seriously involved with me. 20 years is along time to just throw out the door. So I am trying to figure out what he really needs or wants. I will except the fact that he is married ,but am I ready for a big let down? :confused:

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if he doesn't want to be with his wife why doesn't he divorce her?

you think your the first person he has kissed ?

i know truck drivers they screw around all the time.you should not go out with married men your just as bad as they are. he can get a divorce everyone does it its easy. if he doesn't then he's not going to. he can have his cake and eat it to going out of town all the time, since you are a driver yourself ,you should know all about the way they sleep around.

do unto others.

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No, You dont understand. We are not over the road truck drivers. I drive a dump truck amd he use to drive and now he is a machanic. He spends 6 days a week, 12-13 hours a day at work. He has one day off a week. And yes I think I am the only one he has ever kissed except for his wife. Since he has been married. He doesnt go out on the town at all. He is so different from many other men I have known. He is a shy person. I am the one who has made all the advances towards him. Believe me, I know all about the over the road truckers. This senerio is very different from that. He married at a young age. Never really dated anyone and he has been with the same woman ever since. I asked him why he was interested in me? He said that he couldn't stand seeing me be mistreated and unhappy. So how am I suppose to take that? I suppose I should dig around a little and find out what he intends to do in the future. I asked him to please spare my feelings if this was a game to him. He said it is no game. 95% of the time these things don't go anywhere. Maybe I might actually be one of the 5% that will be different.

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he still should get a divorce if he wants to be with you, men have affairs and figure if it doesn't work out he'll stay with his wife, if you want to ruin lives go ahead. like another member said in the forum some wives might just kill you or HIm'm . so it better be worth it. and dam I'm tired of hearing about how the poor man is unhappy most of the Time me thats a line of bull to get you in bed.

oh i forgot hes shy.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Don't believe him. If he was unhappy he woul;d leave. When he doesn't leave it's because he doesn't want to. A man will tell you ANYTHING if he thinks for one second you will give him what he wants.

 

If you really want to know. Tell him you want to cut contact because your feelings are getting to strong and you don't want to be involved with a married man. Tell him you are sorry but it's the right thing to do. Then stick to it If he's got it for you like you believe he does then he will leave. Otherwise it was just a failed attempt to keep his comfy old shoes and get a new pair to wear when it's convienent for him. Plus if you give him whatr he wants why would he leave he'll have her and you. Don't do it I am speaking from experience.

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  • 1 year later...

I know this is an old post, but I hope you can just walk away. Having been the victim of an unfaithful husband, nobody wins. It's just a bad situation for everyone involved.

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