How Many OW spent Valentine's Day with MM?

[stillafool]

Just curious OW. How many of you spent Valentine's Day and night with your MM?

[OWoman]

Just curious OW. How many of you spent Valentine's Day and night with your MM?

 

The whole, long, steamy weekend

 

Last year, too

[NoIDidn't]

The whole, long, steamy weekend

 

Last year, too

 

 

Again, you are not an OW. Why do you continue to identify as one?

 

Just imagine a poster that EVER once admitted betrayal doing this. They would be flamed for "bragging" or "boasting" about their marriage.

 

So strange to me, this is. That a now-W would bemoan society's labeling her forever as OW, but would turn around an revel in it. There is a name for this attempt to have it both ways.

 

Sorry for the TJ, stillafool.

 

I spent the day with my MM (Husband, as in OWoman's case too, mind you) in bed....sleeping. Exhausted from performing the night before. We got a sitter just so we could SLEEP!

[OWoman]

 

Again, you are not an OW. Why do you continue to identify as one?

 

Just imagine a poster that EVER once admitted betrayal doing this. They would be flamed for "bragging" or "boasting" about their marriage.

 

So strange to me, this is. That a now-W would bemoan society's labeling her forever as OW, but would turn around an revel in it. There is a name for this attempt to have it both ways.

 

 

I don't bemoan society's labelling of me as an OW. Frankly, I've never heeded any labelling, so it would worry me not an iota!

 

My point was simply that we did spend VDay together, as we had before (before we were M, when I WAS the OW). It was not unusual for us. Not every OW spends VDay locked in some darkened room, sobbing into her pillow as she imagines the roses and champagne between the MM and his W. Sometimes she's the one getting the roses and the champagne.

 

As are all different. OWs are all different. Stereotypes are not helpful and I'm not going to try to conform to one just to make someone else's prejudice easier for them.

[Brokenlady]

Just curious OW. How many of you spent Valentine's Day and night with your MM?

 

Never happened while we were in the A. There were years we spent some time together, but it was only stolen moments. Last year was awful, and he spent the day with his xW (because it was too "cruel" to leave her alone), and this year we aren't together by my choice. I know his xW goes out of town every year (used to go with him), so I think he was alone. Part of me sort of revels in the idea that maybe now he knows what it feels like. But of course, he doesn't have to torture himself thinking I am happy with someone else like I did. Guess I'm still pretty pissed, huh?

[Lizzie60]

I had messages (phone), some emails... one asked to come over.. I refused as I had plans to be with my little ones... ..

 

My MMs DO NOT come before my grandkids..

[bittersweet memories]

The whole, long, steamy weekend

 

Last year, too

 

 

Aren't you married to one now? So that doesn't count...

[MizFit]

I haven't seen MM since he's made contact again so I went on with my plans to spend the day with a friend and her baby. Had a great time...lunch and shopping. I had a beautiful message on Facebook from him...spoke to my nephew...it was a lovely day.

 

I don't really rate it as much of a holiday anyway...I think it's quite cruel actually...so it's best to just spend the time with anyone you love in whatever capacity, and I did.

[Lizzie60]

I'd be curious as to how many Ws spent VD with their H...

 

For some people VD is just like any other day of the year...

[jennie-jennie]

We live too far apart to be able to spend Valentine's day together, but I got a wonderful bouquet of flowers with a handwritten card that said:

 

Hello Darling! I love you always! I am far away I know but my heart is next to you! :love:

[GreenEyedLady]

I'd be curious as to how many Ws spent VD with their H...

 

For some people VD is just like any other day of the year...

 

I guess I'm allowed to answer this one?

 

I spent Valentine's Day with my husband, our blended family of five children, including the older one's boyfriend and one of their cousins.

 

My H B-B-Q'd steaks for us and chicken skewers and we had baked potatoes, broccoli, and garlic cheese bread. For dessert we had brownie sundaes, taught the kids to play Scrabble and it was a great night! Still managed to squeeze in a little "nookie" too!

 

(We had "our" Valentine's Day Celebration on Friday night without the kids.)

 

GEL

[BlueeyedJonesy]

I spent the weekend with H. Friday night was our date night and that was really nice...on sunday I made a nice dinner and we had dessert once the kiddos went to bed:love:

 

To us...Valentines day is just a day to remind us all how much we love eachother. IF you really need a designated day to tell someone you love them..then I think thats wrong. Anniversaries are for gifts so we don't ever exchange gifts...just cards and time spent together.

[crazycatlady]

I try every year to tell him no flowers. Roses are outrageously expensive and while yes they are pretty, I just don't think the are worth the money for how long they last. Well this year he listened and I must say, I was just a little disappointed. Which is stupid but there ya go. He went on to say he wasn't giving me anything this year because he's going to give me money to take on my vacation with my sisters. Which is where I would rather get the money.

 

I froze my butt off grilling steaks for our dinner, but it was worth it because he ate every bite of it.

 

CCL

[GreenEyedLady]

Anniversaries are for gifts so we don't ever exchange gifts...just cards and time spent together.

 

I don't designate one day for gifts, either.

 

Valentine's Day is a day to celebrate all the different types of love and everyone got a prize (our guests were surprised they were included). I am a giver and that is one of the ways that I show I care.

 

GEL

[NoIDidn't]

My point was simply that we did spend VDay together, as we had before (before we were M, when I WAS the OW). It was not unusual for us. Not every OW spends VDay locked in some darkened room, sobbing into her pillow as she imagines the roses and champagne between the MM and his W. Sometimes she's the one getting the roses and the champagne.

 

As are all different. OWs are all different. Stereotypes are not helpful and I'm not going to try to conform to one just to make someone else's prejudice easier for them.

 

I wish I knew what stereotype you seem to be accusing me of applying here. It was not me that even mentioned what an OW might be doing on VDay. It was you.

 

This thread asked about OW spending Valentine's Day with MM, not about Ws and Hs no matter how we might try to twist it to fit.

 

That was my point.

 

Are you a W or an OW? Can't be both, can we?

[OWoman]

I wish I knew what stereotype you seem to be accusing me of applying here.

 

NID, I wasn't accusing YOU of anything.

 

I WAS an OW, and my post referenced both that time and now. I used to spend VDay with my fMM, and I still do, so M hasn't changed anything for us in that regard. A simple point, I thought.

 

I noticed you haven't lambasted any of the other non-OW who've replied on this thread - should I take that personally?

 

(And, I thought it was possible to be a W and an OW - there have been several MOWs on this site?)

[OWoman]

I'd be curious as to how many Ws spent VD with their H...

 

For some people VD is just like any other day of the year...

 

Yep, that's me. For us, every day is like VDay

[stillafool]

I spent a lovely VD with my hubby. Flowers, candy and champagne for me. I made him a wonderful dinner and it was quite romantic. It was a great day and night.

[NoIDidn't]

NID, I wasn't accusing YOU of anything.

 

Oh. Okay. It was the whole "making their prejudice easier" part of your comment that seemed to be aimed at my post.

 

I WAS an OW, and my post referenced both that time and now. I used to spend VDay with my fMM, and I still do, so M hasn't changed anything for us in that regard. A simple point, I thought.

 

More fancy footwork with the wording. I'm impressed. Considering this thread was started in 2010, I would think she was asking about this year, not last year. I thought that was a pretty simple point too.

 

I noticed you haven't lambasted any of the other non-OW who've replied on this thread - should I take that personally?

 

Of course, not. Why would you take anything personal on a message board from a poster that doesn't personally know you? I take it, that like you, they misunderstood the purpose of this thread. I thought it was for OW and MM that they are not married to.

 

(And, I thought it was possible to be a W and an OW - there have been several MOWs on this site?)

 

LOL. Thanks for this. You are absolutely right. Are you now admitting to being a MOW currently? Say it ain't so.

 

(Seriously, we need to stop TJ-ing this thread. My apologies to the OP. I will not continue in this thread in this vein. I promise! Its been real, OW. I do love the semantic twists.)

[Confused4Now]

I'm the OM and I did spend a nice picnic with my MW:love:. Weather was nice and everything. BTW I also had a nice Valentines with my 14 year old daughter too. and I was nice to my exwife:sick:. So all the women in my life had a part of Valentines with me....

[Confused4Now]

How did your MW manage to get away for a picnic?

 

I guess her H didn't mind not spending the day with her?

Funny you ask....my ex wife asked me that same question:confused:. Maybe you should do some research and read my story. You'd know it wasn't so hard to meet with her.

[torranceshipman]

Flowers, champagne, bubble bath, lingerie, a night out at a great music performance and dinner at a beautiful restaurant, most of the day in bed...then a 2nd dinner out at a really beautiful place then next day...I was spoiled

[skylarblue]

Just curious OW. How many of you spent Valentine's Day and night with your MM?

 

Gosh, I’d never spent any day and night with MM let alone Valentine’s Day. Technically, I did get to see him since it was after midnight, but only for a couple of hours. We both surprised each other with gifts (we never have before). I told him I wouldn’t dare try to call him later that day which he laughed at (not sure if that meant anything), but he sent me roses and left me a whispered (meaning W is around) voicemail saying Happy Valentine’s and called me twice again later. He said he didn’t do anything special with his W, and he wanted to work so he could see me later, but she was adamant about him staying home even though they had nothing planned.

[notsleepy]

Just curious OW. How many of you spent Valentine's Day and night with your MM?

 

Last year we spent the day together, and went out with friends for dinner and dancing. We spent the night together.

 

This year, he had a head cold and I had the flu, so we opted to celebrate later on this month when we are both feeling better. Our friends were disappointed, but we made plans for next year as a raincheck.

[fooled once]

Valentines Day for ME is the day I went into labor -- this year, no different. Today, my son turns 21

 

So my V day was spent with my H, just like it has been every year for the last 12 years. It is just another day for us. We spend the year reminding each other how much we love each other. We don't need a hallmark holiday for that.