Charlemagne Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 (edited) Hi guys! How do you cope with getting rid of thinking about the MM OR MW who you love with someone else? It's a pain in the ass.. I HATE IT! I'm waiting for my lady to divorce her husband but this must last.. At the same time I'm suffering. What can I do? ;/ Edited January 4, 2010 by Charlemagne Link to post Share on other sites
willowfields Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 I don't really have any advice, I just wanted to add that I think that is the most painful part of an affair. Link to post Share on other sites
Hazyhead Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 Hi guys! How do you cope with getting rid of thinking about the MM OR MW who you love with someone else? It's a pain in the ass.. I HATE IT! I'm waiting for my lady to divorce her husband but this must last.. At the same time I'm suffering. What can I do? ;/ If that bothers you, as it does a lot of people involved in an affair, then there's not a whole lot you can do about it whilst she's still in the marriage. Maybe learn to focus your thoughts, distract yourself with something. With an affair comes bad thinking Im afraid. Link to post Share on other sites
fooled once Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Start dating. She may never get a divorce and you are wasting your life waiting for something that might never happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Always A Lesson Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 My (MM) separated guy walked around like he was single, told me we would marry me when the divorce is done, Found out he never filed, he said " Oh I thought I did-gave the lawyer $ for something". I have learned the hard way..... and I'm a wise, smart, intelligent, sexy lady.... DON"T GET INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE WHO IS... MARRIED, OR SEPARATED.. U R ASKING FOR TROUBLE Think about it !!!! (as much as you love them) HOW DO YOU BUILD HAPPINESS ON SOMEONE ELSE'S PAIN AND SUFFERING? It's very hard once UR on the inside and involved. But Keep one eye opened...keep your ears open, really listen to what they say. They make the home seem like it's hell, but really its not, another form of manipulation. Mm/MW are : 1. Confused beyond belief 2. SELFISH-self-absorbed ind. 3. Will cheat on spouse, will cheat on you 4. Habitual liars 5. No MOral character How can you build a life on this?????? Link to post Share on other sites
tiredofit Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 [quote=DON"T GET INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE WHO IS... MARRIED, OR SEPARATED.. U R ASKING FOR TROUBLE Think about it !!!! (as much as you love them) HOW DO YOU BUILD HAPPINESS ON SOMEONE ELSE'S PAIN AND SUFFERING? It's very hard once UR on the inside and involved. But Keep one eye opened...keep your ears open, really listen to what they say. They make the home seem like it's hell, but really its not, another form of manipulation. Mm/MW are : 1. Confused beyond belief 2. SELFISH-self-absorbed ind. 3. Will cheat on spouse, will cheat on you 4. Habitual liars 5. No MOral character How can you build a life on this?????? Second All of the above. Ended my A with MW 2 weeks ago. Finding this site woke me up. I'm just lucky it didn't last as long as many others I read about on here. I'm still dealing with the fact that this person I had such strong feelings for fit in to this . Dealing with my own guilt too. It does take 2 and won't deny my lack of good judgment getting involved. I also can't deny , even knowing that everything quoted above is true, I still have incredibly strong feelings for her. Day 5 of NC and thought I about her all day. Don't wait for her Charlemagne . Get out , date , whatever, . But don't count on that divorce ever happening. Link to post Share on other sites
tiredofit Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 how the hell do you guys do the quote boxes/ kind of new here as far as posting:rolleyes: Link to post Share on other sites
Heather1 Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 I completely block it out, our time together is our time together. Last year though, I was kind of paralyzed thinking about them and their really active social life. Since then, I keep REALLY busy!! If you're jealous, an A is not for you!! If it makes you feel any better though, my time w/ my H I'm thinking about OM non-stop. Believe me, she'd rather be with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Charlemagne Posted January 5, 2010 Author Share Posted January 5, 2010 Thank you all for the answers! She is a little girl (21 yo) and this marriage was I think just a mistake she's made. Now she realized that and wants to be with me. I trust her. But.. She is very confused, because she will change her life forever and disappoint at the same time the whole bunch of friends and relatives. She doesn't know anyone in my city, and is scared to make a bounce. How could I be more supportive? I can't hug her, kiss her, anything. She is with him all the time, and he can do whatever it takes to keep her. I know that they have sex, they live together, and spend a lot of time with each other. I don't have this pleasure and I'm very worried because I feel powerless. He's in much better position than me, and I'm anxious about it. She wants to be with me, and then bang, she need to consider things, then one more time she wants to be with me, and again she needs to consider something.. How can I make her believe..? Probably after sex she is feeling closer to him, and since I'm away from her this makes him more valuable.. I hate it Start dating. her answer - would you like to hurt me? Make things even worse? You say you love me, how could you do this to me? Link to post Share on other sites
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