Thrown under the bus...it's over

[Confused4Now]

Can't really type I'm still shaking from being pissed off. Tonight everything came out with MW's H and my MW threw me under the bus. She said it as over and the husband called me threatening me to leave her alone. Wow I'm just blown away....oh well another statistic.

[bentnotbroken]

Can't really type I'm still shaking from being pissed off. Tonight everything came out with MW's H and my MW threw me under the bus. She said it as over and the husband called me threatening me to leave her alone. Wow I'm just blown away....oh well another statistic.

 

 

As it should be.

[RecordProducer]

She'll call you tomorrow and everything will be as before.

Sorry for your pain.

[Woggle]

Did you expect different?

[whichwayisup]

I know you probably don't want to hear this, but if you go back and read all your previous posts, the writing was on the wall the whole time. She never had any real intention of leaving her marriage to be with you. Sure, she probably cares alot, maybe even loves you, but it wasn't enough for her to change her whole life and give up what she has now.

 

Sorry that you're hurting..Though the positive is, you're free now to heal and let go. And eventually you'll find a (single) woman who will love and adore ONLY you.

[Confused4Now]

I know you probably don't want to hear this, but if you go back and read all your previous posts, the writing was on the wall the whole time. She never had any real intention of leaving her marriage to be with you. Sure, she probably cares alot, maybe even loves you, but it wasn't enough for her to change her whole life and give up what she has now.

 

Sorry that you're hurting..Though the positive is, you're free now to heal and let go. And eventually you'll find a (single) woman who will love and adore ONLY you.

 

As I've read many stories here on LS. You could see a lot of the signs things weren't going to work out. Like a idiot I saw all the signs in my story but refused to believe it could ever happen to me. I guess living the fantasy/dream? Yes you are right as I kept pushing her for a date and the red flags kept waving at me. All I know is when I was talking to her she looked like someone trying to protect her home and I was the devil. The look in her eyes I will never forget. She truly threw me under the bus.

 

You are right and now it will be time to heal and move on. Sad how my gut has never been wrong and I refused to listen to it and that was before I found LS. SAD!!!

[whichwayisup]

All I know is when I was talking to her she looked like someone trying to protect her home and I was the devil. The look in her eyes I will never forget. She truly threw me under the bus.

 

Because of this, stick to NC. Even if she tries to contact you for whatever reason.

[Confused4Now]

Because of this, stick to NC. Even if she tries to contact you for whatever reason.

 

Two posts that says she's going to contact me....I highly doubt she will... this was the one thing I truly wanted to fix in my life was stopping on the lying maybe that is why I might have forced her hand. This is the reason I left my marriage it was not fair to my wife. Maybe it was time for me how knows?

 

I will not contact her for any reason...I'm glad this happened...cause I truly wanted to start 2009 better than how 2008 started. I will need lots of hugs....today

[Spinning Head]

((Confused4Now))

 

You are in my thoughts and you are not alone in your pain.

[Shannon2008]

Sorry for your pain...it's hard to accept how they can change their behavior towards you in an instant...it just proves that she was deceiving you the whole time. I know you feel miserable right now...but try to look at it from a different angle....you're free from her now.

Do not contact her when this blows over, cut yourself off from her. Basically "disappear" from her life...it is the ONLY way you will start to heal from the pain. I've been where you are and no contact is the only thing that will work.

Cry, cry, cry...let yourself grieve...eventually, you'll have no more tears to shed for her.....and that's when you'll be on your way....one small step at a time....

[jwi71]

1) Be careful. You were threatened by the BS. Does he have the capacity to do you bodily injury? Is it a real threat or just anger?

 

2) Stay very far away because of 1 above and it will only serve to hurt you.

 

3) She WILL try and contact you. Do NOT respond in any way, shape or form.

 

Good luck.

[Agent_99]

Two posts that says she's going to contact me....I highly doubt she will... this was the one thing I truly wanted to fix in my life was stopping on the lying maybe that is why I might have forced her hand. This is the reason I left my marriage it was not fair to my wife. Maybe it was time for me how knows?

 

I will not contact her for any reason...I'm glad this happened...cause I truly wanted to start 2009 better than how 2008 started. I will need lots of hugs....today

 

After MW and I had our first D-Day I didn't think I would ever hear back from her again. It took not quite two weeks. And yes she threw me under the bus as well.

 

So be prepared, she may not try to contact you. But she might too.

 

Lots of hugs to you. This is really hard. I think several of us have been there.

 

~99

[Confused4Now]

1) Be careful. You were threatened by the BS. Does he have the capacity to do you bodily injury? Is it a real threat or just anger?

 

2) Stay very far away because of 1 above and it will only serve to hurt you.

 

3) She WILL try and contact you. Do NOT respond in any way, shape or form.

 

Good luck.

 

Yes he is very capable of bodily injury... he's every abusive and has anger issues....

I never backed down from him even told him lets getting it on if you want to tango. However since my MW did what she did ..my beef is not with H it's with her and listening to all the lies and believing the fantasy and dreams. What a joke!!!

 

I don't see her contacting me cause he's so controlling he'll be watching her like a hawk now. I'm sure she never thought this would happen. I just got so tired of the words not matching the actions.

[Reggie]

Yes he is very capable of bodily injury... he's every abusive and has anger issues....

I never backed down from him even told him lets getting it on if you want to tango. However since my MW did what she did ..my beef is not with H it's with her and listening to all the lies and believing the fantasy and dreams. What a joke!!!

 

I don't see her contacting me cause he's so controlling he'll be watching her like a hawk now. I'm sure she never thought this would happen. I just got so tired of the words not matching the actions.

 

I don't know your story. But, I glean that you cheated on your wife and were a particpant in hurting another man and his family. You say your issue is with her and her lying. But, shouldn't your real issue be with yourself? I mean you were lying , as well. You seemed oblivious to the pain you were causing anothe himan being, her husband, as well as the pain you must have inflicted on your wife.

I'd say you need counseling to try to find out how you got this way and whehter there is some way to fix yourself.

It's very hard to sympathize with you when you have done this stuff to others and brought this on yourself.

[frannie]

All I know is when I was talking to her she looked like someone trying to protect her home and I was the devil. The look in her eyes I will never forget. She truly threw me under the bus.

 

At least you got to see the truth in her eyes, then, although it cannot have been at all pleasant. I haven't read your story, but you had the decency to leave your W rather than settle into cheating on her. Your MW obviously isn't made of the same stuff. The look on her face tells you that she was happy to lie to you all along about her intentions.

 

She may well try to contact you again after the dust settles, or she may decide that as you are the kind of man who doesn't like to live a life of lies you're not the one for her, who knows.

[signedin2008]

I don't know your story. But, I glean that you cheated on your wife and were a particpant in hurting another man and his family. You say your issue is with her and her lying. But, shouldn't your real issue be with yourself? I mean you were lying , as well. You seemed oblivious to the pain you were causing anothe himan being, her husband, as well as the pain you must have inflicted on your wife.

I'd say you need counseling to try to find out how you got this way and whehter there is some way to fix yourself.

It's very hard to sympathize with you when you have done this stuff to others and brought this on yourself.

 

Read the paragraphs above again. I, just like the above poster, wonder how you feel about your wife, your cheating on her, lying to her, and throw you vows away like garbage. While now your wife is probably still feel that something is wrong with her during the time when you were having an affair behind her back. She doesn't even know her own history because you withheld and stole that away from her.

[LadyDi]

I think she'll try and contact you too. She'll get to feeling bad about how she ended it, so you need to take this time to figure out what you're going to do when she does. It may take a few weeks, but I'm betting it'll happen.

 

Sorry for the pain you're going thru. Try and keep busy for now, and try and eat...because I know you won't feel like it, but you need to take care of you for now.

[Confused4Now]

Where's STAMPDADDY? I thought he'd jump in already with his reply of "I TOLD YOU SO!!!!"

 

HEEHEE

[RecordProducer]

I don't know your story. But, I glean that you cheated on your wife and were a particpant in hurting another man and his family. You say your issue is with her and her lying. But, shouldn't your real issue be with yourself? I mean you were lying , as well. You seemed oblivious to the pain you were causing anothe himan being, her husband, as well as the pain you must have inflicted on your wife.

I'd say you need counseling to try to find out how you got this way and whehter there is some way to fix yourself.

It's very hard to sympathize with you when you have done this stuff to others and brought this on yourself.

Why does every thread turn into moralizing and preaching?

 

Yes, God punished him for cheating on his wife and sleeping with another man's property. Now back to the subject.

 

Confused, I'll try to find your other posts to see what was happeneing previously. She could be in love with you, but wanting to stay married for practical reasons; or she might not be in love with you, in which case whatever her feelings for her husband or the marriage means little to you.

 

The problem with dating a married person is that they need to see more benefits from divorcing than from staying married - in order to divorce. And most people aren't so romantic as to leave everything behind in ther name of love, especially when young children are involved. The better father the BS the less willing the MW is to divorce. Finally, many wives just want some love, passion, and nice treatment on the side; they know that affairs are different from marriages and they are not necessarily in love with their boyfriends.

[Confused4Now]

Read the paragraphs above again. I, just like the above poster, wonder how you feel about your wife, your cheating on her, lying to her, and throw you vows away like garbage. While now your wife is probably still feel that something is wrong with her during the time when you were having an affair behind her back. She doesn't even know her own history because you withheld and stole that away from her.

 

Go back and read my story before you say stuff like this...I really don't understand people who only read bits and pieces....sheeeeesh

[Reggie]

Who said anything about God or punishment? Fact is he cheated and betrayed himself, as well. That is self destructive. Why not simply divorce?

[RecordProducer]

OK, read this please. He did leave his wife.

This is the reason I left my marriage it was not fair to my wife.

 

Who said anything about God or punishment? Fact is he cheated and betrayed himself, as well. That is self destructive. Why not simply divorce?

Divorce is not "simple" except when you advise other people to simply divorce.

 

This has nothing to do with the topic. It's actually the opposite! Two people fall in love with one another; he leaves his wife, she doesn't leave her husband. Our guy is apparently disappointed. What's so difficult to understand and why does everything have to turn into preaching?

 

Are you saying that his MW chose her husband over him because he cheated on his wife? No. You're saying that he deserves what he got because he was a bad guy and we cheer for the survival of crappy marriages. Well, if she loved him deeply, maybe she would've "simply" divorced her husband.

[Reggie]

OK, read this please. He did leave his wife.

 

Divorce is not "simple" except when you advise other people to simply divorce.

 

This has nothing to do with the topic. It's actually the opposite! Two people fall in love with one another; he leaves his wife, she doesn't leave her husband. Our guy is apparently disappointed. What's so difficult to understand and why does everything have to turn into preaching?

 

Are you saying that his MW chose her husband over him because he cheated on his wife? No. You're saying that he deserves what he got because he was a bad guy and we cheer for the survival of crappy marriages. Well, if she loved him deeply, maybe she would've "simply" divorced her husband.

 

I was under the impression that he left his wife, post cheating. If I got that wrong, forget about the cheating stuff.

I disagree on the complexity of divorce. It is very straightforward and simple. essentailly it's all accounting. To me , it's clearly simpler than all the cloak and dagger involved in having an affair. And, it is honest and less painful.

[signedin2008]

Go back and read my story before you say stuff like this...I really don't understand people who only read bits and pieces....sheeeeesh

 

The fact is you did have an affair while you were still married to your wife, didn't you?

[Reggie]

OK, read this please. He did leave his wife.

 

Divorce is not "simple" except when you advise other people to simply divorce.

 

This has nothing to do with the topic. It's actually the opposite! Two people fall in love with one another; he leaves his wife, she doesn't leave her husband. Our guy is apparently disappointed. What's so difficult to understand and why does everything have to turn into preaching?

 

Are you saying that his MW chose her husband over him because he cheated on his wife? No. You're saying that he deserves what he got because he was a bad guy and we cheer for the survival of crappy marriages. Well, if she loved him deeply, maybe she would've "simply" divorced her husband.

 

Where's the preaching? And, who cheers for the survival of crappy mariages? Where do you come up with this? Is it projection or paranoia?l I'd suggest reading comprehension remedial work.