astra77 Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 Isn't it funny that you can jump on your computer, randomly google a site like this, and find so many people in a situation that is not unlike the one you have found yourself in.I must admit, I did read ALOT of posts on this site for what seemed like AGES - it was really just a day or two, before I plucked up the courage to post the SAD SORRY story that has become my life. HOWEVER, I was truely surprised with theresponses to my postings . It continues to AMAZE me on a daily basis that although I am depressed AND HAVE MADE SUCH A HOPELESS MESS OF MYSELF, complete strangers that live ALL OVER THE WORLD are there to help, advise and give you a "cyber" reality slap when it is truely due !! PRAISE THE LORD !! I have been in such a dark place for what feels like eternity - but in actual fact has only been 7 or 8 weeks but this site and the posters on it have given me the strength, hope and courage i needed to clean up the mess that my life has become. I know that although i have felt like a failure and totally hopeless for so many reasons, there are people out there in cyber space that actually care. So in conclusion, I would like to send out a GREAT BIG MASSIVE WHOPPING HUGE THANK YOU TO YOU ALL FOR JUST BEING YOU !! What doesn't kill us makes us stronger, what makes us stronger eventually makes us a better person, and isn't becoming a better person a fabulous gift - albeit a very painful experience. I have no doubt i will still have "bad" days, but i am out of the darkness and i can see the light, i know that eventually, the good days will out weigh the bad days - as they are starting to now. GOD BLESS YOU ALL Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 I'm glad you're out of your darkness, Astra and you're right - me too - I have met wonderful people on LS that have helped me when I first came here. Some of them have not been on LS for a long time and your OP made me think about them and realised how much I've missed all of them! I'm with you - God bless those wonderful people and all that have helped you! Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 I hear you, Astra!! LS has prevented me from ENTERING the black hole of darkness to begin with. I'm so very grateful for it. It's an amazing thing. Where else can you get so many third-party views into the same situation, even when you don't agree with some of them?!? Knowledge is power... so crucial in helping us make the right decisions. And it's very comforting to know that I'm not alone, there are many others out there who've been where I am. I know exactly how you feel, and I second your shout-out!!:bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
grumpygirrl Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 Hi Astra, I too want to thank you! With everything that has happened there is one thing that you are going to have to do. It is more difficult than anything that you have experienced. We can go into what is right and what is wrong, I believe we are beyond that point and we are on our way to acceptance. That one thing you are going to have to do is even harder then telling your H if you decide to do that, which I believe you should not. You have to FORGIVE YOURSELF. You have to, if not then you will destroy yourself. I forgive myself and not just with this situation other parts of my life that lead to this situation. When you are ready google "self forgiveness" believe me it will make a world of difference. Today is the first day of the rest of my life...isn't that exciting?! Link to post Share on other sites
Author astra77 Posted July 2, 2008 Author Share Posted July 2, 2008 Hi Astra, I too want to thank you! With everything that has happened there is one thing that you are going to have to do. It is more difficult than anything that you have experienced. We can go into what is right and what is wrong, I believe we are beyond that point and we are on our way to acceptance. That one thing you are going to have to do is even harder then telling your H if you decide to do that, which I believe you should not. You have to FORGIVE YOURSELF. You have to, if not then you will destroy yourself. I forgive myself and not just with this situation other parts of my life that lead to this situation. When you are ready google "self forgiveness" believe me it will make a world of difference. Today is the first day of the rest of my life...isn't that exciting?! This is spot on gg. I think Im at the stage now where I DO have to forgive myself - and yes - this is the hardest part. I will google self forgiveness today. Like yourself, i too was brought up a "good girl" by loving and good parents - i was never an angel, but never the devil either. An A was NEVER going to be in my world, NEVER even thought it could happen to me. I am normally a very good judge of charater, and have my "radar" turned on full. I ALWAYS trust my instincts, but in this case, I did switch my radar off. Still not sure why, the day I met my xmm something instantly "clicked" between us. Its over now so it doesnt matter. Self forgiveness is a hard one, i gotta get googling. I have always been very hard on myself, i expect too much of myself all of the time. But gg you are right, as hard as it is to forgive ME it does have to be done. I blame ME coz I should have known better. I will aim for the stars like you gg, and make today the start of the rest of my life. I finally have a new job, so that will help me start living again instead of existing. Congrats gg, oh and btw, hows your pregnancy going?? Hope all is well. Im off to google !! Link to post Share on other sites
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