nextel Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 MM has been at my house since last week Thursday and left this evening because the children are back from their mother's home. He informed me last week that he had told the W that after the holidays, one of them had to move out and reminded her that the M was over. He told me that she did not respond to him. Anyho, MM has been with me over the weekend into New Year. When he left, he told me that we would get through all these cobwebs. Something is happening here, all these MM leaving their W's. Link to post Share on other sites
OWoman Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Something is happening here, all these MM leaving their W's. :laugh: Perhaps we're all in the mythical "3%"....? :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
Tomcat33 Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Perhaps we're all in the mythical "3%"....? Chya!! :laugh: that was an an interesting point you just posted in the other thread about why people D this time of the year never thought of that, you should post it here it is very much in line with this topic and I thought it was really informative. Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 MM has been at my house since last week Thursday and left this evening because the children are back from their mother's home. So MM is no longer staying with his W? Are they separated? Sorry I asked, I have been away - a lot of catching up to do! Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 That "mythical 3%" is based on the idea of MP/OP being together long term. Its NOT based on the MM 'leaving' his wife. That's short term...it does happen more often than 3%. Its the odds of a SUCCESSFUL, LONG TERM relationship that the "mythical 3%" refers to. You'll probably have to wait 2-4 years to see if you're in that "mythical 3%". Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Ahh, I won't be waiting to see...I already know... Link to post Share on other sites
OWoman Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 You'll probably have to wait 2-4 years to see if you're in that "mythical 3%". I'm the one with the bad track record on that score, so if we're not together, chances are it will be my doing and not his. Link to post Share on other sites
Mino Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 interesting post. My mm just stopped by and told me he is going to move out. I will not hold my breath, but it interesting to see if he can really do it this time. I will continue on my plan, vacation for a month, see result when I get back? Wish me luck:) Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 I also read that the New Year sees the most divorce filings than any other time of year... I think it just goes to show that they do leave...And alot of people don't like to hear that... Link to post Share on other sites
reboot Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Ahh, I won't be waiting to see...I already know...None of us know the future. Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 I'm the one with the bad track record on that score, so if we're not together, chances are it will be my doing and not his. Not saying that its his fault, or its yours...just saying that it tends to be a trend based on the relationship(s) involved. It could have to do with general personality trends of those people who tend to engage in affairs? (please don't take that as a personal attack or comment directly about you...I mean it as a generalized comment/question, and I'm not "aiming" it at anyone) Ahh, I won't be waiting to see...I already know... And I'll be waiting to see. Post back here in five years and send me a PM with an "I told you so!!!!!"...I'll be the first to congratulate you then. Link to post Share on other sites
OWoman Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Not saying that its his fault, or its yours...just saying that it tends to be a trend based on the relationship(s) involved. It could have to do with general personality trends of those people who tend to engage in affairs? (please don't take that as a personal attack or comment directly about you...I mean it as a generalized comment/question, and I'm not "aiming" it at anyone). My father is still married to his OW after more than two decades - longer than he was with my mother. OTOH, ten minutes is good going for me where a R is concerned so I'm not quite sure what personality traits we'd have in common... Interesting idea though - it's gotten me thinking along a new path and one I'm not altogether sure I want to venture down! Link to post Share on other sites
GirlZilla Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Man....this thread is freaking me out. My xH just called me to tell me good friends of our are splittling up....There is definately something going on... Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Yes there is something about the Holidays... Strange Last year, just before Christmas, my MM (from work) wanted to leave his wife and move with me... I had to break up with him to make him come back to reality... LOL My stepdaughter was told on a NY Eve's that he was leaving her for another woman... It is a ****ty time though to end the M... Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 My father is still married to his OW after more than two decades - longer than he was with my mother. OTOH, ten minutes is good going for me where a R is concerned so I'm not quite sure what personality traits we'd have in common... Interesting idea though - it's gotten me thinking along a new path and one I'm not altogether sure I want to venture down! I was 18 years with my first ex... I was the OW for 11 years prior to him moving with me.. I left after almost 2 decades... Link to post Share on other sites
imstunned Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 can somebody throw some of this my way please? Link to post Share on other sites
GirlZilla Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 can somebody throw some of this my way please? LOL...I was secretly thinking the same thing Stunned! Shhh... Link to post Share on other sites
imstunned Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 lol - we will get flamed! At the very least this thread has helped me realise that my ex mm and his wife probably havent had the "fantasy" christmas and new year that I have put myself through hell imaganing them to have had! So thanks!! Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 And I'll be waiting to see. Post back here in five years and send me a PM with an "I told you so!!!!!"...I'll be the first to congratulate you then. Not to be rude, but I highly doubt I'm going to be sticking around LS for that purpose... I don't have an agenda...I just want to live happily with the man I love...And if someone's not a friend to the R, then they're not going to help it grow are they? Negativity serves many purposes and one thing I won't do is let it affect my life or R...I'm here to help others cope in the situation they are in...But I can't see staying forever and focusing on a part of my life that will be over...Especially for such an immature reason to gloat because I was right... Link to post Share on other sites
InvisibleGirl Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 The holidays were definetly tough. I only got to see MM twice over the last two weeks. But today we got to have lunch and he asked me if he could at least have a hug for New Years and I got my New Year's kiss, it was amazing Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Not saying that its his fault, or its yours...just saying that it tends to be a trend based on the relationship(s) involved. It could have to do with general personality trends of those people who tend to engage in affairs? (please don't take that as a personal attack or comment directly about you...I mean it as a generalized comment/question, and I'm not "aiming" it at anyone) Can you expand on this? I realize that you're not aiming it at anyone here... I just want to know what you mean. Do you see common personality traits among those who cheat? I've always assumed that infidelity is so widespread in our society that it covered the entire spectrum - all genders, origins, classes, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Frances Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 The holidays were definetly tough. I only got to see MM twice over the last two weeks. But today we got to have lunch and he asked me if he could at least have a hug for New Years and I got my New Year's kiss, it was amazing You sound young. Do you really know what you are mixed up in? What is the age difference and does he have children? You do know that MM tell lies and use OW. Link to post Share on other sites
OWoman Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 You do know that MM tell lies and use OW. sometimes. And sometimes it's their wives they're lying to. And sometimes to themselves. Each situation is different - I've had enough As to have learned that. Link to post Share on other sites
White Flower Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 So MM is no longer staying with his W? Are they separated? Sorry I asked, I have been away - a lot of catching up to do! We've missed you Lyssa! How are you? Link to post Share on other sites
White Flower Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Can you expand on this? I realize that you're not aiming it at anyone here... I just want to know what you mean. Do you see common personality traits among those who cheat? I've always assumed that infidelity is so widespread in our society that it covered the entire spectrum - all genders, origins, classes, etc. What is new to me is the fact that it is so widespread. I was so innocent; I really thought it was rare and sensationalized and that I was one of few that was taking a risk. Yet, this last year I had so many people confess to me that they have cheated in the past or are now starting something on the side. The two most recent are my very best friends and I have not even yet told them of my A. What the heck is going on? Is it that we (women in our late 30s/early 40s) feel we've wasted so much time on the wrong person and when someone "perfect" comes along we snag him up before we have a chance to realize that if we waited after D we could find another Mr Wonderful? Is it that we're so hurt-lonely-desperate that we think we won't find another like MM? Sorry to get slightly off track. Perhaps more people file for a D after the New Year as a resolution to better their lives. Link to post Share on other sites
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