lost4ever Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Sure some have read my story, I have been having an affair for over a year with a MM and my DD was 3weeks ago. My husband and I are getting a divorce My question is what the hell is the MM thinking. I broke up with my MM a week before I told my husband. The MM and I did not talk for another week after H found out, when MM called I told him my husband knows everything, and he wants to tell your wife. MM acts like it is no big deal, acts like we never broke up and such. A few minutes later he calls me and says will you do me a favor and next time your husband ask tell him I told my wife, I said no I will not do that.... Anyways my MM goes right back into my life like I never broke up with him, texting me sexy things and calling and e-mailing, me being a dumb a$$, doesn't tell him to stop, but I do ask him what are you doing? If my H finds out we are talking he WILL make sure your wife finds out, my MM says, well if I get caught I get caught. Now, my mm has not said it to my face, but I know he will not leave his W, and I know I don't want to be his W. He makes plans to see me, in 2 weeks, (I haven't told him yes/ no yet) then, just now, he forwards a joke, to two people only, me and his wife...wtf is he doing???? Now she has my E-mail, I have hers, WHAT IS HE DOING???? Link to post Share on other sites
annabelle75 Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Sure some have read my story, I have been having an affair for over a year with a MM and my DD was 3weeks ago. My husband and I are getting a divorce My question is what the hell is the MM thinking. I broke up with my MM a week before I told my husband. The MM and I did not talk for another week after H found out, when MM called I told him my husband knows everything, and he wants to tell your wife. MM acts like it is no big deal, acts like we never broke up and such. A few minutes later he calls me and says will you do me a favor and next time your husband ask tell him I told my wife, I said no I will not do that.... Anyways my MM goes right back into my life like I never broke up with him, texting me sexy things and calling and e-mailing, me being a dumb a$$, doesn't tell him to stop, but I do ask him what are you doing? If my H finds out we are talking he WILL make sure your wife finds out, my MM says, well if I get caught I get caught. Now, my mm has not said it to my face, but I know he will not leave his W, and I know I don't want to be his W. He makes plans to see me, in 2 weeks, (I haven't told him yes/ no yet) then, just now, he forwards a joke, to two people only, me and his wife...wtf is he doing???? Now she has my E-mail, I have hers, WHAT IS HE DOING???? Sounds like he is trying to get caught. He has a bad case of "I won't leave my wife but, if she leaves me that's her choice." So to put it bluntly, he's an idiot and a coward. He wants some one else to do his dirty work. I hope his wife does find out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lost4ever Posted August 3, 2007 Author Share Posted August 3, 2007 Oh this is the worst move he could have pulled, what a piece of poo I am for ever getting into this mess! Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Lost, Hindsight is always 20/20. Ha, you want to hear about some poo? I dumped this girl 3 weeks ago and it still hasnt sunk in. I was pretty darn clear about it too. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lost4ever Posted August 3, 2007 Author Share Posted August 3, 2007 Lost, Hindsight is always 20/20. Ha, you want to hear about some poo? I dumped this girl 3 weeks ago and it still hasnt sunk in. I was pretty darn clear about it too. Ok, you got a smile out of me Thank you! So many things running through my head, why did I try so hard not to hurt his wife and kids, when he just thinks it's the funnest thing ever, I actually think he wants the "fight" to happen....I want to scream!!!! When I told MM that I told my H everything, the only thing he said was I'm surprised I didn't get a call from your H (with a cocky grin)(not that I could see the grin, we were on the phone, but I could hear it).... You know if my mind and my heart could agree on anything I wouldn't be in this mess....On paper he looked great (H) he felt wrong, On paper(MM) he was all wrong, but felt so good. what a life I choose to live.,..man, crap, this sucks Link to post Share on other sites
East of Jupiter Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Sure some have read my story, I have been having an affair for over a year with a MM and my DD was 3weeks ago. My husband and I are getting a divorce My question is what the hell is the MM thinking. I broke up with my MM a week before I told my husband. The MM and I did not talk for another week after H found out, when MM called I told him my husband knows everything, and he wants to tell your wife. MM acts like it is no big deal, acts like we never broke up and such. A few minutes later he calls me and says will you do me a favor and next time your husband ask tell him I told my wife, I said no I will not do that.... Anyways my MM goes right back into my life like I never broke up with him, texting me sexy things and calling and e-mailing, me being a dumb a$$, doesn't tell him to stop, but I do ask him what are you doing? If my H finds out we are talking he WILL make sure your wife finds out, my MM says, well if I get caught I get caught. Now, my mm has not said it to my face, but I know he will not leave his W, and I know I don't want to be his W. He makes plans to see me, in 2 weeks, (I haven't told him yes/ no yet) then, just now, he forwards a joke, to two people only, me and his wife...wtf is he doing???? Now she has my E-mail, I have hers, WHAT IS HE DOING???? Maybe, it wasnt him who sent the joke e-mail. From what you say, he has been very cavalier about his actions which to me translates into arrogance, not stupidity. He thinks he has his wife fooled. Maybe he doesn't. Can you verify that it was him who sent it? Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Well, if we didnt make mistakes, and we never had bad times, we would never learn to appreciate the good things when they come our way. I really cant say what Mr MM. is thinking. Actually he probably isnt thinking. Good chance he has zero respect for his wife, doesnt think his actions affect his kids, and thinks he can still be with you. Perhaps he is going to try out for the stupidity triathalon. Its nothing but upside for you! The worst is 3 weeks behind you. All you need to do is take control of the situation. Some advice I probably should take. I guess I should hop on the phone and let a certain someone know that "friends" dont call each other at work to leave 10 voicemails a day. Link to post Share on other sites
child_of_isis Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 I'll tell you what he is doing, he is trying to keep you on his good side so you will do what he asks....which is to tell your H that he already told his wife.Sure some have read my story, I have been having an affair for over a year with a MM and my DD was 3weeks ago. My husband and I are getting a divorce My question is what the hell is the MM thinking. I broke up with my MM a week before I told my husband. The MM and I did not talk for another week after H found out, when MM called I told him my husband knows everything, and he wants to tell your wife. MM acts like it is no big deal, acts like we never broke up and such. A few minutes later he calls me and says will you do me a favor and next time your husband ask tell him I told my wife, I said no I will not do that.... Anyways my MM goes right back into my life like I never broke up with him, texting me sexy things and calling and e-mailing, me being a dumb a$$, doesn't tell him to stop, but I do ask him what are you doing? If my H finds out we are talking he WILL make sure your wife finds out, my MM says, well if I get caught I get caught. Now, my mm has not said it to my face, but I know he will not leave his W, and I know I don't want to be his W. He makes plans to see me, in 2 weeks, (I haven't told him yes/ no yet) then, just now, he forwards a joke, to two people only, me and his wife...wtf is he doing???? Now she has my E-mail, I have hers, WHAT IS HE DOING???? Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Why not stop worrying about what he is doing and worry about what YOU are doing...Do you have a plan? Have you thought about what you want? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Why not stop worrying about what he is doing and worry about what YOU are doing...Do you have a plan? Have you thought about what you want? Why worry about him? Just ignore him... simple. Move on... think about what YOU will do with your life after the divorce... never mind anyone else... Link to post Share on other sites
scaredinlove Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 He is trying to get caught. He will regret it ! Link to post Share on other sites
Author lost4ever Posted August 4, 2007 Author Share Posted August 4, 2007 yeha, it's really not worth thinking about, more than likely he did it just so I would call him and ask him what he is thinking. I'm over it now, (well trying really hard to be over it) stay turned it might change! I have a plan for my life after divorce (I'm sorry for what I did, hurting my H and all) but I'm really excited to live on my own, and I'm going back to school to get my MBA, so yeah, for me! and my life can only go up (I think, I hope) these last weeks were crazy, My family (crazy people) got into a huge fight, I turned a whole load of my clothes pink, my I-pod was stolen, and my watch broke, I really don't know why I picked an e-mail to worry about. Hey Cobra, good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 Oh this is the worst move he could have pulled, what a piece of poo I am for ever getting into this mess! I hate to say it, but, that is some of the cost you pay when you have an affair! Soooo, are you gonna meet OM? You know if you do, you'll have orgasmic sex again! Do you think it's a good Idea to do this? Hows your husband doing? Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 yeha, it's really not worth thinking about, more than likely he did it just so I would call him and ask him what he is thinking. I'm over it now, (well trying really hard to be over it) stay turned it might change! I have a plan for my life after divorce (I'm sorry for what I did, hurting my H and all) but I'm really excited to live on my own, and I'm going back to school to get my MBA, so yeah, for me! and my life can only go up (I think, I hope) these last weeks were crazy, My family (crazy people) got into a huge fight, I turned a whole load of my clothes pink, my I-pod was stolen, and my watch broke, I really don't know why I picked an e-mail to worry about. Hey Cobra, good luck There you go! You said it - you have so much more to look forward to than to worry about the email. Let xMM get himself into trouble. You should just FOCUS on YOU now! All the best! Link to post Share on other sites
Author lost4ever Posted August 4, 2007 Author Share Posted August 4, 2007 Hows your husband doing? I guess he is fine, he is not hysterical anymore which is good b/c he was really making me feel bad, he never hit the anger stage, which is kind of freaking me out, I have been on best behavior (trying to avoid getting into fights). I go straight to work, straight home, (though I went to the store tuesday around 6:30, gone for 22min) he was soooo mad when I arrived home...craziness you'll have orgasmic sex again! Do you think it's a good Idea to do this? yeah, It's a good idea for me, right now! Great stress reliever! I mean I really am done with him, but it's so easy, I don't have to try to find another guy, I know he's great in bed, and it seems the damage is all ready done on my end, I don't see how having sex with him (one more time) would make it any worse....I really sound like a crack addict, nice!~ Link to post Share on other sites
Author lost4ever Posted August 4, 2007 Author Share Posted August 4, 2007 Lyssa, No problem being focused on me, really. I'm pretty selfish, I really don't want my H or MM in my life, but it feels like neither of them want to leave, (and I do love them both) I tell my friends everyday that can't wait for classes to start so I can be out of the house until 10pm, then if I work all day, I should be too busy to think about either of them, though I always find time somwhere! Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 yeah, It's a good idea for me, right now! Great stress reliever! I mean I really am done with him, but it's so easy, I don't have to try to find another guy, I know he's great in bed, and it seems the damage is all ready done on my end, I don't see how having sex with him (one more time) would make it any worse....I really sound like a crack addict, nice!~ I was under the impression that only guys think like this! Perhaps, its because I had some similar thoughts a couple weeks back. Now Ive got a full blown disaster on my hands. I think the risk vs. benefit is not worth trying. Imagine wife gets upset and puts in a complaint to his boss, cause she can now backtrack your email to find you. On a side note... anyone have a quick hangover remedy? Ive got a race today in like 2 hours and the world is still spinning. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lost4ever Posted August 4, 2007 Author Share Posted August 4, 2007 Hair of the dog, do a shot Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 Well, its worked in the past so I guess Ill give it a "shot". I think Ill be good if the world just stops moving. I really dont wanna to fall off the boat. Salute! Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted August 4, 2007 Share Posted August 4, 2007 Lyssa, I tell my friends everyday that can't wait for classes to start so I can be out of the house until 10pm, then if I work all day, I should be too busy to think about either of them, though I always find time somwhere! Lol - I know what you mean! Sometimes when you're busy, just for a split second you think about one of them etc.. hate when that happens! Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 Hows your husband doing? I guess he is fine, he is not hysterical anymore which is good b/c he was really making me feel bad, he never hit the anger stage, which is kind of freaking me out, I have been on best behavior (trying to avoid getting into fights). I go straight to work, straight home, (though I went to the store tuesday around 6:30, gone for 22min) he was soooo mad when I arrived home...craziness you'll have orgasmic sex again! Do you think it's a good Idea to do this? yeah, It's a good idea for me, right now! Great stress reliever! I mean I really am done with him, but it's so easy, I don't have to try to find another guy, I know he's great in bed, and it seems the damage is all ready done on my end, I don't see how having sex with him (one more time) would make it any worse....I really sound like a crack addict, nice!~ I'm going to assume that you are being serious about banging OM again, what about all the stuff you said to your hubby about being so sorry about having an affair with this OM? You don't sound sorry, it almost sounds like you're glad you did this to your husband. Your husband will see that that was all a lie, your husband may be one who would be willing to work on the marriage although you have told him that you're not. What, you're gonna ride OM again while your husband continues to remain faithful to you? You're gonna hurt your husband some more? While you're still married to your husband, and living under his roof? That would be insult to injury! Do you realize if you do this again, although your husband knows what you did, and he isn't freaking out like you said he was,(remember YOU did that to him!) that you may push him over the edge, and he may/would get physically violent (hit)with you, or kill you?! He may kill himself! Even if you met OM elsewhere, what if your husband came looking for you, and heard you orgasming loudly, how would he feel? How would he react? He might kill you and OM, happens all the time! Your hubby hasn't hit the anger stage, YET, but he WILL! Some people take longer to process the information given to them than others, it's almost like shellshock, they slow down. I've heard people who go through stuff like this go through a grieving stage, that's why he hasn't gotten to the anger stage. He got angry with you for going to the store because he pictures you and OM getting it on! He's jealous of you, jealous of OM giving you great orgasms, being larger (longer and/or thicker) and better sex! Your husband's self esteem and self worth are shot because of what you've done to him! He doesn't eat, sleep, smile, or anything that he used to huh? He's probably saying to himself, "why me?" How would you feel if he did that to you? I hope you read this before you go BANG OM again! GO right now and take a good look in the mirror at yourself, do you like what you see, what you've done to your husband? That's you! We can't stop you from doing this again, but how could you look at your husband knowing how much you destroyed him, and sleep with OM again? Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 I want you to read this at least 2 or 3 times through, Lost, and ask yourself, was it worth it? Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 I KNOW I'm harsh, but, lady, you need it! Look at what you threw away, your husband! Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 I'm going to assume that you are being serious about banging OM again, what about all the stuff you said to your hubby about being so sorry about having an affair with this OM? You don't sound sorry, it almost sounds like you're glad you did this to your husband. We can't stop you from doing this again, but how could you look at your husband knowing how much you destroyed him, and sleep with OM again? Vader, You make good points. I think this MM is just using her. I dont think she can change that by using him back. I think that makes him powerful, and at some point she is just going to realize that she got used... causing further pain. Ever know one of those girls in highschool that cut themselves? Perhaps this is just an emotional variation of the same behavior. Oh.... for anyone who cares. I won my race today, by displaying a form of drunken mastery heretofore unwitnessed on planet earth! The guys did throw me overboard after winning the second heat, but I think that was in celebration. And Vader, Ive been going through a certain situation. If I posted this in the dating section, would you provide me some feedback? Link to post Share on other sites
vanilla chai Posted August 5, 2007 Share Posted August 5, 2007 Does this man have a spine? This is his opportunity to come clean and tell his bw. Link to post Share on other sites
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