annabelle75 Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 I think we are all so afraid as coming off as cruel, that we back off from being honest about the betrayed spouse’s of the MM/MW we have been involved with. I think its time to let it all out! What is your BS horror story? What did the BS in your relationship do that you find disgusting? I think it is time we are honest with each other and put it all out there. What did the BS in my situation do? I’ve spoken of her before and how she treated me and caused trouble in my life even though I was as much a victim of her husband’s lies as she was, but let me get down to the nitty gritty of why I despise her so much as a person. Why did the MM stay with her? Because she threatened to kill herself and have his step-daughter, that he had raised for the last 7 years, sent to live with her grandparents so he would never see her again. After he finally agreed to stay she then decided that they would have an open marriage and she now regularly screws other men and woman (decided on a new hobby I guess). I find the threats she made to be deplorable and I personally would never lower myself to having to threaten a man to stay with me. I would never choose to be with a man that doesn’t want to be with me. I’m not that needy or pathetic. Phew …….. glad I got that off my chest. I would like to add the disclaimer that I don’t believe that all BS are like her at all. I know every situation is different and I would never make assumptions that the BS here are just like her. I just don’t like the assumption that all BS are just helpless victims. She was cruel and manipulative. I understand why he cheated on her and tried to leave. I hope some day he has the guts to call her bluff. Link to post Share on other sites
Impudent Oyster Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 Why did the MM stay with her? Because she threatened to kill herself and have his step-daughter, that he had raised for the last 7 years, sent to live with her grandparents so he would never see her again. . And you believe this proven liar's story? Wow. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 I have always said that OW should choose their BS's carefully! Sounds like you both got off quite lightly! Its definately a shame that your life was affected by this crazy woman. Possibly there is a lesson to be learned that one should choose to only involve themselves in manipulating the lives of completely sane people. What did the BS in your relationship do that you find disgusting? I think it is time we are honest with each other and put it all out there. Disgusting??? If there is a BS in your relationship then I'm not sure that anything else could be more deplorable or disgusting, how could she even match it. Link to post Share on other sites
TogetherForever Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 Maybe we should have posted this in the "My husband/wife is cheating on me right under my nose. For the 100th time - forum Link to post Share on other sites
Tomcat33 Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 I think it IS time. My ex and I had been together for two months and I was over at his apartment one night and his W hadn't found out about us yet but was desperately wanting him to move back home with her, he and I were back at his place and she had been calling his house all evening. Finally he answered the phone and took the call, he knew something was up 'cause normally he would just turn his cell off and ignore it. Well he answered the phone and was on the phone with her for nearly half an hour because she was hysterically crying and begging him to come back home. I sat right next to him hearing her wailing from the other end. In the end she also threatened to kill herself if he did not go back home to give their marriage another chance! I heard every single word she was screaming on the other end it was hard NOT to hear it. needless to say our evening got cut short because he had to go console her, of course I told her he HAD to I was afraid she might hurt herself. But he ended up going and eventually called her sister to go take care of her since she was out of her mind that night....her sister didn't even budge, her response was "she'll get over it" Nice family... I have more embarassing stories to tell but I won't that one is bad enough. I have done a lot of things in my life but if there is one thing I would NEVER do is beg a man to come back into my life, let alone threaten to end my life for him YIKES!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Tomcat33 Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 And you believe this proven liar's story? Wow. Didn't you believe the proven liar of your H when you took him back? Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 Didn't you believe the proven liar of your H when you took him back? PRICELESS!!!! You go girl!:bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
Author annabelle75 Posted July 27, 2007 Author Share Posted July 27, 2007 I think it IS time. My ex and I had been together for two months and I was over at his apartment one night and his W hadn't found out about us yet but was desperately wanting him to move back home with her, he and I were back at his place and she had been calling his house all evening. Finally he answered the phone and took the call, he knew something was up 'cause normally he would just turn his cell off and ignore it. Well he answered the phone and was on the phone with her for nearly half an hour because she was hysterically crying and begging him to come back home. I sat right next to him hearing her wailing from the other end. In the end she also threatened to kill herself if he did not go back home to give their marriage another chance! I heard every single word she was screaming on the other end it was hard NOT to hear it. needless to say our evening got cut short because he had to go console her, of course I told her he HAD to I was afraid she might hurt herself. But he ended up going and eventually called her sister to go take care of her since she was out of her mind that night....her sister didn't even budge, her response was "she'll get over it" Nice family... I have more embarassing stories to tell but I won't that one is bad enough. I have done a lot of things in my life but if there is one thing I would NEVER do is beg a man to come back into my life, let alone threaten to end my life for him YIKES!!! That story sound salot like others I have heard from OW, that have dealt with BS. It happens alot. After the **** hit the fan and both the BS and I found out what was happening, he instatntly told her he wanted a divorce and begged me give him another chance. i eventually gave in because the moron I was, I loved him. One morning at about 1am, he was on the phone with me in his home office (he hadn't moved out yet and was sleeping on a couch to try to make things less messy for his kids) I had the privilege of listening to her screaming at the top of her lungs, "I'm going to slit my ****in throat and it's all your daddy's fault!" She then went into a screaming fit that lasted almost an hour. By the end of it, their kids were hysterically crying and hidding in the back yard. It was at that moment I lost all respect for her. Link to post Share on other sites
outofdarkness Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 Maybe we should have posted this in the "My husband/wife is cheating on me right under my nose. For the 100th time - forum LOL..you're so funny!!! Why rub it in? You all are the one's who are cheating w/ the MM's..You know it's wrong, yet you keep on ribbing and poking fun...sorry to horn in on the OW forum..just couldn't resist..I've tried to stay away for awhile, but LS is in my blood...FYI...Yes, many times they DO do it right under our noses, but we stay for reasons other then just to be w/ the s.....Those reasons may seem trivial to YOU all but they aren't to us, depending on what the situation is. I just find it funny that YOU all think it's funny....Anyone can be an insane jerk..OW, BS, MM...etc..They'er everywhere..Just watch the news one night! Link to post Share on other sites
Author annabelle75 Posted July 27, 2007 Author Share Posted July 27, 2007 LOL..you're so funny!!! Why rub it in? You all are the one's who are cheating w/ the MM's..You know it's wrong, yet you keep on ribbing and poking fun...sorry to horn in on the OW forum..just couldn't resist..I've tried to stay away for awhile, but LS is in my blood...FYI...Yes, many times they DO do it right under our noses, but we stay for reasons other then just to be w/ the s.....Those reasons may seem trivial to YOU all but they aren't to us, depending on what the situation is. I just find it funny that YOU all think it's funny....Anyone can be an insane jerk..OW, BS, MM...etc..They'er everywhere..Just watch the news one night! Us writting about OUR problems in OUR forum, isn't rubbing it in anyone's face. If you choose to come here and read it, that's your fault not ours. Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted July 27, 2007 Share Posted July 27, 2007 I never had any problems with the BS... a few found out... one caught us but I didn't know he was married...she was nice to me... we talked on the phone on a few occasions... I felt sorry for her... he had been cheating on her from the beginning, 3 months after they got married, 20 years ago... and she could never nailed him... she needed a proof and even with the proof, she decided to swallow her pain and stay with him... He contacted me again and again... In general, the BS choose to believe the cheater... he will say everything he can to save his butt... and not to lose his financial security, the kids and the friends... deep down, he doesn't really care to lose his wife... and I'm not saying that to be nasty...it's the truth. Another one was caught by his W, when he left his laptop on the dining table... she quickly copied and sent all the emails to her account so she could read them later... He was erasing all his traces but he forgot about the 'sent' folder... all the emails were there. It was hell for him for a little while... he called me, begging me to lie if she would call me... he denied the whole thing...put everything on my 'back' and begged me to say it was all true... she never called me... They went on MC...he said he would leave me for the time being, until everything would get back to normal... I never heard back from him... and I'm not interested anymore. Right now... this MM I see regularly and with whom I work... is totally in love with me... he contacts me several times a day...always checking what I'm doing...blablabla... His W is very dependant on him... she's not working outside, she babysits kids at home... she calls him several times a day, asking him stupid questions... He has always been at home... so the only time we can get together is during work hours. When he comes over... she will call him 2-3 times... to ask him about the coffee pot, the dog... etc... stupid questions... I honestly don't know why he's still with her... I find her dumb.. but she's a good mother, totally devouted to her husband and kids... He told me once that he loves her but she's not mentally challenging, I guess he won't admit that she's a little dumb... I shouldn't say 'dumb' but she's more like socially 'challenged' because all day long, she has no one to talk to except young kids. She's had done that for over 15 years... From what I hear from the MMs I see, they all love their wife, but the kids, their career and their financial security come first... and their own pleasure. I don't believe in monogamy... If all cheaters are idiots and liars then that makes over 90% of the male population idiots and liars... LOL and Once a cheater, always a cheater, it's only a matter of time after they get caught...it can take a few years, but they will cheat again if they have the opportunity...it's that simple. Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 I just don’t like the assumption that all BS are just helpless victims. To be honest, I don't like the assumption that ANYONE is a helpless victim. Everybody's got a backbone, they just have to learn to use it. Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 and Once a cheater, always a cheater, it's only a matter of time after they get caught...it can take a few years, but they will cheat again if they have the opportunity...it's that simple. Sorry, Lizzie, but this just ain't true. And ya know how come I know? Because I cheated - once. And that once was a long time ago. I know I will never cheat again, just as I know my husband will never cheat again. Link to post Share on other sites
outofdarkness Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 I never had any problems with the BS... a few found out... one caught us but I didn't know he was married...she was nice to me... we talked on the phone on a few occasions... I felt sorry for her... he had been cheating on her from the beginning, 3 months after they got married, 20 years ago... and she could never nailed him... she needed a proof and even with the proof, she decided to swallow her pain and stay with him... He contacted me again and again... In general, the BS choose to believe the cheater... he will say everything he can to save his butt... and not to lose his financial security, the kids and the friends... deep down, he doesn't really care to lose his wife... and I'm not saying that to be nasty...it's the truth. Another one was caught by his W, when he left his laptop on the dining table... she quickly copied and sent all the emails to her account so she could read them later... He was erasing all his traces but he forgot about the 'sent' folder... all the emails were there. It was hell for him for a little while... he called me, begging me to lie if she would call me... he denied the whole thing...put everything on my 'back' and begged me to say it was all true... she never called me... They went on MC...he said he would leave me for the time being, until everything would get back to normal... I never heard back from him... and I'm not interested anymore. Right now... this MM I see regularly and with whom I work... is totally in love with me... he contacts me several times a day...always checking what I'm doing...blablabla... His W is very dependant on him... she's not working outside, she babysits kids at home... she calls him several times a day, asking him stupid questions... He has always been at home... so the only time we can get together is during work hours. When he comes over... she will call him 2-3 times... to ask him about the coffee pot, the dog... etc... stupid questions... I honestly don't know why he's still with her... I find her dumb.. but she's a good mother, totally devouted to her husband and kids... He told me once that he loves her but she's not mentally challenging, I guess he won't admit that she's a little dumb... I shouldn't say 'dumb' but she's more like socially 'challenged' because all day long, she has no one to talk to except young kids. She's had done that for over 15 years... From what I hear from the MMs I see, they all love their wife, but the kids, their career and their financial security come first... and their own pleasure. I don't believe in monogamy... If all cheaters are idiots and liars then that makes over 90% of the male population idiots and liars... LOL and Once a cheater, always a cheater, it's only a matter of time after they get caught...it can take a few years, but they will cheat again if they have the opportunity...it's that simple. and...you're avatar speaks a thousand words...Need I say more? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 Sorry, Lizzie, but this just ain't true. And ya know how come I know? Because I cheated - once. And that once was a long time ago. I know I will never cheat again, just as I know my husband will never cheat again. I think it's a lot easier for a woman to cheat once and never cheat again... while it is much harder for a man... You can talk about yourself.. you may believe that you will never ever cheat again... but you can't talk for him... because you don't know that. Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 I think it's a lot easier for a woman to cheat once and never cheat again... while it is much harder for a man... I knew you'd say that. I don't agree. You can talk about yourself.. you may believe that you will never ever cheat again... but you can't talk for him... because you don't know that. I can talk about myself, and know it without a bit of a doubt. I can also say it for my husband, and also know without a bit of a doubt. Maybe some people can't, but yeah, I can - and do. Link to post Share on other sites
Cliche Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 MM's BS hasn't done anything to me, and she hasn't done much to MM about me other than poke at him a bit (I suspect she may say not so nice stuff about me or the situation, but MM wouldn't tell me if she did to save my feelings). I didn't believe my MM for a long time, but now that I see how things are unfolding with her leaving, I'm starting to see how honest he was being....she simply doesn't want him--doesn't have any inclination to fight for him, and he doesn't want her. They were a habit. So I suspect her feelings may be hurt at the notion of "being replaced" before there was an official ending, but it seems it is not enough for her to have any high drama so *I* have no horror stories. I will say that she has, over the course of their marriage, repeatedly made some cruel comments to MM about certain aspects of his personality and they have hurt his self esteem in ways I'm not even sure he's aware of. He tries not to speak ill of her much, but sometimes in the quiet of the night, during pillow talk, some of the pain comes out. I believe MM when he says that she is generally a very nice person, but what she has done to him makes me very angry at her (I don't tell MM that, though). I'll never understand how people who claim to love each other try so hard to intentionally make those they love feel so inadequate. Link to post Share on other sites
outofdarkness Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 MM's BS hasn't done anything to me, and she hasn't done much to MM about me other than poke at him a bit (I suspect she may say not so nice stuff about me or the situation, but MM wouldn't tell me if she did to save my feelings). I didn't believe my MM for a long time, but now that I see how things are unfolding with her leaving, I'm starting to see how honest he was being....she simply doesn't want him--doesn't have any inclination to fight for him, and he doesn't want her. They were a habit. So I suspect her feelings may be hurt at the notion of "being replaced" before there was an official ending, but it seems it is not enough for her to have any high drama so *I* have no horror stories. I will say that she has, over the course of their marriage, repeatedly made some cruel comments to MM about certain aspects of his personality and they have hurt his self esteem in ways I'm not even sure he's aware of. He tries not to speak ill of her much, but sometimes in the quiet of the night, during pillow talk, some of the pain comes out. I believe MM when he says that she is generally a very nice person, but what she has done to him makes me very angry at her (I don't tell MM that, though). I'll never understand how people who claim to love each other try so hard to intentionally make those they love feel so inadequate. Well..It's alot different when you're actually M to someone and you have many other things to deal w/ besides just "pillow talk"...Sometimes, there is simply no time for pillow talk...A's aren't reality...That's just not how real R's are... Link to post Share on other sites
BusinessSocks Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 Well, I'll share what my ex-h, who was a BS, threatened when I made it clear I was leaving him: he threatened to kill my dog! How low is that? So I had to go steal my own dog while he was at work one day so nothing would happen to it! Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 Can't remember the OW who posted the thread right now, but the MM's wife, the BS, pushed her down an escalater. Link to post Share on other sites
IWALH Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 Eh. She and I probably would have been friends under different circumstances. But she made it very clear that I am a disgusting human being so, yeah. Probably won't be speaking to her again for the rest of my life, unfortunately (I know I know... I made my bed). Definitely not her husband ever again. And the worst she has ever done was call me a bunch of really disgusting, degrading names... though I'm sure I deserved some of it. Oh and she also consulted a psychic about me and believed what they had to say, which I just find weird. Psychics and astrology, etc. is all fun and games but to really believe it is a bit odd. She never did anything to me, though, like push me down a flight of stairs or anything, haha. However, I do have to say... after I saw the movie "Match Point" I was scared out of my mind. Even though it's the MM who does the bad stuff in that movie... but still.... Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 I think it's a lot easier for a woman to cheat once and never cheat again... while it is much harder for a man... You can talk about yourself.. you may believe that you will never ever cheat again... but you can't talk for him... because you don't know that. Yup true.. it's a lot easier for a woman.. a lot harder for a man... Even some of my guy friends said so... Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 BS suspected that I'm having an affair with her husband. She emailed me several times but none of my replies indicated that I know her husband. After that, she just stopped emailing. But what those other BS have done, I think it's just sad. I do not beg any man to stay. I wouldn't want my man to stay when I know for a fact, he doesn't want to. It's not fair for him and I for sure, just don't like the idea of begging. Heck! I never beg for anything!! Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 Us writting about OUR problems in OUR forum, isn't rubbing it in anyone's face. If you choose to come here and read it, that's your fault not ours. :lmao: I'll stop when you do! Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted July 28, 2007 Share Posted July 28, 2007 Can't remember the OW who posted the thread right now, but the MM's wife, the BS, pushed her down an escalater. Could be mistaken but didn't we find out that that one was part of an experiment or am I confused. Link to post Share on other sites
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