shadow11001 Posted July 15, 2013 Share Posted July 15, 2013 (edited) Me and my wife were married in November 2010. She was 17 and I was 19. Well about six months into our marriage she cheated on me with an old friend of hers, Jerry, they had sex on our bed while I was in the other room. When I confronted her about it she said that she wanted closure from him cause she used to have a crush on him. I dumbly allowed this and they proceeded to have sex about six more times until she stopped and promised not to do it again. Then about six months later we had a fight and I spent the night at a friends. When I came home she said that what I did was way worse than she has ever done and I should let her have an affair with our mutual friend Matt. They kiss and makeout and one time had sex. It still goes on and she says she loves me and can't live without me but she can't be without Matt cause she loves him too. I've been super depressed and been contemplating suicide. But she still won't break it off. Any response? Edited July 16, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
Eggplant Posted July 15, 2013 Share Posted July 15, 2013 (edited) She's awful. Her behavior is beyond outrageous. Get away from her. Edited July 16, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted July 15, 2013 Share Posted July 15, 2013 Do not commit suicide. She isn't worth it. Plus, you have a lot of people - family and friends who would be so devastated if you took your own life. Sorry I say divorce her because she is obviously not wife material right now and she's immature. Get some counseling to help you cope with this in a healthy way. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
aliveagain Posted July 15, 2013 Share Posted July 15, 2013 Go immediately to your pastor and talk to someone about your suicide thoughts, talk to someone you trust, she is not worth the sweat on your b*lls. Tomorrow file for divorce, get this disaster, this succubus out of your life. Do not stay with her, she is not right in the head and will continue to cheat on you for the rest of your life. You will require DNA tests on all your children if you stay with her. You deserve so much better than someone like her in your life. DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH HER, she will more than likely end up pregnant just to keep you. Get help friend, read up on the 180 and make that your way of life from today forward. Sorry for your pain, none of this is your fault, protect yourself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted July 15, 2013 Share Posted July 15, 2013 She is WAYYYY too immature for marriage, and obviously needs approval from guys in order to feel worthy. You should move on. Yes, it will be hard, but all this marriage is going to do is continue breaking your heart. And no, don't consider suicide. You deserve more than this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author shadow11001 Posted July 15, 2013 Author Share Posted July 15, 2013 Sry this is real. I was writing really quick and wasnt trying to get dates right. I was married in November 2010. Link to post Share on other sites
Coolit Posted July 15, 2013 Share Posted July 15, 2013 If this is real... Get a divorce, do some growing up, enjoy life and chalk t up to experience. If you really are suicidal call a hotline, tell a rlf, if you have already planned it out, go to a local emerge. Link to post Share on other sites
veryhappy Posted July 15, 2013 Share Posted July 15, 2013 She wasn't ready to get married, and she'll keep cheating if you allow it. CAn you move out? Give her 3-6 months and see if she comes begging and promising she'll be faithful. You can try again or divorce at that point. Do not become suicidal over love. She's really not worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
Zoden Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 Sry this is real. I was writing really quick and wasnt trying to get dates right. I was married in November 2010. Ok you can understand why some people (like me) would be skeptical. The details, what little we know, make this sound extra bad. Its so bad that people are like WTF? I mean she obviously wants to cuckold you. You need to leave and restart your life. Don't kill yourself-if you do then they win and you lose. Sounds like you two were too young to marry. Things to do: 1. Kick her out 2. Kick the ass of this Matt guy. 3. File divorce. You think you can work it out when she tells you she loves you and another guy and she won't end it? Its OVER Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 If this story is even real, you simply need to grow some balls and stand up for your own self interests. If this is real, I assume this gal was your first real girlfriend and deep down you feel this is your one and only shot at love and that if you lose her you will never find love again. It is this belief that you need to purge yourself of. You can find real love again some day and there is never any reason to allow people to trample on you and to mistreat you. You need to take charge of your own life and your own self interests. You should not wait for her to determine your future. You should not wait for her to choose or to make a decision on who she wants to be with because she will want to have her cake and eat it too. YOU take charge of your future and YOU decide your own fate and make your own destiny. Your options are to kick her to the curb (my vote because you guys are too young for an exclusive monogamous marriage) or you can shut down her access to all these other men and drag her into counseling and demand faithfulness out of her which quite frankly i dont think she will be capable of. Either way, you need to be proactive and make your own future and sit on your hands letting her decide your fate. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 IF this is real....still thinking bunnies....then, you need to leave, she can't have both. She's not trustworthy. She cheated on you, and you, dumbly, allowed it to continue. I can only speculate that you were afraid to lose her and here's the dig! SHE KNOWS OF YOUR FEAR!!! You got in a fight and you, wisely, removed yourself from the situation. You come back and she tells you that YOU leaving was FAR WORSE than anything that she's done to you? REALLY?!?! And she said that you should let her have and affair with one of your friends as penance? AND YOU LET HER!!!! Because, she knows your fear.....she knows that she can do whatever the hell she wants and you won't leave. Well, she won't chose you and she won't chose him. I have a great idea, how about not letting her have the power to decide your life!! How about you choose you for once! Look, sounds like you don't have kids. There's 11 billion people on this planet and you're hung up on one that treats you with such distain. Time to surprise the sh*t out of her and show her that you have a spine and you deserve better. Time to heal and move on. And if you want people to believe this story and give you some solid advice rather than advice set in skepticism, you need to come back on here and post your entire story. From beginning to end. Not a one paragraph thread starter and a one sentence follow up response. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 Also, I've been trying to make heads or tails with your paragraph. She cheated 6 months into your marriage. Putting the timeline in 2011. She stopped and six months later she cheats with Matt! Which still puts it at the tail end of 2011 to 2012. We're half way through 2013. Therefore, she's been carrying on and affair with Matt for over a year. And you want to believe that they only had sex once? You need to explain all of this. Too confusing. Link to post Share on other sites
ForeverHopeful1 Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 This is a classic "cant turn a whore into a housewife" story. Divorce her!!! What the heck are you thinking?!?!?!? I am literally shaking my head reading this story. What would you allow this behaviour for?!?!?!?! You are ACCEPTING this. You are. Kick her ass out. I would pack her crap, and leave it on Matts doorstep. He can have her!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts