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One year since D-Day #1


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May 10, 2012

One year ago right now I had no idea that my world was blowing up. One year ago, my wife and I were in the middle of the biggest and only fight we ever had up to that point in our 15 year relationship.

 

That afternoon I was showing someone at work how I can track her phone with the GPS. We had GPS tracking placed on our phone plan so we could track my grandmother who had Alzheimer’s. Little did I know that I was going to have to use it to track my WW. As I was showing my fellow employee how the GPS works, I noticed my W was not were she should be. She was in my mothers neighborhood, but not at my mothers. I continued to track her through out the day. I also noticed a GoDaddy.com charge on our credit card. I hadn’t purchased a web address in years. I texted my W to see if she made a purchase from GoDaddy.com. She replied “yes, and we need to talk later”. I replied, “that doesn’t sound good”. She did not reply.

 

I get home at my normal time and was expecting her to be home. She was not there. I tracked her phone and she was at the corner of Jog Road and 10th Ave. She would remain there for several hours. I eventually found out that she was sitting at a Spanish restaurant with her OM as he prepped her to come home and light me up like the 4th of July. He was doing what he could to convince her to leave me.

 

When she got home she lit into me about everything. From us not having children (even though her cardiologist was against her getting pregnant), to not being spontaneous enough with trips. Even though she worked long hours and Saturday’s and it was her hours that prevented us from making many weekend get away’s.

 

After several hours, she eventually went into the other room to talk on the phone with her female friend. I was sitting shell shocked in the living room. I didn’t see any of this coming. I thought we were fine. I thought we had a great relationship. Most of our friends were envious of us. What I didn’t know at that time was that while she was talking to her friend on the house phone, she was also texting the OM.

 

Later that evening I heard her tell her friend that she had been “miserable” for the past year. Again, I had no idea. I went to her and told her I was sorry I made her so miserable. I had no idea and wished she would have said something. She then asked why I was so concerned with ‘possessions”. I asked her what the h*ll she was talking about. She asked “what would happen to us if the house blew away.” Again I asked her what she was talking about. She said “what if a hurricane were to blow the house away, what would happen to us?” I told her that if a hurricane was going to blow the house away that I’m grabbing her, the cats, the important papers and pictures and getting the h*ll out of the area. Everything we have, we built together. And most of it is hand me down furniture. We can rebuild.

 

When she would say “possessions”, it was if she was above them. As if they were just meaningless objects. She would lazily wave her hand in the air as if she were shoeing away a fly when she would say it. I would later understand that the OM had trained to that opinion. The OM is a 40 year old loser that lives with his mother. Since he has nothing, he had to convince her that not having anything was actually appealing. To convince her that “possessions” were just objects, and that she doesn’t need them. She only needs his love.

 

Later on that evening her female friend came over. They went outside to talk while I tried to get some sleep. I was exhausted.

 

The next morning, which was the WW birthday, I came out of the bedroom to see her sitting in the living room. I wished her a happy birthday, actually, I phrased it like a question. I asked her if we were going to be OK or are we f*cked. She came to me and gave me a hug and told me we were going to be OK and that we can work on it. I then told her that the way she was acting that it seemed that there was someone else involved. She didn’t respond. I asked her if there was someone else. Again, she didn’t respond. Since we were still hugging, I pushed her away at arms length and told her that if she was not answering me, then that means there is someone else. She confirmed that she was “talking to someone.” After many more questions from me, I find out she is having an affair. She claims they only kissed. BOOOOM!!!! D-DAY NUMBER 1. To this day, I still don’t know for sure if that was all they did back then.

 

I immediately left the house and went to work. When I walked into work everyone could see something was wrong. I had the 1000 mile stare. My world was upside down. The woman I loved more than life, the woman I had absolute trust and faith, was seeing another man.

 

After a few hours, I went to my mothers house. By then my parents knew and so did my in-laws. A few hours later I drove by the area in my mothers neighborhood where I found my wife the day before with GPS. I found a pickup truck with a lot of racing stickers on it.

 

My W had been talking a lot about her customer at the bank that was into drag racing. She asked several times if we could go to the drag races to see her customer. He had invited her out to the race. But by the time she got home from work, we wouldn’t get there in time. So we didn’t go.

 

Then I realized, it was the drag racer that she was having the affair with. A guy that I would later find out can’t support himself. Lives with his mother. Was recently divorced because his ex-wife ‘resented’ him. And is a completely disrespectful a*shole. And she was going to start a racing business with him. Thus the GoDaddy.com purchase. She bought a domain name for the race team there were going to start.

 

These have been the longest 12 months of my life. In that time, my W has cheated twice with the dirtbag. My grandmother finally passed away the day before my 40th birthday. I thought I was going to lose my job. I will be divorced within a few weeks. I will be moving from the house that at one point I was very proud of. Now, I cant stand the sight of it. I was supposed to go on a cruise with the W and her parents. Instead, the W took her OM and the in-laws were OK with it. The W said some very awful things to me. I was starting to believe her.

 

The last 3 months have been the hardest. I’m still struggling. I’m still fighting. It’s still day to day. But I’m still here! I will not be her doormat! How dare she treat me the way she has!!! My lawyer is better than hers. I did not bend during mediation. I stood my ground. Everything I’ve done in the past 3 months has been to do exactly what she doesn’t want. I’ve taken as much control as I have. And in those moments when I lost my composure or was a complete emotional wreck, my friends and family propped me up.

 

One month from now I will be moving into a nice apartment. I’ll be out of this house. This was a dream house. Now it’s a house of nightmare memories. I’ll be divorced. I won’t have to deal with her anymore.

 

In the past 12 months, my life has completely changed. My future is completely different from what I thought. I venture on as me, not us. I deserve a better woman. I will get a better woman. Who she is and where she is, I don’t know yet. But she is looking for me as well. She just doesn’t know who I am or where I am yet either.

 

Here’s to the next 12 months being a whole lot better than the past 12 months. I need them to be.

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frozensprouts

Good for you!

 

You sound like you are looking ahead to your future with enthusiasm, and that's great:)

 

You are right...there will be someone out there who is just right for you...but, if I may give a piece of advice, give yourself time to heal from all this crud...take some time for yourself and maybe treat yourself to some things you want to do just for you...is there any hobby, activity, etc. that you have always wanted to try but never did? Now's the time! Maybe even treat yourself to an amazing vacation o something else special. Once you feel you have healed and are ready,you'll find the right lady for you.

 

best of luck to you:)

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Dear 96nole

 

Even though you have been through hell and back, you are a survivor.

You're smart, have a good sense of humor and are also compassionate, evidenced by the many supportive posts you've given to others here at LS, myself included. I see an amazing future for you.

 

You tried your best...and can always look back knowing you fought the fight.

 

Be good to yourself.

 

Hugs

 

PS....just think...no more being jolted by her thunderous farts and opening all the windows to air out her stink.

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SomedayDig

Thumbs up 96. You've definitely stood up for yourself and did what was best for YOU. Congrats!

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Snowflower

Great post, 96nole even though it was heartbreaking to read. Pretty much every BS who has been through a d-day can relate, I'm sure. It actually brought tears to my eyes which is usually pretty hard to do!:)

 

I think you are through the worst part, even if it doesn't seem like it. I think you have lived in limbo for the past year even when things seemed to be getting better. Now that is all behind you. Yes, it still hurts like h*ll and it is hard to believe that your future is not what you thought it would be (being with her).

 

I agree with frozensprouts and try to focus on doing something that you've always wanted to do but never did. Another chance at love will come for you when you are healed and ready for it.

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YellowShark

I was a wreck too. Moved out in 4 days after I caught them together. But now I realize two things, 1) I am happier without her lies and deception, and 2) she may have "dumped" me, but she dumped me into a HUGE pool of eligible women!!! ;)

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PS....just think...no more being jolted by her thunderous farts and opening all the windows to air out her stink.

 

Now that is hilarious!! And I'll admit, the bedroom does smell better at night.:laugh:

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I think you have lived in limbo for the past year even when things seemed to be getting better.

 

You know, that's a pretty good point you made there. And actually it's been a little longer than the past year. Grandma had Alzheimer's for about 8-9 years. The last couple of years were the worst. It really is an awful disease. Watching someone mentally decline like that as the brain essentially deteriorates.

 

And both the ex and I had job concerns. There were many times neither one of us were sure if we would have a job the next day.

 

I know those things also weighed on her as well. But she chickened out. She jumped ship into the arms of a lying dirtbag.

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Snowflower
You know, that's a pretty good point you made there. And actually it's been a little longer than the past year. Grandma had Alzheimer's for about 8-9 years. The last couple of years were the worst. It really is an awful disease. Watching someone mentally decline like that as the brain essentially deteriorates.

 

And both the ex and I had job concerns. There were many times neither one of us were sure if we would have a job the next day.

 

I know those things also weighed on her as well. But she chickened out. She jumped ship into the arms of a lying dirtbag.

 

I think it is really common for a spouse to have an affair after job struggles, illness/death of relatives, etc. In no way is it an excuse!

 

There is another poster here who has posted quite a bit about her H having an affair after he had been out of work for months and then once he did find a job then got in to an affair. Makes no sense!

 

Anyway, I hope you're feeling better now on the other side of D-day.

 

Your OP about how your wife just "went off" on you one night, seemingly randomly, yep, been there, done that. I remember being just so hurt and flabbergasted that my H had been so unhappy with all these things I had supposedly done wrong to hurt him. I was like, "where did this come from all the sudden?" Of course, now I know the real reason but at the time it seemed so random and painful.

 

It's like your spouse just turns on you one day (like a rabid dog, lol!).

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(((96nole)))

 

You sound like an amazing person.

You seem so strong. Everything that you went through proves that you survived and you stood your ground and you know you deserve better.

 

Don't lose sight of the kind of man you are.

 

I'm sorry for your pain, but at the same time, I'm glad that at least you guys don't have kids to messy things up more.

You were worried about your job - but you still have it, and everything turned out ok.

You're moving to a new apartment - its gonna kick some a$$ :p

You're starting a whole new chapter - and this one will be a happy one.

You're just 40 - that's young! You will find love and be with someone that deserves you.

 

Your post really touched my heart. Your pain is so clear and real and raw, but your survived - don't forget that.

 

:)

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(((96nole)))

 

You sound like an amazing person.

You seem so strong. Everything that you went through proves that you survived and you stood your ground and you know you deserve better.

 

Don't lose sight of the kind of man you are.

 

I'm sorry for your pain, but at the same time, I'm glad that at least you guys don't have kids to messy things up more.

You were worried about your job - but you still have it, and everything turned out ok.

You're moving to a new apartment - its gonna kick some a$$ :p

You're starting a whole new chapter - and this one will be a happy one.

You're just 40 - that's young! You will find love and be with someone that deserves you.

 

Your post really touched my heart. Your pain is so clear and real and raw, but your survived - don't forget that.

 

:)

 

Thank you for the kind words. I've read them several times. Tomorrow morning the STBXW (W stands for whore) is coming over to get some of her stuff. So I've been clearing out some things that I don't want something to "accidentally" happen to. I won't be here because I honestly don't want to ever see her face again. However, I'm sitting here in an even emptier house and it's bringing back some of the bad feelings. So your words have been a bit of a pick me up. Thank you

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Thank you for the kind words. I've read them several times. Tomorrow morning the STBXW (W stands for whore) is coming over to get some of her stuff. So I've been clearing out some things that I don't want something to "accidentally" happen to. I won't be here because I honestly don't want to ever see her face again. However, I'm sitting here in an even emptier house and it's bringing back some of the bad feelings. So your words have been a bit of a pick me up. Thank you

 

 

Hey 96

 

Misery loves company. Me too...having a tough day.

 

But we just have to go through it...and know as time goes by there will be better days than bad.

 

Cheers.... to hope for better days.

 

I'm eating an ice cream...double chocolate.

Get yourself one too.

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ARRRRGGHHHHH!!!!! I'll be so glad when this is over and I never have to deal with that whore or her dirtbag ever again. She came over today to get some of her belongings. The stupid thing about that is she is moving back into the house in one month. She's been out of the house for 3 months. It's not like she can't live without this stuff.

 

During mediation, it was determined which items each one can take. I took some items out of the house so she couldn't do anything to them. She was scheduled to be in the house from 10am to 3pm. I left the house at 9:30 so I didn't have to see her. I get a call from a detective that was dispatched to keep the peace. He asked if I was there and i told him no. I left the door unlocked so they can get what she is supposed to take on the court order.

 

I get home at 4pm and I see that she took the 47 inch TV in the living room. she was not supposed to take it. She even originally put it on my list of items to take. I called her up and told her she wasn't supposed to take it. The bitch then starts trying to say the TV wasn't there. I told her it was and she took it. she then asks how long I was gone before she got there. She was trying to imply that someone else must have gone into the house and took the TV. (of course they didn't take anything else) I got a little loud and told her to not even try to imply that someone else took it. She told me not to yell at her. I told her I was going to yell if I want. She then put the dirtbag on the phone and he and I started screaming at each other. I won't bother trying to post the screaming match, there was entirely too much profanity.

 

So i called the sheriffs office and reported the stolen TV. As I was on the phone, my mom texted the ex to tell her I was calling the police and filing a report.

 

A little later the ex called to tell me she was going to file a report on me. She's saying I stole items, put holes in the walls of "her" house and that I damaged the TV out in the screen room ( the TV she was supposed to take) It's not 'her' house yet. I didn't steal anything. And the TV in the screen room works just fine. in fact, I took a picture of the TV with it on and working and sent it to her with the caption "it looks like the tv works just fine"

 

When the deputy showed up. He took the report. I even showed him the TV in the screen room working.

 

It's amazing what a lying trashy piece of sh*t she has become. I wish I could go back in time and stop myself from calling 911 all those times.

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ARRRRGGHHHHH!!!!! I'll be so glad when this is over and I never have to deal with that whore or her dirtbag ever again. She came over today to get some of her belongings. The stupid thing about that is she is moving back into the house in one month. She's been out of the house for 3 months. It's not like she can't live without this stuff.

 

During mediation, it was determined which items each one can take. I took some items out of the house so she couldn't do anything to them. She was scheduled to be in the house from 10am to 3pm. I left the house at 9:30 so I didn't have to see her. I get a call from a detective that was dispatched to keep the peace. He asked if I was there and i told him no. I left the door unlocked so they can get what she is supposed to take on the court order.

 

I get home at 4pm and I see that she took the 47 inch TV in the living room. she was not supposed to take it. She even originally put it on my list of items to take. I called her up and told her she wasn't supposed to take it. The bitch then starts trying to say the TV wasn't there. I told her it was and she took it. she then asks how long I was gone before she got there. She was trying to imply that someone else must have gone into the house and took the TV. (of course they didn't take anything else) I got a little loud and told her to not even try to imply that someone else took it. She told me not to yell at her. I told her I was going to yell if I want. She then put the dirtbag on the phone and he and I started screaming at each other. I won't bother trying to post the screaming match, there was entirely too much profanity.

 

So i called the sheriffs office and reported the stolen TV. As I was on the phone, my mom texted the ex to tell her I was calling the police and filing a report.

 

A little later the ex called to tell me she was going to file a report on me. She's saying I stole items, put holes in the walls of "her" house and that I damaged the TV out in the screen room ( the TV she was supposed to take) It's not 'her' house yet. I didn't steal anything. And the TV in the screen room works just fine. in fact, I took a picture of the TV with it on and working and sent it to her with the caption "it looks like the tv works just fine"

 

When the deputy showed up. He took the report. I even showed him the TV in the screen room working.

 

It's amazing what a lying trashy piece of sh*t she has become. I wish I could go back in time and stop myself from calling 911 all those times.

 

I don't know if its the way you write or what - but I so feel your frustration and can only imagine what you're going through.

 

FU**! I so would like to just grab that 47' tv and just smash it over her head. what a piece of trash she is.

 

UGH!!

I know you must be thinking "how the heck did I ever marry that?"

I'm so sorry you're going through all that - now its not just the infidelity and the betrayal, but its just having to deal with her stupid, trashy ways.

 

What a c**t. :mad:

 

I'm so sending you happy thoughts.

I can't wait till you're done with her filth and you move to your apartment, have some peace, never see her again, move on to much much better things in life.

 

Sucks that it has to come to all that at the end , but you can get through this.

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The Blue Knight

In the past 12 months, my life has completely changed. My future is completely different from what I thought. I venture on as me, not us. I deserve a better woman. I will get a better woman. Who she is and where she is, I don’t know yet. But she is looking for me as well. She just doesn’t know who I am or where I am yet either.

 

Here’s to the next 12 months being a whole lot better than the past 12 months. I need them to be.

Thanks for sharing that 96. I do feel for you. Been there, and it sucks. :(

 

You've got the right attitude. I was somewhat amazed that your ex-wife's relatives just went on a cruise with this loser. What does that say for them? I don't get that, but then . . . who knows? Perhaps she spun you as some diabolical form of evil and they bought it.

 

As we discussed previously, the cheating spouse has to create a whole host of "negatives" regarding the betrayed spouse, and of course then they have to rewrite the entire marriage history as well to justify their actions. :mad:

 

But there is a life waiting for you after your ex-wife. The hardest thing for you may be simply finding the ability to trust again, and that's so vital to a successful relationship. What I got was a much better spouse and we've been married 15 years. I'm much happier. She's a much more attentive and loving wife. So get out there as soon as this is finalized and find yourself a decent gal. :)

 

You're ex-wife I believe will someday look back and wonder what she was thinking when she realizes this guy isn't everything she thinks he is. Or perhaps he'll find another woman to latch onto at the race circuit leaving her out in the cold. We can only hope! :)

 

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The Blue Knight
Thank you for the kind words. I've read them several times. Tomorrow morning the STBXW (W stands for whore) is coming over to get some of her stuff. So I've been clearing out some things that I don't want something to "accidentally" happen to. I won't be here because I honestly don't want to ever see her face again. However, I'm sitting here in an even emptier house and it's bringing back some of the bad feelings. So your words have been a bit of a pick me up. Thank you

 

Soon you'll be in a new domain where all memories of her will begin to fade. :)

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The Blue Knight
ARRRRGGHHHHH!!!!! I'll be so glad when this is over and I never have to deal with that whore or her dirtbag ever again. She came over today to get some of her belongings. The stupid thing about that is she is moving back into the house in one month. She's been out of the house for 3 months. It's not like she can't live without this stuff.

 

During mediation, it was determined which items each one can take. I took some items out of the house so she couldn't do anything to them. She was scheduled to be in the house from 10am to 3pm. I left the house at 9:30 so I didn't have to see her. I get a call from a detective that was dispatched to keep the peace. He asked if I was there and i told him no. I left the door unlocked so they can get what she is supposed to take on the court order.

 

I get home at 4pm and I see that she took the 47 inch TV in the living room. she was not supposed to take it. She even originally put it on my list of items to take. I called her up and told her she wasn't supposed to take it. The bitch then starts trying to say the TV wasn't there. I told her it was and she took it. she then asks how long I was gone before she got there. She was trying to imply that someone else must have gone into the house and took the TV. (of course they didn't take anything else) I got a little loud and told her to not even try to imply that someone else took it. She told me not to yell at her. I told her I was going to yell if I want. She then put the dirtbag on the phone and he and I started screaming at each other. I won't bother trying to post the screaming match, there was entirely too much profanity.

 

So i called the sheriffs office and reported the stolen TV. As I was on the phone, my mom texted the ex to tell her I was calling the police and filing a report.

 

A little later the ex called to tell me she was going to file a report on me. She's saying I stole items, put holes in the walls of "her" house and that I damaged the TV out in the screen room ( the TV she was supposed to take) It's not 'her' house yet. I didn't steal anything. And the TV in the screen room works just fine. in fact, I took a picture of the TV with it on and working and sent it to her with the caption "it looks like the tv works just fine"

 

When the deputy showed up. He took the report. I even showed him the TV in the screen room working.

 

It's amazing what a lying trashy piece of sh*t she has become. I wish I could go back in time and stop myself from calling 911 all those times.

96, I do understand why you left (not wanting to cast your eyes upon her) but for the very reason you posted here (missing TV) it's good to stick around. I advise people who occupy the house to monitor what's being taken when we do a stand-by as property is being removed.

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The Blue Knight
I don't know if its the way you write or what - but I so feel your frustration and can only imagine what you're going through.

 

FU**! I so would like to just grab that 47' tv and just smash it over her head. what a piece of trash she is.

 

UGH!!

I know you must be thinking "how the heck did I ever marry that?"

I'm so sorry you're going through all that - now its not just the infidelity and the betrayal, but its just having to deal with her stupid, trashy ways.

 

What a c**t. :mad:

 

I'm so sending you happy thoughts.

I can't wait till you're done with her filth and you move to your apartment, have some peace, never see her again, move on to much much better things in life.

 

Sucks that it has to come to all that at the end , but you can get through this.

TigerCub, you're a little bit animated in this posting! :eek:

96, I'm sure you've already thought this one through, but you're very blessed not to have kids with this woman. :) That means, no ties after this divorce is completed . . . no child support . . . no kids being exposed to the dirtball boyfriend. You do have a lot to be thankful for. :)

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96, I do understand why you left (not wanting to cast your eyes upon her) but for the very reason you posted here (missing TV) it's good to stick around. I advise people who occupy the house to monitor what's being taken when we do a stand-by as property is being removed.

 

At this point she can keep the TV. She's now claiming that I've stolen some of her items. Her lawyer sent a fax to mine claiming that I've stolen some of her stuff, let the house in such disrepair that it is now "infested" with ants and roaches. And that I've been punching holes in the walls.

 

I see now that it has been a non stop year of lies and deception. All these actions of hers is making it easier for me. A few months ago, if there was a gun in the house, I may have pulled the trigger. OK most likely I wouldn't have. But I was very down and depressed because I thought I was losing someone else. That someone else has been long gone.

 

When this is done I'll send her a message stating that I hope I never see or talk to her again. I'm sure I'll run into her at some point. But that I will simply walk by as if I never met her before.

 

It does suck that this is what it has become. But she is the one who has become very trashy because of the dirtbag she is with.

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TigerCub, you're a little bit animated in this posting! :eek:

96, I'm sure you've already thought this one through, but you're very blessed not to have kids with this woman. :) That means, no ties after this divorce is completed . . . no child support . . . no kids being exposed to the dirtball boyfriend. You do have a lot to be thankful for. :)

 

I'm very thankful for it. At one point I was regretting that we didn't. I was thinking that perhaps that is a main reason for her cheating. But as I look back over the past year, I'm glad we don't have kids. I wouldn't want someone like her to be the mother of my children. Even our sister in law (woman married to the ex's brother) doesn't think the ex would be a good mother.

 

I'm thankful that it will be a clean break. As much as it hurts now, I couldn't imaging still having to deal with that woman over the next 5, 10, 20 years.

 

Next month can't come soon enough.

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frozensprouts

she says that you are punching a lot of holes in the walls, stealing her stuff and letting bugs in the house?

:lmao:

she must think you have as much free time on your hands as the guy she's seeing...

 

i don't understand her bitterness. after all, she's the one who cheated on you. you tried your best to make things better, but it wasn't enough for her. if she had any kins of "class", she'd admit things were over and allow the divorce to go through smoothly and not turn it into a cross between Jerry Spring and Judge Judy.

 

Don't worry...she'll get hers in the end. Someday she'll realize that she gave up a really great guy ( you) and that she totally messed up her life. Hopefully, by then you'll be at the place in your life when she just won't matter anymore.

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TigerCub, you're a little bit animated in this posting! :eek:

 

I couldn't help it :o

Her actions angered me so much.

Isn't it enough what she's done to him, but to sink even lower and just try these silly trashy antics - Gosh! I would so want to do somethin illegal to her if it were me, and I'm so glad that 96 is a lot more rational and mature.

96, I'm sure you've already thought this one through, but you're very blessed not to have kids with this woman. :) That means, no ties after this divorce is completed . . . no child support . . . no kids being exposed to the dirtball boyfriend. You do have a lot to be thankful for. :)

So true!! :)

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The Blue Knight
At this point she can keep the TV. She's now claiming that I've stolen some of her items. Her lawyer sent a fax to mine claiming that I've stolen some of her stuff, let the house in such disrepair that it is now "infested" with ants and roaches. And that I've been punching holes in the walls.

 

I see now that it has been a non stop year of lies and deception. All these actions of hers is making it easier for me. A few months ago, if there was a gun in the house, I may have pulled the trigger. OK most likely I wouldn't have. But I was very down and depressed because I thought I was losing someone else. That someone else has been long gone.

 

When this is done I'll send her a message stating that I hope I never see or talk to her again. I'm sure I'll run into her at some point. But that I will simply walk by as if I never met her before.

 

It does suck that this is what it has become. But she is the one who has become very trashy because of the dirtbag she is with.

Essentially they are not the same person. :eek: Their values change the minute that they enter into the affair and therefore, many other attitude changes occur as well. Plus, it sounds like her cheerleader parasite of a boyfriend is probably chiding in with his two cents which doesn't help.

 

The fighting over "pots and pans" just makes the lawyers that much richer and you guys just come out on the short end of things.

 

Save your energy. For what you're paying your attorney in one hour you can probably replace the TV easy enough.

 

 

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The Blue Knight

i don't understand her bitterness. after all, she's the one who cheated on you. you tried your best to make things better, but it wasn't enough for her. if she had any kins of "class", she'd admit things were over and allow the divorce to go through smoothly and not turn it into a cross between Jerry Spring and Judge Judy.

Perception vs. Reality . . . It's all about making the other person seem bad enough that you can justify screwing the other man as well as all the evil acts you dump on the betrayed spouse.

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she says that you are punching a lot of holes in the walls, stealing her stuff and letting bugs in the house?

:lmao:

she must think you have as much free time on your hands as the guy she's seeing...

 

i don't understand her bitterness. after all, she's the one who cheated on you. you tried your best to make things better, but it wasn't enough for her. if she had any kins of "class", she'd admit things were over and allow the divorce to go through smoothly and not turn it into a cross between Jerry Spring and Judge Judy.

 

Don't worry...she'll get hers in the end. Someday she'll realize that she gave up a really great guy ( you) and that she totally messed up her life. Hopefully, by then you'll be at the place in your life when she just won't matter anymore.

 

We are in South Florida, you can't stop the little ants in the house, you can only hope to contain them. There was one dead roach on the floor. I'm guessing it was under the corner shelf she took. The self was in the same spot for 7 years.

 

There is a new hole in the wall of the closet. She had a shoe box of stuff on the self. I took it down to see what was in there. The top came off and the pictures started falling out. Out of reaction, I threw my hands up to catch it. My left hand hit the wall and made a hole.(yes, my hand hurt for a few days) There is even a mark on the wall from the box scraping along the wall. The hole is in the walk-in closet of the master bedroom behind where the door opens. You have to be standing in the closet with the door closed to see it. Also, the medicine cabinet is on the other side of the wall. When it happened I thought I broke the glass mirror of the cabinet. Luckily it didn't. If I'm going to put holes in the wall to make a statement, I'll do it somewhere more obvious. And certainly not where there is a glass mirror just a few inches away.

 

Her bitterness is that she is mad.

-She's mad that I've thrown her out of the house twice this year.

-Mad that I threw her out the second time before she was ready to make her 'move' or what ever she may have been planning.

-Mad that I had her served with divorce papers at her work in front of her boss.

-Mad that I didn't make it a quiet divorce like SHE wanted

-Mad that the divorce papers show she was hiding money, having an extramarital affair and spending money on the dirtbag. Giving the cruise as an example. None of those are good things to have public record when you work for a bank.

-Mad that I won't retract those statements from the divorce papers

-Mad that mediation didn't go her way.

-Mad that she has to give me 40% of her 401K.

-Mad that everyone knows what kind of person she has become

-Mad that I didn't stay her doormat and do everything the way she wanted it.

-Mad that every time she tried to control the situation, I didn't let her. An example was when she told me yesterday that I didn't have to yell at her. She tried to control me. I told her that I was going to yell. That's when she put the dirtbag on the phone and the screaming match began.

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