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Sex in sickness and in health


Marriage & Life Partnerships Debunking the old-ball-and-chain stereotype one couple at a time.

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Old 27th December 2017, 12:13 PM   #31
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We agreed at the beginning of our relationship - long before any illness or injury occurred that could prevent or severely limit sex for an extended period - that in such circumstances we'd allow an open relationship after a few months, no further permission required, no questions asked, and no later recriminations.

As long as you agree to the rules.

Honestly for me - if I developed something severe -- like a devastating stroke with permanent damage, or Alzheimer or dementia - I would not blame my wife from seeking some friendly kind part time comfort, as long as she still stayed mostly present with me and loved me.

but it would have to be something very severe and long term. Not just me in a wheel chair.
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Old 27th December 2017, 1:23 PM   #32
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Well, I didn't actually go off sex at any point during my cancer treatment
Why not ???

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Old 27th December 2017, 4:27 PM   #33
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Why not ???

Mr. Lucky

I think my hormones hadn't shut down completely then. And also my ex never made me feel inhuman, despite my feeling it about myself. It helped that he wasn't squeamish about vomit and bodily fluids.

We had sex a month after my most major surgery. In the dark, and with me bandaged and partially dressed. But that was very early. Most people take much longer after the surgery I had.

I was so lucky to have him then. I don't think I'd have got thru without him.
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Old 27th December 2017, 4:45 PM   #34
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HeartBrokenLady,

My GF at the time had no change in her desire for me either. She was a trooper.
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Old 27th December 2017, 5:09 PM   #35
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I think my hormones hadn't shut down completely then. And also my ex never made me feel inhuman, despite my feeling it about myself. It helped that he wasn't squeamish about vomit and bodily fluids.

We had sex a month after my most major surgery. In the dark, and with me bandaged and partially dressed. But that was very early. Most people take much longer after the surgery I had.

I was so lucky to have him then. I don't think I'd have got thru without him.
Seems you both understood (perhaps instinctively) the importance of maintaining that connection. Not sure why so many want to discount its value and contribution...

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Old 27th December 2017, 6:01 PM   #36
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Seems you both understood (perhaps instinctively) the importance of maintaining that connection. Not sure why so many want to discount its value and contribution...

Mr. Lucky

I don't even think it was that. I think at the time we were just horny people.

It wasn't the sex that bonded us, it was facing a life threatening illness together. He held me down, during chemo. He saw me, bald, bloated, on the toilet, vomiting and still loved me. What a man, to still love me, thru that.
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