I don't know where else to go?

[Sara lou]

Hi I'm 28 and currently dating this guy for about a year and a half.

Long story short, I'm from outside of country I came to the states with fiance visa (90 days visa, might one of you have watched the show) I was with my ex husband, dating as gf and bf for 2 years and we decided to get married so he invited me to the US. it didn't go well at all, he lied to me he never took me to his house (but we did get married for a month) I thought things would changed after being his legal wife but it didn't, and I found out he has another woman. I moved from hotel to hotel, rent a room from one place to another until I was sick and tired of it, and I called the cops. I was so afraid as a foreigner but I don't think its fair to be treated like this. And then I met this guy, he was nice and polite, I kinda knew he liked me but I was married (he was one of my neighbors as I always moved). Then I told him I was married and I needed help because I don't feel safe. Then he took me to his mother, they helped me find the police, get a therapist, etc. I decided to divorce him and he threatened me a, b, c. I'm not afraid because I never do anything illegal, after 6months of battle we finally divorced and I have restraining order.

So that guy and I were getting closer and closer, I feel so safe and loved with him. I already gave up everything in my country to come and get married to my ex, my job my house literally everything.

Because of the status of me is a victim ? then I have a few months financial aids to get a room until I got a work visa (which I got after 3months) I decided to stay in his house (his mom and little sister live with him) and pay my rent to them to thank them for helping me out. And they need it help too, so we help each other.

Then I got a job, it's not great but better than zero. I got minimum paid but I'm grateful that I'm safe and doesn't have to move here and there.

I sold my diamond ring, in order to put as a down payment for a car and my other stuff as I only came with 2 suitcases. But my bf car's got towed as he didn't pay for 3 months. So I helped him out. Then he needed help for pg&e and this and that. I understand because I live there too but I don't make enough, and I can't save money for a car if I keep helping them. Also, the house is always dirty so I decided to stay in my room never be in the living room hoping that his mom would feel bad because I work fulltime and tired and I have to come home to a dirty house.

I don't think I'm happy with him plus I never wanted to have a relationship with somebody who already has kid (my bf has a son with his ex gf). But the other hand I don't know where else to go as my money spent for helping him and his mom. I don't think I want to be with him.

He's nice but he needs to take care of his family (I guess)

[elaine567]

You need to stop helping him out financially.

Pay him an agreed rent instead and start looking for a new job, a new room and make plans to leave.

[preraph]

You'll have to grit your teeth long enough to save up some money to move out, and you should start looking for a female roommate or roommate situation while you're doing that. You are in a bad position and I hate to tell you to sit still, but save every bit of your money that you can. And one thing that will help with making the time go quicker with less contact with him and his mom is if you take a second job -- any old job, waitress, retail on the weekend, whatever. It will be extra money and get you out of there quicker. If it would be cheaper for you to find a motel by the week than pay the mother, do that. Depends where you are. But get on roommates.com or whatever roommate app is popular, and you might just find someone you can move in with immediately for your part of the rent. Good luck.

[Sara lou]

Thank you everyone I feel so much better now.