truncated Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 The idea for this thread came form another, but I didn't want to hijack it. Please, be respectful of people's answers. If you are married or in a long term relationship, was there ever a time that you didn't want to have sex with your spouse. If so, why? Had you had a high sex drive before and it changed, or were you always a low drive person? What was the eventual outcome of the situation? Personally, in my experience, someone's sex drive can ebb and flow, depending on what is going on in their life. Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 I've always been a low drive person, but major medical problems have made it much worse. I always make an effort to make sure my husband has regular sex. I think the "ebb and flow" depends on the person too. I have never wanted sex if I am sick, stressed, etc. but my husband can have the flu or be dealing with major life problems, and his desire for sex never goes away. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 I think the "ebb and flow" depends on the person too. ^ ^ ^ THIS ^ ^ ^ There have been times in my 50-year life when I have wanted it two or three times a day and times (in my early 30s and my late 40s) when I was happy only having sex every few months (in my mid-20s and my late 30s). I am now 18 months into a marriage and the stress of a suicidal teenage stepdaughter has ebbed my sex drive. I make sure my husband is kept satisfied, but I haven't had an orgasm in several months and - frankly - I don't really care, although he is very concerned that I am not satisfied. Link to post Share on other sites
Syberia Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 The idea for this thread came form another, but I didn't want to hijack it. Please, be respectful of people's answers. If you are married or in a long term relationship, was there ever a time that you didn't want to have sex with your spouse. If so, why? Yes. The reason was that I had become addicted to porn. I subconsciously started to ignore her attempts to initiate sex, and after enough times being turned down, she stopped trying. Which I then rationalized to myself as something married couples do - stop having sex. Thus, turning to more porn. Had you had a high sex drive before and it changed, or were you always a low drive person? I remained a high drive person. Just not with my wife. I "consumed" porn 4-5 times a day at one point. What was the eventual outcome of the situation? I became unhappy in my marriage. Ended up finding this site. Lurked for a while. Realized that sexless marriages are not the norm. I just "snapped out of it." We've probably had more sex in the past month than in the past year. We've reconnected as lovers again and I feel happier with her than I have in a long time. I had never realized how damaging to my relationship this was, or what I had been depriving myself of. Personally, in my experience, someone's sex drive can ebb and flow, depending on what is going on in their life. I answered within the quote. I'll type a mandatory 10 characters, though. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Soxfaninfl Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 The idea for this thread came form another, but I didn't want to hijack it. Please, be respectful of people's answers. If you are married or in a long term relationship, was there ever a time that you didn't want to have sex with your spouse. If so, why? I've never not wanted sex in my 39 years. I've had a high sex drive my entire life. It's a curse when your with someone that doesn't. I wish I could lower my sex drive some how. I'm currently in that situation right now and it's very frustrating. Had you had a high sex drive before and it changed, or were you always a low drive person? It's always been high even in the worst times in my life. It's how I relieve stress too. Personally, in my experience, someone's sex drive can ebb and flow, depending on what is going on in their life. That is not the case for me. I wish it were so. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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