Theleogirl84 Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 Hello l am in love with my husband and vise versa however I think that I am addicted to sex. I try to tell my husband how bad it is but I don't think he understands. I always hear people saying that men want sex all the time but I wish my husband did. I know he's not cheating or anything I just can't get enough. Any suggestions? Link to post Share on other sites
MJJean Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 How old are you both? What kind of physical shape is he in? Any medications? Does he exercise, work out and eat a good diet? Does he get enough sleep? How stressed is he? There are a lot of things that can be the cause of him having a lower sex drive. More info would help. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Theleogirl84 Posted January 23, 2015 Author Share Posted January 23, 2015 I'm 30 and he is 35. He just started working out again. He just doesn't stay motivated enough to keep up at it. I am afraid that it's just gonna get worst Link to post Share on other sites
Author Theleogirl84 Posted January 23, 2015 Author Share Posted January 23, 2015 No medications, we both have pretty good physics Link to post Share on other sites
BeatsByDirk Posted January 24, 2015 Share Posted January 24, 2015 I hate to say it but you need to be direct with him. It's a fine line because the natural reaction from him could be either: 1) she finds me inadequate? 2) did I marry a nympho, is she gonna end up cheating on me? Both are unhealthy over-reactions that take what you are trying to say about yourself and his needs and make it about him and what he's not doing so tact is important! If you guys think therapy is doable and a tool to improve relationships and not just fix problems then I would suggest that. Find a solution, be open and honest, consider unconventional solutions when conventional solutions are exhausted. I don't know if it's about disinterest or just a lack of initiation but rarely initiate but am ready for 6 days a week but I find after a few thousand romps I'm not as excited as I was at the beginning. I think men get a little more excited for variety... Comfort with ones partner isn't really a turn on Link to post Share on other sites
MJJean Posted January 24, 2015 Share Posted January 24, 2015 I'm 30 and he is 35. He just started working out again. He just doesn't stay motivated enough to keep up at it. I am afraid that it's just gonna get worst No medications, we both have pretty good physics Ok, you're close to me and my husband in age. We're both 39, so not too much older. It's natural for interest in sex to decline some with age, but if it's a problem there are things that can be done. Get him in for a full medical work-up and tell the doctor you're looking for possible causes of low libido. He could be developing any number of health conditions that interfere with sex drive like depression, high blood pressure, diabetes, hormone imbalance, etc. etc. A lot of men begin having problems near his age and aren't aware of it. If there is nothing found at the doctors office, try having him or both of you see a counselor. It might be psychological or simply him being unable to communicate or being unaware of his feelings, wants, needs, desires. Link to post Share on other sites
loveboid Posted January 24, 2015 Share Posted January 24, 2015 (edited) Sorry IMO, this isn't going to change and this is how it is. If you stay with him accept being frustrated or find some other way to satisfy yourself. If you want sex leave him now and save both of you lost time and frustration. I vote for leave now but going by these forums that doesn't seem likely to me! I am taking a guess and saying I am going to see you back here in a few years, possibly in an affair! Edited January 24, 2015 by loveboid clarity Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I think that I am addicted to sex. How were you in relationships prior to this one? How often do you have sex? And what frequency would meet your needs and expectations? Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
spanz1 Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 Hello l am in love with my husband and vise versa however I think that I am addicted to sex. .... Any suggestions? sure, there are a ton of things to try. online sex can be pretty good. get some sex toys, find some sex chat rooms or cam rooms, and have online sex. especially have sex just before your hubby comes home, get a few orgasms out of the way and get your body ready for him, then as he walks in the door, get one final orgasm from him. you should be satisfied for a while that way. another thing you can try is join a gym and work out every day. a lot of that sexual tension can be relieved by lifting iron, or punching/kicking a heavy bag with intensity. Just, be aware that you might start having thoughts of taking on other lovers...and might be very tempted by that. You should be very open with your husband about such thoughts, and ONLY act on them if you have permission from him. Being open with him on your fantasy life and horniness will be a good way to convince him that you need all of the sexual attention he can muster. Link to post Share on other sites
Priv Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 OP identifies as a possible sex addict and her husband gets made out to be the one with something wrong with him biologically or psychologically... *bangs head on wall* You said he doesn't seem to understand. Maybe try to find a way to make him understand by having a very clear discussion about it. Also try to not make this about him. Besides that, there are loads of ways to get off. And if you are truly a sex addict get counselling. It is quite treatable. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 OP identifies as a possible sex addict and her husband gets made out to be the one with something wrong with him biologically or psychologically... *bangs head on wall* You said he doesn't seem to understand. Maybe try to find a way to make him understand by having a very clear discussion about it. Also try to not make this about him. Besides that, there are loads of ways to get off. And if you are truly a sex addict get counselling. It is quite treatable. I agree with this. OP needs to identify what a reasonable amount of sex is compared to what she wants. If she's wanting it 5 times a day while he wants it maybe 2-3 times a week, I don't think there is an issue with him. 5 times a day isn't reasonable for most people who lead busy lives. However, if he never wants sex, that is something else entirely. Link to post Share on other sites
tobrieornottobrie Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 Would you and your husband be open to the idea of some marital counseling? Maybe having a professional to talk to would be helpful for both of you. Wishing you luck. the brie's cheese knees Link to post Share on other sites
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