goodman91 Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 Hello. This is my first ever thread! I need help and or advice folks. I am have been married for 12years. We have 3 beautiful boys. They are the light of my life. My wife and I have been to counseling in the past. First off. I love my wife. I adore the ground she walks on. I really go overboard as some say. I do most of the chores in the house. Wait on her hand and foot. My wife is angry with me a lot and very short and abrasive. Our sex life is horrible. Maybe once a month, if i'm lucky. Even when we have a chance to, it never works out. Which some are valid, (tired, headache, not feeling well) I give her hugs kisses tell her how beautiful she is everyday. I am naturally a very affectionate person and feel like I need the same. She doesn't like when I look at her naked anymore. She barely wants to have a conversation with me. The only time she has happiness in her voice is when she is at work or leaving for work. I feel like I am the perfect husband. I sit and cry a lot about they way she treats me. But with all this she still says she loves me. I am the type to say, If you love me show me. I don't want dinner cooked, laundry or shopping done. All I ask is to feel like I matter. I don't want to give up yet. I have tried in the past to talk about the situation. But nothing has changed. Looking for advice. I feel like she wants me gone but enjoys the convenience of having someone to help out around the house. Link to post Share on other sites
Rainbowlove Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 Let me ask you this...what do you love about your wife? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 It sounds as if the harder you try, the more displeased and unhappy with you she gets. Is that an accurate assessment? Perhaps you should disengage from always trying to get her approval or please her. Focus instead on your hobbies and things that bring you joy. I'm not saying that you stop being a great husband or father. Continue to contribute to household chores and maintenance. But focus too on becoming you're own person with your own interests, separate from your wife. You're always there, and she's taking you for granted. A little space might prove beneficial. Are there hobbies or things that you like to do? Maybe join a running club? Or work out at the gym? Or join a sports league one night a week? Do something that brings a sense of personal accomplishment outside the home. (Ideally something that also improves your appearance.) Another go at marriage counseling might also be helpful. You sound like a great guy who's heart is in the right place. Best of luck! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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