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I want to watch my wife have sex with other men.


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Hello,

 

I am 47 and my wife is 36. She and I have been together for 5 years. We're happilly married and life in general is great. Getting right to my point ... I have this strong desire to watch my wife have sex with other men and then have her myself afterwards. She knows how I feel but doesn't have a strong desire to fulfill my fantasy. Two years ago before we were married, she took the summer off and worked in Florida. I gave her my permission to take care of her sexual needs any way she wanted including doing other guys. Her response was, "Yeah, right." I continued to suggest it to her before she left and only asked that she told me all the details. Well, after 2 weeks of being in Florida, she met a guy at a club that she found very hot. 2 nights later she screwed him and called me to tell me. I was in sexual heaven. She did him again 2 nights later and then just about every other night for 2 months. Each time, she would call me and tell me how he would cum in her at night and then again in the morning. She became his little slut. Anyway, all the fun came to an end when she came home. I still like getting her to tell me about things that happened while there but she doesn't like to bring it up. Now I want her to meet a local guy and bring him home for sex. I can't seem to get her interested though. I don't want this to be a nightly thing or anything. Maybe once a month or so. She is seriously in love with me and I have no fear of her running off with another guy. Sometimes I think I'm some sort of sicko but the image of watching her get pounded in bed is just locked in my head and makes me soooo horny. Wouldn't you think that most wives would love to have an arrangement like this? Oh, by the way. I have no interest in having sex with any other women myself and she knows that.

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maybe you are actually fatasizing of some type of out of body experience. Kind of like watching yourself with her as you would in a dream sometimes.

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If she's not into it then don't pressure her. I would suggest that maybe you ask her if she would like to make a video with you or something.

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How could you ShareHer! I think its time sunshine to stop dressing up in your Superman suit and grow up.

I dont think you respect your wife, but just think of her as a sex toy to get your rocks off with.

 

Jack :p

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It is obvious there is a relationship problem here. A man (!!!?????) asking his wife to do something she is not interested in. This is abuse at it's best. This is the worst kind of emotional abuse ever. It will eventually lead her to total devastation. Marriage is about security and satisfaction. Women are not sex toys. This poor wife has self-respect and high self-esteem. Leave her and LEAVE. That may be better for both of you. You may find your match very soon somewhere else.

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Originally posted by ShareHer

Wouldn't you think that most wives would love to have an arrangement like this?

 

Uh, no, I don't, is the answer to that question.

 

Sexual fantasy is great, but there needs to be some consideration for the emotional needs of your marital relationship. I'm only speaking for myself, but I know I want to feel treasured by my husband. I don't think I would feel that if he wanted to see me get "pounded" by some other guy.

 

I think, if you love your wife, you are going to have to let go of having this fantasy become a reality. She is not interested in doing it, and you need to understand that. Perhaps the 2 of you could compromise on some way to introduce this fantasy more into sex between the 2 of you.

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I can understand this because I too have this fantasy about my wife.

 

I want to watch her have sex with another guy, or preferably with 2 or more guys at the same time.

 

She also has a fantasy of having 2 or 3 guys do her at the same time.

 

Early in our relationship we actually seriously looked for a guy to have a threesome with; but it never went down. We didn't want a friend and we feared picking up a stranger.

 

We settled for a dildo as the "other man" and often used it to simulate a threesome.

 

----

 

Why do I have these thoughts? I feel it's because I want to degrade my wife. The thought of 2 or more men holding my wife down and plugging every orifice for then selfish horny pleasure arouses me.

My wife is very dominate in our household and earns more money then I.

Having her be a slutty sex slave puts her down and makes me hate myself less.

 

I'm twisted I know.

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I guess I'll never understand why or how men can desire watching the part of his wife which belongs to him being taken by another man. It would literally kill me!!! Isn't it weird how love and hate gives you the same gut feeling? The heart pounding, the twitter in your stomach.....How could anyone watch his wife take pleasure with another man?

 

My Brother-in-law, deacon of our church, holier than thou type individual has the same fantasy. Only his wife has a fantasy of being with my wife.......something that we've talked about allowing to happen. Only I see it as a form of cheating and a part of her I'm not willing to share with man or woman.

 

If you allow this to happen, you give up the only thing that should be sacred to you......a man who has nothing sacred is like living with no purpose.

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Wouldn't you think that most wives would love to have an arrangement like this?

 

Uh, no. :sick:

 

Besides the fact that I would only want to sleep with my husband, if my husband wanted to whore me out to other men I would feel that he certainly did NOT love me.

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FolderWife

Ironically, my favorite fantasy is of watching my husband have sex with a busty blond...I'd divorce him in a SECOND if he ever did it though :mad:

 

I think there's something wrong with you. Seek councelling...most men would be THRILLED to have a wife that wants to be monogomous.

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ShareHer,

 

I know you think this behavior is totally fine and wonderful, but maybe you should really think about why you want your wife to do this. It's not good. It's not normal. It's not healthy.

 

Also, I really think that your wife is going to start doubting your love for her if you keep pushing her. I know that you say you're not forcing her, but you ARE pushing her to do something she really doesn't want to do, and that will make her resent you and become annoyed, etc... It's just the truth.

 

You came here trying to get help to get your wife laid by another man. We are telling you that you have the problem, not her. You should work on why you want her to do this, instead of trying to work on why she doesn't want to.

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If I were your wife, I'd want a man to want me and ONLY me over one like you. I'd dump the man that asked me to be with another man. That's just my opinion, sorry.

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Definately look into swinger sites or boards. Perhaps literotica.com's forums might help. Personally I think you're nuts but different strokes for different folks... I wouldn't push your wife into this though as that will lead to major issues so be careful what you wish for...

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From experience with this matter, I wouldnt recommend it. I felt pushed into it by my husband and his pre-occupation with this and other adult activities eventually led to our divorce. Your wife, will not be your wife for long if you asks her to do something that she does not want, and also asking her will make her feel as though she does not satisfy you, so you better be careful.

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I'm sorry but your post seems to me more like a bragging post than anything. You say though, that your wife doesn't share your excitement level about her doing other men, hmmm gee I wonder why? maybe because she feels its wrong! I know you say she has done it before, I think maybe the only reason was to please you, not really because she truely wanted too. She doesn't share your desire about it because she doesn't like it. Don't tell me that if she didn't like it she wouldn't be doing it either, because shes doing it for you. Also I'm sorry but i have a feeling that your marriage is about to go down the tubes right before your face. Are you willing to let that happen? Not only that but you say you were being sarcastic and mimicking others post or respones, that just shows you don't like what people have to say. What do you want from your post anyway? Do you want people to tell you how to go about getting her to share your desire and excitement about doing other people? I doubt that will happen.

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Originally posted by Moose

It's your preference to let your wife share that part of herself with others,.... fine, you have that right. The majority of women prefer not to, so my answer would be hell no that's not an arrangement women would want. Especially if they're married.

 

There ya go. You answered the question. Good job, only I don't know that you can speak for the majority of women.

 

 

Why are you even married? I've always believed that a marriage meant that you keep yourself for your spouse and not share.

 

Why are we married? We're married because we choose to be married. We don't have to live up to anyone's interpretation of marriage but our own.

 

 

I guess people will always make up their own rules and only God knows for sure what is right and wrong.

 

There is no one singular set of rules of marriage that everyone must abide by. Only God knows what is right or wrong? That only applies if one believes in a god. I believe god, the bible and all the rest of the religious hocus pocus known as Christianity was a manmade ploy to keep the masses in line like sheep.

 

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Jayonskimo

The fact that you like to see or hear about your wife having sex

with another man is not peculiar or problematic. How you or she goes about doing this may be, however.

 

And the way you talk about this subject is, I find, revealing of some unexpressed conflict going on in your relationshp with your wife. This conflict may represent internal conflicts within each of you, too.

 

You wrote:

 

 

"I am 47 and my wife is 36. She and I have been together for 5 years. We're happilly married and life in general is great. "

 

You life, in general, is, as you put it, "great."

 

We must wonder why you would use the word "great" when futher below it is clear that things are much less than great. I will refer to these occasions when things appears much less than great in the remainder of my reply as I comment on the rest of your posting. I think you say "great" because, although things are very good with you and your wife, you wish very much that they were still better.

 

 

You wrote:

 

"Two years ago before we were married, she took the summer off and worked in Florida."

 

You say you have been together for 5 years. If two years ago was before you were married, you have been for no more than three years, maybe less than three years. Or perhaps you meant to say you have been married for 5 years when you said you were "together." If so, one wonders why you would not say "married" rather than "together." I think you meant to say "together" because you did not intend to mean "married."

 

So it seems likely you have been married for three years or less.

 

You wrote:

 

"I gave her my permission to take care of her sexual needs any way she wanted including doing other guys. Her response was, "Yeah, right.""

 

So before you were married, your wife treated your suggestion with derision and was both willing to scoff at things you said, disbelieve your statements, and reject your sexual attitudes. This is not something that sounds "great." Maybe things were not great before you were married but have only become great in the last three years or less.

 

You wrote:

 

"I continued to suggest it to her before she left and only asked that she told me all the details. Well, after 2 weeks of being in Florida, she met a guy at a club that she found very hot. 2 nights later she screwed him and called me to tell me."

 

This is a remarkably fast response from a lady who scored and scoffed at your suggestion that she has sex with other men!

 

Either her scorn and scoffing was disngenuous (in which case we must wonder why she expressed insincere scorn and scoffing) or else you are not really telling us the whole story about how she in fact did react to your suggestion or else the story that she did have sex with someone else is suspect.

 

In any case, something here is not so "great" after all or else you are not giving us the full scoop.

 

You wrote:

 

"She did him again 2 nights later and then just about every other night for 2 months. Each time, she would call me and tell me how he would cum in her at night and then again in the morning. She became his little slut.

 

It is remakable that you have nothing whatever to explain to us to help us understnd how your wife could be acting this way AFTER she reacted so scornfully in scoffing at you ("Yeah right") when you suggested to her that she have sex while in Florida. We must wonder what it means that you ignore this incongruity.

 

You wrote:

 

"Anyway, all the fun came to an end when she came home. I still like getting her to tell me about things that happened while there but she doesn't like to bring it up."

 

Clearly this does not sound "great."

 

She knows you are turned on by retelling you of her sexual experience in Florida, but she then won't tell you about this or her own initiative!

 

If you don't think there is something wrong with this picture, you are not thinking much about what is going on here. It doesn't sound "great."

 

She seems indiffernt to you sexual wishes (which is not "great") or else her experience in Florida was a bad one for her (which is not "great," nor is it great that you would be turned on hearing her tell you stories that she finds distressing to relate if you in fact know that she found her experiences in Florida not to her liking).

 

You wrote:

 

"Now I want her to meet a local guy and bring him home for sex. I can't seem to get her interested though."

 

This does not sound "great."

 

If she is not indifferent to your sexual desires, then she is herself turned off by that which turns you on.

 

This is not necessarily terrible, but it does suggest that you and wife have a conflict in your sexual interests or else you both have significant difficulties communicating with each other about apparent conflicts in order to work out miscommunications.

 

In any case, it doesn't sound "great."

 

But it also doesn't sound unusual, nor does it portend that your marriage is headed south.

 

You wrote:

 

"I don't want this to be a nightly thing or anything. Maybe once a month or so. She is seriously in love with me and I have no fear of her running off with another guy."

 

That is very good news and I congratulate you that you have a wife so in love with you whom you trust so much.

 

You perhaps have a very good relationship indeed. But you have described some incongruities that suggest you and your wife have some sort of alienation going that is limiting how much enjoyment you both can have of sex and of each other as persons, too.

 

You wrote:

 

"Sometimes I think I'm some sort of sicko but the image of watching her get pounded in bed is just locked in my head and makes me soooo horny."

 

About 99% of human beings on earth are "sickos" when it comes to the things they like sexually.

 

But that either means that sex itself makes just about all human beings feel silly or that we all are suffering from pretty much the same "sicko" condition of one kind or another. Some men like to wear diapers when having sex. Some like to have sex only with men. Some only with prostitutes. Some prefer masturbation to sex with a real woman. Some men like to have sex with women who beat them up. And on and on. As Oscar Wilde once put it, "The only normal people are people you don't know very well."

 

You wrote:

 

"Wouldn't you think that most wives would love to have an arrangement like this?"

 

Most? Who can say? Some do, some don't.

 

Women are not less variabel in their sexual "sicko" preferences than men are. It

is just that women have differnt kinds of "sicko" stuff going on compared with men.

 

You wrote:

 

"I have no interest in having sex with any other women myself and she knows that."

 

This is an interesting statement. The most interesting thing about it is that you felt it was important to mention this at the end of your message. Maybe I'm wrong, but you seem to be claiming that you are not really up to something devious by wanting your wife to have sex with men so that you can justify your having sex with other women.

 

I think it is entirely believable that you only want to see/hear your wife's extramarital sex adventures and have no such adventures yourself with other women.

 

But there must be a part of you that you reject very sternly-- a part of you that would like to have sex with other women, or else you would not feel it necessary to go to extra effort to make sure nobody thinks of you as wanting extramarital sex with other women.

 

Perhaps you may feel a need to to keep on convincing yourself not to want to have sex with other women. Whatever is the case, you are entirely normal since we are mostly all into some kind of sexual desires that we feel a need to "justify" to ourselves or talk ourselves ourt of. Sex is funny that way. Imagine explaining sex to a stranger who just visited earth from another plant where they know nothing about sex.. Could you explain sex to this stranger without constantly breaking up laughing? I don't think so. God invented sex so that we human beings would stop taking ourselves so darn seriously. But it didn't work. People still take sex much too seriously.

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that's because you guys are blowing this all out of proportion.

 

A "normal" married couple love each other and are monogamous.

 

Other marriages are dysfunctional and one or both spouses cheat for one reason or the other.

 

Then their are open marriages like ShareHers. People like him don't get as emotionally attached to others like normal people do. Kinky sex overrides any type of loving bond.

 

I know this whole discussion is based on him trying to force his wife to bang another guy. He claims she won't be forced to do anything.

He is only asking for other women's opinion whether or not they would enjoy being allowed to screw other guys.

 

If a marriage is open and sex can be had with other partners without the traditional bad feelings attached, more power to them. This lifestyle is not for most people.

 

Thank you.

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I think your wife lied to you......I think she made up all the stories to keep you sexually satisfied. My ex used to like me to make up stories about things......he got soooooo turned on by it - more turned on by the stories than me actually. Unfortunatly the stories were not about me - what I mean is that they did not satisfy me.

 

I think this is what your wife is trying to tell you. She does not want to bring someone home locally because she never did in the first place. She only told you she did ,as I said......to keep you happy.

 

I don't think you are sick - just different.

 

Bubbles

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Originally posted by Bubbles

I think your wife lied to you......I think she made up all the stories to keep you sexually satisfied. My ex used to like me to make up stories about things......he got soooooo turned on by it - more turned on by the stories than me actually. Unfortunatly the stories were not about me - what I mean is that they did not satisfy me.

 

I think this is what your wife is trying to tell you. She does not want to bring someone home locally because she never did in the first place. She only told you she did ,as I said......to keep you happy.

 

I don't think you are sick - just different.

 

Bubbles

 

Bubbles! Excellent thought but it's just not so. I won't get into details but she was able to prove in a number of ways that she was with him. There are some things you can't fake.

 

Your ex was more turned on by the stories than you actually? Based on your lovely picture, I find that completely unbelievable!

 

Thanks for your intelligent response. (seriously)

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Pyrannaste
Wouldn't you think that most wives would love to have an arrangement like this?

No. Most wives would start feeling unloved, questioning themselves, and worry about the relationship.

 

And-hey!-are you positive that it wouldn't be better keep it a fantasy?

She has sex with another guy and she enjoys it. She falls in love with the other guy. She leaves you for the other guy.

Your fantasy-come-real becomes your nightmare-come-true.

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Love2BLoved
Originally posted by Pyrannaste

 

Most wives would start feeling unloved, questioning themselves, and worry about the relationship.

 

And-hey!-are you positive that it wouldn't be better keep it a fantasy?

She has sex with another guy and she enjoys it. She falls in love with the other guy. She leaves you for the other guy.

Your fantasy-come-real becomes your nightmare-come-true.

 

Don't play with fire because you might get burned!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I'm curious why you posted in the third person in this thread?

 

Also, what do you want me to say? That you're right and I'm wrong? Hey, you have your own preferences, good for you. You don't need to insult me and single me out, I don't agree with you and I never will.

 

I'll stay in that "Mass" of people that are controlled by your so called man made Christianity and follow that which is right in my heart and you continue to go on the way you see fit......

 

Just for the record though, I think you are dead wrong about your idea of marriage and religion and I wish you the best.

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dudesomewhere

ok...I've stayed away from this post for a while...but I'll throw in some pennies

 

You're gay dude. Your fantasy is nothing more than some part of you who is in denial redirecting those fantasies back on your wife so that you don't appear gay. You think you're fantasizing about your wife doing these guys but it's in reality you who wanted to be mounted and penetrated. You bring yourself closer to that possible reality by imagining venturing where those guys might/could have been...you fantasy about the "sloppy seconds" (pardon me for that expression) because that is where you want to be. You want those guys, whoever they are to experience you in that way...to have you as you fantasize your wife projected as.

 

You know when you think of your wife being shared it is in actuality you who is being shared by those guys. You imagine them penetrating you but this denial throws itself onto your wife so that you can continue believing you're straight.

 

Hey, it's ok to be gay...so long as you accept it. Why play games with yourself and your wife. Come on pal, look in the mirror and accept that you want men. Come on dude...you know you prefer the sausage to taco. Dude...dude? Duuude..dude

 

psych 101...you're projecting

 

hehe

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Longhair party dude

Just because he likes something you don't, does not mean he is gay so what your sayin is that if you go 5 miles an hour over the speed limit, you're a criminal , and should go to jail , or you most likely want to be in jail!!! And you're going to find out this goes on a lot more than you think..... maybe you're the minority!

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