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We need a miracle...


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I have been with my husband for 15 years, we were 17 & 15 when we got together. We have grown up together and overcome a lot! I love him a I believe he loves me, and I will do anything to keep our marriage together. I guess about the last year I have been in a rut/depressed I dont no. I try to get up but dont want to do much but I guess enough to get by. But even before my slump our marriage had become just comfortable. We used to have THE BEST SEX LIFE EVER!!! Now its hit or miss MABEY 1-2 times a week if that. I try n ask him stuff but of course he doesnt want to talk about drawn out stuff like that. I feel like hes real sharp with me and shuts me down when I say things, and hes gruff when he talks, so the things he says hurt my feelings. We have LOST ALL FUN AND ROMANCE! When we do make love its no fore play just wham bam thank u mam! Plus WE NEVER HAVE PRIVACY! Our kids weven come sleep with us and I think alot of my problems, insecurities, rut happened cause I kinda gave up! I dont even want to get dressed most days, or get out of bed! I hate this person I have become and what our marriage has become! Does anyone have any experience with this or good advice, because if this keeps up we wont make it and I love him very much he is my soul mate! We have lost ourselfs in, work, kids, stress, life!! Not only did we love ourselfs as people, but as a couple!!!! PLZ HELP!!!!

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Are you seeing a counselor? Depression will not only affect yourself but your marriage and family. Often couples get so comfortable with each other they take each other for granted. It's a gradual process that happens over time and it's easy to miss. Sort of like seeing your kids every day, don't really don't see how much they've grown until you take a step back.

 

I often go by the saying "Years are short, days are long". It's easy to get wrapped up in everyday life and not appreciate it for what it's worth. Before long you realize how much you missed.

 

Maybe it's time you make short term goals for yourself and your marriage? Start dating your husband again, it might take him awhile to warm up to it and he might actually not go for it but be persistant, he will eventually come around.

 

See a counselor if you are not seeing one right now. It's easy for depression to put you into such a rut that you have no hope for the future. Start improving on your own self-worth as well! We only live once, we need to make the most out of it!

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