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Wife Still Loves Ex-Husband


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Will_Mcintyre

My wife and I are both white and in our early 30s. I think that "Bridget" is a gorgeous, beautiful woman but lately I feel like we're drifting apart. I think it's because I'm nothing like her ex-husband, an 6'5" African-American college athlete who I suspect was the real love of her life.

 

It all started when Bridget was 22. She began dating "Antoine" who was a classmate of hers. By all accounts they'd fallen hopelessly in love. When she was 25 they got married. (Her racist father immediately stopped talking to her). The honeymoon didn't last long though. One day Antoine said he wanted a divorce so he could go back to his ex-girlfriend, a Haitian-American girl. Bridget was devastated.

 

6 months later a friend of hers convinced her to try online dating. That's where she met me. My first date with Bridget was somewhat awkward, with her being distant and quiet much of the night. I thought she wasn't that interested in me. Then she asked if we could meet for a 2nd date and I immediately said yes.

 

The 2nd date was nothing at all like the 1st! Halfway through it, Bridget decided to cut it short and invited me to her apartment. There she seduced me, practically tearing my pants off with a growl! We became a real couple then, which astonished many of Bridget's mostly African-American women friends. They thought she only liked black guys and here I was this short, pasty-skinned, balding white dude by her side. Less than a year after we met we got married.

 

Now here's my problem: After 3 years together, Bridget has pretty much lost interest in me. I occasionally try to initiate sex but she always has an excuse not to go along. Recently, she's started sleeping alone in the guest room. At one point I had a bonehead moment and joked about us becoming swingers and having a threesome. (It was a dumb thing to say, I know!) Bridget became very upset and now hardly says a word to me. I so wish I could take that comment back!

 

I had no knowledge of Antoine until shortly after our wedding. I once overheard Bridget's best friend (who is black) saying that Antoine was "hung like a horse." That's when I wondered if Bridget might be missing him.

 

So what should I do? Clearly I can't be Antoine but I want my wife to be happy. I just don't know what to do!

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Will, been there done that. Get out of that marriage ASAP before she gets pregnant etc. You will never be happy with this girl and neither will she be with you. You are a rebound as others have stated. Leave her be with her jungle fever fantasy. My take is she was just using you.

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TiredFamilyGuy

Assuming this is not a troll thread.

 

You had NO KNOWLEDGE of Antoine until after you were married.

 

Ah. You need to have - to set up - a serious conversation with your wife and let her rededicate herself to the marriage or call it quits. Try to support either choice.

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Michael Johnson
Why not?

 

Despite all the propaganda that size supposedly does not matter....for many women, it DOES matter. A lot.

 

It's perfectly reasonable for OP to conclude that his wife just can't be satisfied unless she has a big jumbo licorice stick between her legs.

 

A need which he can obviously never fulfill for basic anatomical reasons.

 

Let her go and find the BBC that she craves.

 

Agreed. Its just wrong his wife lied to him about her past.

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