arichter1966 Posted September 19, 2010 Share Posted September 19, 2010 My wife has a trip planned with her ex husband to visit their daughter at college. It's a 9 hour drive and requires an overnight stay. Is this something I should feel badly about? Should I be concerned? She has maintained a closer than normal relationship with him over the 8 years post divorce due to the childrenn's best interests and I think it's great of her to have bee nable to do that. He's been over for anything from cookouts to different celebrations with the kids (18 & 20) and it has never felt uncomfortable. All in all, those things fall into what I consider "normal". But this trip to visit their daughter comes at a time when she and I are having some stresses on our marriage and he just left a 2 year live in relationship. My wife assures me that the planned trip is nothing to worry about and that I'd probably be better with it if things with whe and I were 100%. However, I can't shake the feeling that it crosses a line somehow. She's never given me reason to doubt her fidelity, yet it just doesn't seem right that she'd go away with him for a weekend for reasons I don't quite understand (why couldn't she just go alone or with me? What purpose is served by them going together?) The daughter is 20 and the need to show mutual "co-parenting" is not the same as when she was 12, or at least I don't htink it is. Am I wrong to feel this? Is it me being insecure? Is it some form of controlling behavior on my part to not want her to go? Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted September 19, 2010 Share Posted September 19, 2010 My wife has a trip planned with her ex husband to visit their daughter at college. It's a 9 hour drive and requires an overnight stay. Is this something I should feel badly about? Should I be concerned? She has maintained a closer than normal relationship with him over the 8 years post divorce due to the childrenn's best interests and I think it's great of her to have bee nable to do that. He's been over for anything from cookouts to different celebrations with the kids (18 & 20) and it has never felt uncomfortable. All in all, those things fall into what I consider "normal". But this trip to visit their daughter comes at a time when she and I are having some stresses on our marriage and he just left a 2 year live in relationship. My wife assures me that the planned trip is nothing to worry about and that I'd probably be better with it if things with whe and I were 100%. However, I can't shake the feeling that it crosses a line somehow. She's never given me reason to doubt her fidelity, yet it just doesn't seem right that she'd go away with him for a weekend for reasons I don't quite understand (why couldn't she just go alone or with me? What purpose is served by them going together?) The daughter is 20 and the need to show mutual "co-parenting" is not the same as when she was 12, or at least I don't htink it is. Am I wrong to feel this? Is it me being insecure? Is it some form of controlling behavior on my part to not want her to go? I don't think I'd be comfortable if there were no real 'saving on travel costs' or 'key event they both must attend' type reasons. When you raised the above (bolded by me) with your wife, what did she say? Link to post Share on other sites
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