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Girlfriend wants to take it slow now


Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

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Old 14th October 2017, 2:23 PM   #31
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If you can't bring yourself to delete the photos, put them all on a CD or thumb drive & then put the disc / drive away.
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Old 14th October 2017, 2:34 PM   #32
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I blocked and she sent me a message from a different account apologizing and saying she's doing her best and not to forget her and then she mentioned our promises we made go each other. I didn't reply to her I just left it at that hopefully she'll understand and try to move on also. I did put the pictures on a memory card and I put it away cause I couldn't delete them each one has like a little story to it and some are just because. Thanks again for all the advice you all did help me see clearly and make the right decision for myself even though it will hurt not talking to her everyday, but one day at a time she will slowly leave my mind and heart.
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Old 15th October 2017, 12:52 PM   #33
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She got in contact with my mom and told her how she felt about me and that she's willing to come at the end of this month. I told my mom to block her, but she says to give her a chance because she's been through a lot. I don't know what to do now that she has my mom involved in all this.
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Old 15th October 2017, 2:31 PM   #34
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See what happens IF she actually shows up. She probably won't. But if she does show up then that would be an encouraging sign

Did you tell your mom about the 6 kids, the fact that she has custody of none of them, the drug abuse & the woman's demands that you leave her alone for 3 months which caused all of this in the first place? Is mom aware you never met this woman? What does mom advise about closing the distance?

Personally if it were me at this point, I'd pay a private investigator for a real background check. Heaven knows what you are going to find. My money remains on the idea that she's been convicted of something & can't leave her state.
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Old 15th October 2017, 4:28 PM   #35
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You need to be honest with your mom, and tell her why you made your decision. If she doesn't agree tell her you are a grown ass man and can make your own choices, and this choice to cut her off is the best one. Tell your mom to block/ stop talking to her.

If I were you I would delete all social media, and get a new cel number. Cut her off for good.
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Old 15th October 2017, 9:03 PM   #36
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I told my mom why I stopped talking to her. I told her that she had a drug problem and lost custody of her kids and I also told her that we haven't met yet. My mom said why don't you go to her to find out the truth, but I told her no I'm going to move on. I'm going to delete everything and change my number I told my mom to never message her again if she messages her.
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Old 16th October 2017, 2:05 AM   #37
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I blocked and she sent me a message from a different account apologizing and saying she's doing her best and not to forget her and then she mentioned our promises we made go each other. I didn't reply to her I just left it at that hopefully she'll understand and try to move on also. I did put the pictures on a memory card and I put it away cause I couldn't delete them each one has like a little story to it and some are just because. Thanks again for all the advice you all did help me see clearly and make the right decision for myself even though it will hurt not talking to her everyday, but one day at a time she will slowly leave my mind and heart.
Wow your story sounds like mine was. Yes it's hard to let go of them. But she'll always be able to contact you and the only way to stop is with with the police. See she got through your blocks... I going to read your story.. Time for you to move on now..

6 kids 3 from a dead bf and 3 from another guy. So even if you were with her you'll never have kids with her I bet she has tied her tubes. Most women like her do after 4 or 5 kids. She's has some issues, but she was there for you when you needed to talk to someone. She wouldn't be a gf to you though. She's damaged. She's been through everything heavy-duty sexual experriences, being pregnant 6 times, have birth 6 times. That's way too much for you to deal with her all kids from different men. That shows you what your dealing with could be a drunk, druggy and etc. I would run away.. Although she was there for you. Did you ever meet in her person through skype? But you did the right thing you left!

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Old 16th October 2017, 11:58 AM   #38
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I told my mom why I stopped talking to her. I told her that she had a drug problem and lost custody of her kids and I also told her that we haven't met yet. My mom said why don't you go to her to find out the truth, but I told her no I'm going to move on. I'm going to delete everything and change my number I told my mom to never message her again if she messages her.
Wow! I have a lot of admiration for you standing on your ground. Good job!! You have enough information to know she isn't good. There is no need to for you to spend hundreds of dollars to get fed more lies and stories.
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Old 16th October 2017, 4:32 PM   #39
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I have video chatted with her on skype a lot, but it just stopped this month. I just got a message from her and she said "I'm going to be completely honest with you, I have been in trouble with the cops from my ex because he had a stolen car. And a few months ago she has gotten a ticket for not getting a new light rail ticket because she thought it was for two ways. She went to pay her fine today and said she might be going go jail and that she's about to give up on life." I told her I'm sorry to hear that I hope everything goes well with you and to never give up and she never texted back.
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Old 17th October 2017, 2:14 AM   #40
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I have video chatted with her on skype a lot, but it just stopped this month. I just got a message from her and she said "I'm going to be completely honest with you, I have been in trouble with the cops from my ex because he had a stolen car. And a few months ago she has gotten a ticket for not getting a new light rail ticket because she thought it was for two ways. She went to pay her fine today and said she might be going go jail and that she's about to give up on life." I told her I'm sorry to hear that I hope everything goes well with you and to never give up and she never texted back.
She wanted you to help out with the ticket and bail money you didn't get that I see. (she said she might be going to jail and that she's about to give up on life") dead and gloom she left you with cliffhanger syndrome. That's her way of saying help me...She needed your help! Do you know where she lives, you might have to fly to her. I wouldn't go because you really don't know her she's still a stranger. I've dated a few who were inside the cell. Not much I could do they didn't tell me until after the fact. This woman reminds me of a woman I never met called Cathy (from Facebook) Same way you have it with her. Cathy was a mess trailer park, not saying everyone who lives in a trailer park is that way..
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Old 17th October 2017, 11:34 AM   #41
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I have video chatted with her on skype a lot, but it just stopped this month. I just got a message from her and she said "I'm going to be completely honest with you, I have been in trouble with the cops from my ex because he had a stolen car. And a few months ago she has gotten a ticket for not getting a new light rail ticket because she thought it was for two ways. She went to pay her fine today and said she might be going go jail and that she's about to give up on life." I told her I'm sorry to hear that I hope everything goes well with you and to never give up and she never texted back.
Block her please.

Ya right she's in trouble with the law because of her ex...she is in trouble with the law, period. Like I said that's the tip of the iceberg. This is not the type of women you bring in your life.
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Old 18th October 2017, 3:19 PM   #42
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She has been blocked. I told my mom to never answer nothing from her again. Now I can move on even though I am hurting I want to talk to her, but I know I can't because she will just get me into trouble with the law like her.
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Old 1st November 2017, 2:44 PM   #43
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The anniversary of somebody's passing can be particularly hard for some people. About 6 weeks after I started dating the man who is now my husband, my EX died. I was devastated, not because I wanted the guy back but because my heart broke for his family. Every year on the anniversary of his death I'm sad. My husband hugs me & we move on.

Was your GF with this man when he died or had they broken up? Is this the 1st anniversary of his death?

I fear that she went from the sadness surrounding him to this virtual LDR with you because it was safer -- you aren't "real". You are just some guy she talks to so it's easier to keep you at bay. You talk about loving each other but that is not real. You haven't met. You don't actually know each other. You know who you think the other one is & you may believe you love that construct but it's a far cry from a conventional relationship. So slow isn't a bad thing.

Try giving her some space but also a safe place to talk about the EX. I literally fell in love with my husband when he picked me up off my living floor, pulled me into a hug & said that he understood why I was sad and that he had great big shoulders I was welcome to cry all over.

Come November, get back on track with your 1st meet.
I agree,my brother died a few years ago and it is still very hard for the woman that was the love of his life,they were not married but to her they were.
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