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Boyfriend has zero possessiveness. Is this weird?


Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

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Old 8th October 2017, 9:59 AM   #16
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Why do you tell your boyfriend about other guys hitting on you? That is unnecessary.
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Old 8th October 2017, 10:22 AM   #17
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Originally Posted by simpleNfit View Post
OP, your bf sounds like me.

Once I've established a healthy, exclusive relationship, I am confident enough in myself to 'let go' or 'freely' enjoy the relationship w/o adding any more angst than necessary. I suspect that your bf feels good about himself (and you) and enjoys being able go with the flow. Most secure guys/gals don't worry about the small stuff as they are aware of their own value and if anyone makes the mistake of doing something foolish, they are strong enough to move on knowing that the other person is the one who loses.

For now, I would chalk it up to confidence and security.
I agree but I don't wait until anything is established or formal in order to "let go". Jealousy is such a pointless emotion. Whether you are jealous or not a person will do or not do what they were going to do anyway.

Interesting, jealousy often has the opposite effect in that it will push people away and make them leave - causing the very thing the jealous person fears most.

I have however seen many women who use your jealousy as a barometer for how much you care - only to complain you are too jealous later on.

OP - I agree with what was said about you not getting positive confirmation so you are seeking it in negative.

Instead of rushing to judgement and posting for advice here, why not talk to your bf about how this makes you feel?
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Old 8th October 2017, 4:18 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by Chilli View Post
Personally l think zero is a bit weird no matter how much he trusts ya.
I have to agree with this. Yes, there shouldn't be jealousy and possessiveness in a healthy relationship. But, we are all humans and it's natural for most people to feel a tinge of jealousy if someone hits on their significant other. My bf trusts me completely and is very confident and secure. But, if he finds out someone hits on me when he's not around, he doesn't like it.

I think the absence of positive affirmations and the complete uncaring attitude towards other men hitting on you/bothering you makes him seem a bit apathetic and not invested.
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Old 1st November 2017, 3:18 PM   #19
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Originally Posted by d0nnivain View Post
Jealousy & possessiveness do not equal love. They are actually negative characteristics.


Be happy he trusts you.
I agree,my boyfriend is the same way
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