How do I ask her out?

[gvitesse]

Hello all!

 

I need some help and advice on how to ask a girl out or on how to ask her to be my girlfriend. I've never did this online.

 

I love a girl but I haven't told her I love her yet but I've made it clear I like her more than a friend and she said she likes me too. We tell each other " i love you" as a joke all the time but I don't know if she means it.

 

So, how do I tell her that I want to have a relationship with her and make it official? I'm still uncertain whether she'll agree to it or not because of the distance but I'm willing to take the risk.

 

Should I just tell her that I love her and ask her to be my girlfriend? and should I

tell her I want us to be together in future? Would that scare her off?

 

Also, LDR couples..please share your experiences on how your SO asked you out?

[justwhoiam]

how do I tell her that I want to have a relationship with her and make it official?

Wait a second, have you ever met this girl?

 

I'm still uncertain whether she'll agree to it or not because of the distance but I'm willing to take the risk.

Are you willing to make a fool of yourself too? Or not knowing how to get out of it if you regret it?

[d0nnivain]

Do you have the ability to met in person? I'd do that before making any big declarations or asking her for a commitment.

 

If you can't do that, I'd pose a series of Qs to her to see how she feels about OLRs (on line relationships as opposed to LDRs where one person moved away but the couple knew each other in real life before being separated.)

 

Think long & hard about why you want to be in a "relationship" with somebody you can't actually be with.

[gvitesse]

Wait a second, have you ever met this girl?

 

Are you willing to make a fool of yourself too? Or not knowing how to get out of it if you regret it?

 

No, I haven't met this girl yet but I will next year.

 

She was the first one to say she loves me so I confessed to her that I love her too and asked her thoughts on long distance relationship. She said she wants to meet in person before she decides and I agreed to it.

 

Did I make a mistake by talking about relationship and telling her I love her? :/

[gvitesse]

Do you have the ability to met in person? I'd do that before making any big declarations or asking her for a commitment.

 

If you can't do that, I'd pose a series of Qs to her to see how she feels about OLRs (on line relationships as opposed to LDRs where one person moved away but the couple knew each other in real life before being separated.)

 

Think long & hard about why you want to be in a "relationship" with somebody you can't actually be with.

 

Yes, I can meet her and I always had a thought of getting a job in her country (even before I met her). I feel like I freaked her out talking about commitment and relationship..she's never been in a relationship before.

She doesn't talk to me much anymore..will she lose interest in me now?

[cerridwen]

I would stop all relationship talk until you meet.

It's possible she's finding you overeager so err on the side of caution and chill.

 

Truth is, you won't know exactly how you feel until you're in each other's company.

The chemistry could be off--or absent.

Or, it might be off the scales and she'll come chasing you!

Either way, cool your jets before you scare her off.

 

My fiance asked me out by suggesting he fly over from the UK to meet me.

We'd only chatted online at that time but for a year, and Skyped maybe once.

I wasn't sure but decided to take a chance.

It worked out and now he's moving to America.

 

LDRs require fortitude, patience and good communication.

I'm hearing that your girl is not too comfortable jumping into anything yet, so heed that...and sloooow down.

[Black Knight]

Hey, you have heard some sound advice from others in the forum, I would cool the relationship talk. You first have to meet someone to see if you click at all, if you see the person you may not be as interested as you think. You can never know how a person acts until you are in their presence to get a feel for them. Absolutely, do not tell her you love her if you have never seen her and don't know her to that extent. I think you may have sent her for the hills with all the relationship talk, you have to understand one thing woman are like deer and this is an analogy so listen up, if deer are spooked or rushed upon they will flee, the same thing with women. Women want to see you a lot in terms of proximity someone you may work with, or someone you see commuting the same way you do for space of time. Someone that visits the same restaurant or coffee shop, you get what I'm saying.

 

Secondly, since you are online OLR is a tricky one correct? It is in all actuality a pseudo relationship meaning its not all that real, if you really do dating online people want the opportunity to see the other person they have engaged on the screen and have developed an interest in correct? I met someone online about a year ago she was attractive and her looks was very nice, right up my alley. We went out to lunch on a Saturday and I enjoyed it but it was no spark, I got a kiss on the lips for lunch I wasn't expecting that and it was nice, I called later to converse but the spark wasn't there. So, you have to meet in person to get a feel for someone.