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He's working weekends, I work in the week... !


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My LD boyfriend has just been offered a job which requires every week, working at least Saturday or Sunday. I work during the week - full time.

 

Currently, we see each other every two/three weeks at the weekend from Friday-Sunday. Unless I'm off work, in which case I go up on a weekday. This is rare though.

 

I'm really panicking as I now don't see how we will see each other. We have to arrange our visits in advance - buying tickets and booking into accommodation and so on. We won't be able to do this if he can't do any weekends and I cant do weekdays.

 

Does anyone see a way out of this situation? I want this to work so much but I just don't see how it will.

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How far apart are you again?

 

If he is working Saturday OR Sunday, then you two can see each other during the one day when he is not working, yes? This won't be feasible if you are, say, 5 hours apart, but IIRC you are only 2 hours drive or so apart (correct me if I'm wrong).

 

If you are a long-term couple, also, why do you need to book accommodation when you visit?

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We are 4 hours apart, so it wouldn't really be feasible.

 

We sometimes stay at each other's but he lives with his parents and I live with mine so its sometimes difficult.

 

I'm really anxious about this, has anyone got any other ideas? With the 4 hours between us its going to be difficult :(

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It will be a challenge for sure, especially since you are so lucky now to see each other every 2/3 weeks for a whole weekend. I know you have plans of moving to his location in a year or so, so what does this job mean re that. Is it better money, better career prospects; will the job make your future life better? If so, I think it will be worth the sacrifice.

 

If he can have the Sundays ánd Mondays off occasionally than maybe he can come to your those weekends and see your for breakfast, lunch and dinner on Monday before he goes home? And since you already spend money on accommodation during your visits why not book accommodation halfway on the weekends that you only have 1 day together, so you are only 2 hrs apart and have more time left in the day to be together (you can both travel the night prior to the day off)?

 

I know it is not ideal but if I had that choice with my bf and as a result could see him every 2 to 3 weeks, I would jump at it.

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In this economy being employed is a good thing.

 

Why can't you go up by him & entertain yourself during the day? You can still see each other at night.

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Who said you can't meet each other if he's working? My man was working for part of my stay when I was visiting.

 

Also, everything's relative. Try to put your relationship into perspective. There are people who are 8 hours away from each other or more, and certainly they can't afford to meet twice a month, nor it'd be sustainable or feasible in my case, because we both have kids.

 

Also, it wouldn't be like that forever, right? You're going to live together one day (if you don't break up before that, of course).

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Who said you can't meet each other if he's working? My man was working for part of my stay when I was visiting.

 

Also, everything's relative. Try to put your relationship into perspective. There are people who are 8 hours away from each other or more, and certainly they can't afford to meet twice a month, nor it'd be sustainable or feasible in my case, because we both have kids.

 

Also, it wouldn't be like that forever, right? You're going to live together one day (if you don't break up before that, of course).

 

No it won't be like this forever. We are planning to live together in the next year or so.

In the meantime it is hard but we will try very hard and make it work. He said we both need to support each other and help each other through this difficult transition stage. So that's something at least. I know we are on the same page about it all.

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