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How far is "long distance?"


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Kid_Charlemange

I'm not even sure this would count... she lives about 100 miles from me. Both of us are adults with jobs and cars, which means spending virtually every weekend together would be quite easy. We also both live in nice areas with lots (lots!) of interesting things to do, so we could alternate.

 

Would this even count as an LDR?

 

My last SO lived less than two miles from me, and we saw each other just about every day. Hmm, then she asked for "space." Maybe this is a good plan :)

 

I know I'm getting ahead of myself -- so far it's been one date (that went extremely well) and a lot of emails and texts, but I'm extremely intrigued by this woman, and I honestly don't see the 100 mile/2 hour distance as a big deal. Should I?

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It would not count as an LDR for me. Inconvenient maybe, but not full on LDR. For me that involves a relationship where you need to board a plane to see the other person.

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Kid_Charlemange
It would not count as an LDR for me. Inconvenient maybe, but not full on LDR. For me that involves a relationship where you need to board a plane to see the other person.

 

That sounds like a reasonable definition.

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Semi-LDR. It's definitely not local. I guess it's an LDR when you really can't reach your partner easily physically in say less than 12 hours without sacrificing a significant amount of money for transportation.

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... she lives about 100 miles from me. with lots (lots!) of interesting things to do, so we could alternate.

 

Would this even count as an LDR?

 

What difference does it make?

 

If you had a good time and the two of you want to see more of each other than do that and quit trying to "label it" unless one or the other of you have some sort of a thing that the only relationship you want to be in is a long-distance one.

 

If so, you've got more problems than just 100 miles.

 

Best,

TMichaels

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It is a problem because you have devout your weekends to each other. That one of you has to drive out and spend at least a whole day with the other, you can't just drive home after a few hours. It can easily ruin plans with family and stuff like that.

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To me a LDR would be at least one state or province over a distance you wouldnt be able to drive to daily.

 

that's just me

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Kid_Charlemange
To me a LDR would be at least one state or province over a distance you wouldnt be able to drive to daily.

 

 

That's kind of where I was going. If it's too far to be spontaneous, it could be considered an LDR.

 

I had a true LDR 10+ years ago, as she was almost 700 miles away. That was still only a one-day drive, but it required planning. Especially since we both had pets.

 

Well, we have another date scheduled for this weekend, so I guess neither or us considers this a deal breaker.

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I agree with TMichaels that the labels don't really matter.

 

However, to answer your question, I definitely wouldn't consider 100 miles a LDR. My SO and I are currently separated by 70 miles, and it doesn't feel that much different from living together (which we did for 3 years prior to the job changes that necessitated this arrangement). He returns to our shared home most weekends, and on weekdays we're both busy with work anyway. This has actually been the case for almost 6 months, and it's really flown by without any issue. It's not even in the same planet as the 5000 mile LDR that we did previously, let alone in the same ballpark. ;)

 

So, I wouldn't think that 100 miles would be a hindrance to you at all, no. If things don't work out due to this, chances are you weren't compatible anyway.

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