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he has his own stages


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helena_bloom

hi :) we are together 2years. in general,he's the best boyfriend i can imagine,i'm crazy about him and we are very connected.we both study so we spend all holidays together and we have contact(phone,skype..)every day. but sometimes he likes to disappear(day or two) and acts cold and incomprehensible.i know he loves me but why he has these phases..? also,he is virgo.so do they prefer to be called or they prefer to iniciate contact?and btw he usually contacts me first, i feel weird if we don't hear each other for 1 day.should i be worried about that? i noticed that when i make first contact he's not always in the mood for big conversation or he is in a hurry,so..

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It sounds like he wants you when HE wants you, and isn’t so happy about you being too close to him when he’s not in the mood for you.

 

I assume you’re long distance? This may suit him as he can enjoy the good parts of having you as his girlfriend, but he doesn’t have to deal with an in-person full time relationship.

 

Have you told him how it upsets you when he “disappears” for those few days sometimes? If you have told him, what does he say? Does he seem not to care? It’s one thing for him to do this if he has his own issues and needs to take time alone to deal with them, but (a) he should be sharing these with you if you’re an important part of his life, (b) he should respect you and tell you if he needs time alone instead of just disappearing suddenly, © he shouldn’t be cold or distant with you, (d) if you’ve told him how it upsets you when he disappears, he should apologise and try to explain so you understand better.

 

He MIGHT be using you. That’s a worst case scenario. Or he might just be torn about the relationship for whatever reason, or have issues going on in his own life he hasn’t shared with you.

 

Also, don’t get too far into the whole Virgo thing. That’s just trying to make excuses for his behaviour towards you.

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I agree with the pretty lady above me!

 

To add, the signs do not mean anything really....He is just being hot/cold. He may not feel well, or it could be a number of things. You need more information.

 

Talk to him about this. Relationships are supposed to be about communication. It will be a good test to how strong your relationship is, and let us know too. We will help you.

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HAHAH! Pretty lady, eh? Thank you, handsome gent! Lol.

 

Yeah, the signs may NOT mean anything. He may not feel well, have stuff going on in his life that is stressing him out, he may be tired, etc. With my ex, he shared all of that stuff with me. He felt a strong need to be 100% open with me. So if he was tired, he told me and I stroked his hair (virtually of course). If he was sick, I snuggled with him and comforted him. If he was stressed, we talked about it. And it was exactly the same with me too – he was always there for me when I needed him. We helped each other. Let each other in. But not every guy is like this, and I think quite a lot of guys are NOT comfortable sharing so openly. He may just be a guy who needs alone time regularly and it’s nothing to do with you.

 

But yes, you do need to talk to him about it. If he’s not willing to do so, or gets defensive, this is not showing you much respect.

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:p Do not be so harsh! A lady should be complimented every so often; it is proper!!

 

If he gets defensive I would think worse thoughts...but still wait for some evidence, but not wait forever..

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LOL@proper. You are sweet.

 

 

:) I just feel good. I can see the Stars now! One day you shall too...you all shall :) -- and I can be proper, tea, crumpets? :p

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You can see the stars, eh? You drunk, sir? lol

 

I like a good crumpet.

 

 

:p No, I am not drunk! You will one-day understand what I meant by that...fortunately, that day is now!

 

The shadows of the hurt of a previous relationship envelope and darken over us; there is no sunrise, nor no stars. Well, the sun has risen, and the stars are back out.

 

:) Well, a good crumpet goes a long way /wink :)

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lol. I like my crumpets with honey.

 

Anyway, stars...yes, I do know what you mean. My sun and stars have not reappeared yet. One day I hope they will...

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lol. I like my crumpets with honey.

 

Anyway, stars...yes, I do know what you mean. My sun and stars have not reappeared yet. One day I hope they will...

 

 

Good, and maybe the OP will know what I mean too by it...

 

Honey is good for many things :)

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