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Should I meet him to SAY GOODBYE in real life?


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Recently, I broke up with my 5 years LDR boyfriend. I was the one calling it quits because the relationship went to hell and he changed so much with me that he's nothing the guy I once met.

 

Well, thing is we broke up over everything but real life. And I feel I need to see his face for the last time to properly say goodbye.

 

But problem is live in two different countries and in order to meet we both have to go through some hassle: plane tickets, hotel, all that... and it would have to be for a short period of time ebcause if we are going to end we cant be like spending a month together!

 

I'd like to receive advice on this... should I do it? Have any of you gone through this situation before??

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Eddie Edirol

Theres no reason to go through the hassle of all that just to see his face thinking it will give you closure. it wont. When you see him (if he actually agrees) you will just want to find reasons to see him more. Use the distance to distance yourself from him. The closure will take time to accept and get used to whether you see him or not.

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Did he ask to meet you to say goodbye? If not, no you both shouldn't spend all that money to just say GOODBYE. Send him a card or something expressing your feelings.

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HeavenOrHell

If you've never actually met, it seems pretty odd to meet just to break up :eek: I mean what is the point?!

 

Or have you actually met many times?

 

I would rather break up with my partner over the phone than go to the trouble of meeting up just to say goodbye, feeling close to him, and then ending it, we've met many times but spending hours travelling just to break up would be awful.

Edited by HeavenOrHell
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I am asking myself the same question now. I ended it last night because he is afraid to commit. He thinks seeing me will help him decide if he can commit to me and we can continue. I thought it was a good idea to let him come since the trip was already planned his flight is 18 days from now. I have done some reading and think he might be phobic and even if he comes back it will only be short-lived. We are already on no contact now. So, I'm doubtful. If he has a phobia of commitment, I made a smart move by breaking it off because it will all be bull**** from here on out.

 

 

I dont know the nature of your relationship but maybe you are hanging on. It sounds like a lot of work just to say good bye. They are right. If it is already over, you should let it die. I'm thinking that I need to do the same.

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What you mean we never met? :o We did!! And travelled to each other's countries like 20 times.

 

Umm, okay... I guess you are all right :(

I felt i needed to close it in real life for me to be a real break up. I told him about it but he refuses to go through such pain.

I dont know.. I dont see it as a painful thing.. I might be crazy and yeah, wanting to hang on =/

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The sooner you can forget about him the sooner you will find a better guy. Focus on that instead of living in the past.

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