Wonder310 Posted December 13, 2012 Share Posted December 13, 2012 I've been talking to this girl for over a year. I ended up falling for her. She says she doesn't have the same feelings for me anymore & isn't happy talking to me. I was heartbroken when she told me this .. should I just be her friend? I still love her & I still want to be with her. Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted December 13, 2012 Share Posted December 13, 2012 She says she doesn't have the same feelings for me anymore & isn't happy talking to me. How old are you both? should I just be her friend? I still love her & I still want to be with her. Any advice? First you fall out of love. When you are 110% sure you don't care anymore, you can go back and talk to her, as a friend. Probably by then, you won't even bother contacting her, as you'll have other things on your mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wonder310 Posted December 13, 2012 Author Share Posted December 13, 2012 We're still teenagers. I love her, but she says she isn't happy talking to me. She says I got "clingy" too. Should I do the no contact thing? I don't want to lose her. I know I'll move on eventually, but I don't want that to happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Sasu Posted December 13, 2012 Share Posted December 13, 2012 If she doesn't feel same anymore,then its not her fault,neither is yours.She said ya became clingy (which is never a attractive quality) ,so maybe that can be cause.Try to change somehow and get along with normal talks.If you both shared a strong bond once,the feelings can always be restored.If not..then just be happy for her & get along with your own thing. Sometimes..its not really the sadness of losing a relation.What hurts more is guilt of doing something you shouldn't have.When a person usually says to himself that he\she should move on\end things,subconsciously a part of mind kicks in telling one shouldn't (for the sake of times you shared with other person).If you do,somehow guilt develops,which can be hard to let go. So by moving on.Its not about getting rid of all feelings for other person and cutting them off(no contact).One can't do that most of times (not to mention I dun think one should,that stuff is mean & bit immature).Take it as,being bit strong.. focusing on something else other than a relationship meanwhile while still keeping a reminder in mind,that if other one tries to give it another go,you may get along.(although don't make it too easy) Another thing..try not to be in a hurry of just having a "relationship" . Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wonder310 Posted December 13, 2012 Author Share Posted December 13, 2012 So do I do the no contact thing? I'm just scared of losing her. She already blocked me on twitter & facebook. I want her back :/ Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted December 13, 2012 Share Posted December 13, 2012 So do I do the no contact thing? I'm just scared of losing her. She already blocked me on twitter & facebook. I want her back :/ If she went so far as to block you on Twitter and Facebook, you have already lost her. Move on. It's over. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted December 13, 2012 Share Posted December 13, 2012 If you want her back and have been called clingy, THE WORST THING you can do is contact her. Do NOTTTTT contact her!!!!! That will ensure she will never want you back. Seriously. There is probably only like a 5% chance you will ever get her back but it will be 0% if you, the clingy guy, starts trying to get ahold of her after she dumped you and called you clingy and blocked you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wonder310 Posted December 13, 2012 Author Share Posted December 13, 2012 I just don't want her to think that I don't care anymore, when I really do Link to post Share on other sites
Sasu Posted December 14, 2012 Share Posted December 14, 2012 You know you care for her and trust me she must be knowing that well enough ( She knows ya became clingy,which means basically you cared too much ) What can you do now ? 1 ) no contact - a double edged sword.In your case she already have blocked ya,so this 'mean method' is pretty much applicable.It can be completely over or another chance may come but that chance will only develop when she starts to sort her feelings & wants you back.How that will happen ? By missing you,no contact is your answer . 2 ) tell how much you care for her by calling \messaging her little more and blow off your remaining chances completely.It rarely ever works.Try not to do this as it does sound like a logical thing to do.But it doesn't work.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wonder310 Posted December 14, 2012 Author Share Posted December 14, 2012 She told my friend that she's done with me (she said that before, but we always ended up talking again). I'll try the no contact thing. I just don't want her to think that I'm giving up on her. Would it be messed up if I talk to other females? Link to post Share on other sites
Sasu Posted December 14, 2012 Share Posted December 14, 2012 In moment of bad times,people in relationship talk crap about each other to their friends.Its not really healthy but pretty normal nowadays,dun stress on it. Dun try to call\mgs yourself,ya must have done that enough.But in case if she reaches out herself to you someday.Try to put aside all that happened and talk normally without even mentioning of word 'relationship" for few talks.You are not cutting her off (by blocking her or stuff) ..that is good enough signal that you aren't giving up on her. As for talking to other females,depends on what you mean by "talk" .Its not messed up,but if you are intentionally doing it to make her jealous or something,Don't.Relationship can't be build on such games.If not..then all good. Link to post Share on other sites
Carenth Posted December 14, 2012 Share Posted December 14, 2012 You already lost her it's over. No contact is not a method for getting her back anyone that tells you that is fooling themselves, it's for you to heal and move on with your life. In the extremely rare case that she may come back and I'm not giving you false hope because 99.9% she will not, you will have most likely moved on already. You need to ask yourself seriously why you would want to get back together with her. The problems you had would not magically go away, you can't be her friend when you have feelings for her. You just need to move on shes already left you in the wind so you aren't giving up on anything she has already given up on you. She doesn't need or want you anymore harsh but it is the truth. Do whatever you want, you owe her nothing but I would suggest holding off on trying to jump into another relationship until you have sorted your feelings out it will just make the pain even worse. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wonder310 Posted December 14, 2012 Author Share Posted December 14, 2012 I just don't understand how she can just throw a year away of us talking like that .. she's already flirting with other guys Link to post Share on other sites
Sasu Posted December 14, 2012 Share Posted December 14, 2012 I just don't understand how she can just throw a year away of us talking like that .. she's already flirting with other guys How you know ? are you sure ,sometimes problems arise when one start thinking overboard and imagining things.Nevertheless ,If you are confirmed about this,then truth is you can't do anything.All you can do is leave her on her way as she wants and focus on yourself.Time will heal.. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted December 14, 2012 Share Posted December 14, 2012 I just don't want her to think that I don't care anymore, when I really do Dude trust me she knows you care about her. She thinks you are clingy, she knows! She told my friend that she's done with me (she said that before, but we always ended up talking again). I'll try the no contact thing. I just don't want her to think that I'm giving up on her. Would it be messed up if I talk to other females? Yes, NC. And yes, talk to other girls. Lots of them. Don't tie yourself down when you are a teenager, you should be dating around and having fun not dealing with heartbreak. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted December 14, 2012 Share Posted December 14, 2012 I've been talking to this girl for over a year. I ended up falling for her. She says she doesn't have the same feelings for me anymore & isn't happy talking to me. I was heartbroken when she told me this .. should I just be her friend? I still love her & I still want to be with her. Any advice? Young love is intense....you never forget who your first real love was....i use was....because......you are just at th every beginning......i know it doesnt feel like it but you will move on....you have to let her go and try to remember in time the good times you shared.....to carry them through and realize its not the amount of time you spend with someone but the quality fo the time....and you will have that again even though you are heart broken now......everything good you learned from your relationship can be taken tot the next when you are ready, anything bad that happened you take that with you too and you dotn make the same mistakes..... heart break is hard at any age.....and just because you are young i validate that you feel as any other person would who had their heart broken....love is for adults for a reason...because its freaking hard its not a game you play and put away for a rainy day...its real hard work....probably the hardest emotional work you do in yrou lifetime much harder than hard labour.... believe it or not i am an adult(mightn't write like one but i am an extremely old soul I just have a young heart).....and i still find it hard when i get my heart broken.......it doesnt get easier....all you can do is take everything good about you , your past relationship and the bad to give you perspective on what path not to take.....and the next relationship will rock because you know how good it feels when you do have that special someone.you now have skills that you wouldnt if your heart hadnt tbroken.you need to heal and that happens for all of us......chin up even though you dont want to, you will get through it......lots of hugs....deb Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted December 15, 2012 Share Posted December 15, 2012 You're a teenager. You talked to this girl. Have you ever met her? You said you love her, but she doesn't want you. Was she in love with you for a year and then suddenly she was not anymore? If that's the case, something must have happened. But maybe start hanging out with girls from your town... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wonder310 Posted December 15, 2012 Author Share Posted December 15, 2012 Honest opinion, do you guys think she'll come back to me? Link to post Share on other sites
Carenth Posted December 15, 2012 Share Posted December 15, 2012 Honest opinion, nope. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wonder310 Posted December 15, 2012 Author Share Posted December 15, 2012 I guess I'll just wait because somewhere deep down, I have hope that we can still be together, regardless of what she said. I won't put my life on hold though Link to post Share on other sites
Carenth Posted December 15, 2012 Share Posted December 15, 2012 (edited) I guess I'll just wait because somewhere deep down, I have hope that we can still be together, regardless of what she said. I'm not going to wait around for someone who doesn't care about me, I deserve better, time to move on and heal. Fixed it for you, you will be ok trust me, just give yourself time to heal. Edited December 15, 2012 by Carenth 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Sasu Posted December 16, 2012 Share Posted December 16, 2012 (edited) Honest opinion, do you guys think she'll come back to me? Maybe or maybe not.I've had my girl come back to me before.I became clingy as well.I figured & fixed it out when things went bad.It depends on girl to girl.. Dun put your life on hold though.let this be a lil lesson and focus on something else..you'll do okay with time. Edited December 16, 2012 by Sasu Link to post Share on other sites
Pink Princess Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 I just don't understand how she can just throw a year away of us talking like that .. she's already flirting with other guys i understand and i know it sucks to feel for someone to throw away time spent together all in a moment. my last one was 5 years that was on the verge of marriage and i was in a state of shock the week we broke up. i know you feel the need to show her how much you care, but the best thing for you to do is to not contact her in anyway. she already knows how much you care without you reminding her. you should start trying to heal yourself now Link to post Share on other sites
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