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Gratitude or Attraction? Work Related, Girls What Do You Think?


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PRodrigue650

My manager has been very flirty with me. Because she's my manager I have not been receptive and have just replied with smiles and short cold answers like OK or thank you. Shes around my same age.

 

This woman says I'm her favorite, that she trusts me and that I'm her go to guy. She notices when I get a hair cut and tells me it looks nice, even though I'm wearing a helmet and she doesn't actually see it lol. She says thank you in the sweatest voice. She gave me a double entendre the other day that was slightly sexual and winked.

 

Not asking whether going out with your manager is a good idea, wondering if my current situation is her showing me her gratitude or if she likes me or something. She wont be my boss for much longer, 2 months max.

 

This is the first time I've had a young, cute manager. I really want to think all the nice things she says about me are just her way of being thankful about my hardwork and trying to keep me motivated in order to keep up the good work. We haven't really had any long conversations, all I know about her is her name.

 

We all went to school with women and I remember them being very cute and flirty when you did their work for them even if they didn't digg you just as their way of being thankful. This is what I think is happeing with her, but my gut feeling tells me she diggs me.

 

I find her very attractive but I don't want to ruin her trust and favoriteism by asking her out because that favoriteism has gotten me out of several ****ty taks and I don't want to be just another one of her employees if I get on her bad side by taking her comments the wrong way.

 

What do you gals and guys think? :confused: I would really appreciate your insight, especially if you've ever been in management.

Edited by PRodrigue650
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I think your manager has a lot to learn about being a manager & not crossing certain lines at work. She is actually sexually harassing you. Double entendres have no place in the workplace. I doubt she even realizes how inappropriate she is being but I seriously doubt she is fliting because she wants you to respond to it. It's a power trip for her.

 

 

If in 2 months she is no longer your manager, ask her out if you like. Do nothing while she is your superior. I suspect the response you will get will be one of shock because to her your ask will seem to have come out of left field. She does not think she speaks to you "in the sweetest voice" nor is she doing that because she likes you.

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PRodrigue650

Thanks for your reply. It is definitely a different perspective. You're saying she does this because she can and knows I am not stupid enough to respond and not because she likes me?

 

This is all just so confusing. Wish I had come across this girl on the street instead of the workplace.

 

Going to play it safe, not flirt back, not ask her out but I will have normal healthy conversations with her to try and find out more about her.

Edited by PRodrigue650
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She just might be flirty to use as a motivational tool and to show she approves your work. I feel your feelings are clouding your perception of the situation. I call it playing on the penis. Workin it to get what she wants, and that's getting the job done right in a timely manner which makes her look good.

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PRodrigue650

I really appreciate your responses, helps me keep me feet on the ground. Although, I must say, my hard wowrk doesn't depend on her flirting with me. I work hard regardless of who the supervisor is and I have been complimented by most. This woman, however, she confuses the **** out of me with what she says to me. others have simply recognized my work ethic and hard work, this one does it in a flirty fashion.

 

Almost every single time I pass by where shes at I have caught her starring. I'm really starting to think there's something there and it's not just me seeing stuff that isn't there.

 

She just might be flirty to use as a motivational tool and to show she approves your work.

 

This is how I am rationalizing all of this, or at least what I hope is going on. But then again, I have caught her starring several times. Why would she do that if she wasn't digging me?

 

I am not going by what I wish would happen with her, I am going by stuff that just isn't normal, no matter how you put it.

Edited by PRodrigue650
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CautiouslyOptimistic
I really appreciate your responses, helps me keep me feet on the ground. Although, I must say, my hard wowrk doesn't depend on her flirting with me. I work hard regardless of who the supervisor is and I have been complimented by most. This woman, however, she confuses the **** out of me with what she says to me. others have simply recognized my work ethic and hard work, this one does it in a flirty fashion.

 

Almost every single time I pass by where shes at I have caught her starring. I'm really starting to think there's something there and it's not just me seeing stuff that isn't there.

 

 

 

This is how I am rationalizing all of this, or at least what I hope is going on. But then again, I have caught her starring several times. Why would she do that if she wasn't digging me?

 

I am not going by what I wish would happen with her, I am going by stuff that just isn't normal, no matter how you put it.

 

I agree with Donnivain that this is inappropriate behavior on her part (even if she is into you, and I think she is). Can you imagine if a male superior behaved this way toward a female subordinate? It would be grounds for a sexual harassment lawsuit.

 

Wait until she is no longer your superior to make a move, for HER sake as much as yours!

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PRodrigue650
I agree with Donnivain that this is inappropriate behavior on her part (even if she is into you, and I think she is). Can you imagine if a male superior behaved this way toward a female subordinate? It would be grounds for a sexual harassment lawsuit.

 

Not sure if grounds for sexual harrassment, it's not like shes grabbing my groin, caressing my shoulder or pinching my butt.

 

She tells me something extra nice once in a while because she trusts me and knows I wont go around telling my young "bro!" Co-workers.

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I think your manager has a lot to learn about being a manager & not crossing certain lines at work. She is actually sexually harassing you. Double entendres have no place in the workplace. I doubt she even realizes how inappropriate she is being but I seriously doubt she is fliting because she wants you to respond to it.

 

For man with game like me, she would coming to work with no panties on already . ..

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Alpha men are not apologetic of their sexuality and the fact that they find women attractive. They are confident and grounded, and they own their sexuality.

 

I have dealt with women who are like that, she flirts overtly. Your over thinking it is a sign of being a 'beta', all you need to do is to be aware of her IOI (Indications Of Interest) and respond like an 'alpha' : direct, grounded, fully aware and conscious, confident, indifferent to outcome and unapologetic for finding a woman attractive, unapologetic for being a man.

 

So calmly acknowledge the signals she has been sending to you, as an 'alpha' man who knows women find him attractive and it's a normal thing for you, 'after she compliments you...you can say, ' you are looking good yourself in that new outfit' but more importantly just accept her compliments with an open heart, as a man:when she compliments your hair cut next time, you can say 'thank you, I am glad you like it' with a calm and confident smile on your face.

 

Most American men have 'toxic shame' attached to their 'sexuality' and 'masculinity', and deep inside most women are longing for men : she is expressing her femininity to you as a woman, can you express your masculinity to her as man : openly, honestly and true to your inner core.

 

She wants to dance and play with you, just dance, don't formalize the moment ' after i live in 2 months then i will ask her out ' What !

 

Anyway I don't blame you, it's the ' fem-centric ' society and 'A generation of men raised by women'.

 

That's why it is mostly that 'nice' husband crying here about how the wife cheated with a married douchebag at work, it's okay to be a good man, but it's really about being good at being a man : thats what women are longing for....

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For man with game like me, she would coming to work with no panties on already . ..

 

And if you worked FOR me, you'd be fired.

 

Whatever "game" you think you have, has NO PLACE WHATSOEVER at work.

 

This woman is the OP's manager! There is a time & place for everything & work is not the place for her behavior or your attitude. Thinking like this is why anti-discrimination laws exist.

Edited by d0nnivain
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