Jump to content

Are my hopes too high???


Recommended Posts

Me and my ex broke up back in June...well I've never really known any "rules" when it came to a break up so NC even exisited. But we also have a child together....so I kinda couldn't do that...

 

Well the break up was bad...but I made sure to stay on the defense because I didn't want to fight. If things were done, then that's it...right?

 

Well its been a couple months. And we both felt like being friends would be good for both me and him considering we do have a child and we do get along great...well he told me, before the whole friends thing, that me and him aren't good together...

 

Well, about a week or two ago we saw each other for the first time in a couple months. He had invited me and our son over for dinner, which he cooked, and pulled me to the side and told me that people can say things they don't really mean...which is true especially when your really upset...but he was very nervous around me, and I was doing my best to keep distance...now i do love this man, and care about him, we both would call each other our lobster...well he kept asking me to come back into the kitchen with him while he cooked, he also kept asking me to go outside with him for a smoke...

 

Well since then we have started talking a lot more...almost on a daily basis....I'm just worried I am getting my hopes up for something that may just be plutanic and genuinely nice...

 

See...he asked me and my son out to dinner...I asked if we needed to dress nice and the time...and I have a gut feeling that this isn't just a nice outing, but more like he's asking me out without really asking me out...

 

But when we talk, I get smileys here and there through out our conversations and those can last all day...we added each other on Facebook, well he wanted to, just to play a game together...he compliments me, and is very interested in things I do...but he also jokes around a lot...but one thing that peeks my interest, is when we were together...he would call me "mama" (he's mexican), which in their lengo is complimentary and is also a sign of interest and liking to someone...

 

I know from being with him that he doesn't engage with his friends the same way he does me...especially with how long we will talk to each other...

 

Im more worried about getting my hopes up...I'm trying not too...but things I'm reading and have engaged with him are showing me signs of something else...or....could I be wrong?? :/

Link to post
Share on other sites

NO you do not sit back because that WILL lead to you getting your hopes up. After your dinner seriously ask him "what are we doing here? are we just being friends, because it sure doesn't feel like it." "I wants to see how things go if this is what you have in mind...but if it is not I am going to have to decline going out with you for dinners, etc." "I don't want to get hurt...I need to move on."

 

You see communication is key. Never just assume things might happen.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
NO you do not sit back because that WILL lead to you getting your hopes up. After your dinner seriously ask him "what are we doing here? are we just being friends, because it sure doesn't feel like it." "I wants to see how things go if this is what you have in mind...but if it is not I am going to have to decline going out with you for dinners, etc." "I don't want to get hurt...I need to move on."

 

You see communication is key. Never just assume things might happen.

 

Better answer than mine though see where it goes meant to her to eventually find out in a month what his intentions are.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Better answer than mine though see where it goes meant to her to eventually find out in a month what his intentions are.

He is already acting like he is wanting to try a relationship again, that is why the OP is here. It's really confusing her and she is scared of getting hurt. Waiting and "see" will only cause her more anxiety (getting her hopes up). She is already starting to invest her feelings, that is why she needs to start asking questions now.

Link to post
Share on other sites
He is already acting like he is wanting to try a relationship again, that is why the OP is here. It's really confusing her and she is scared of getting hurt. Waiting and "see" will only cause her more anxiety (getting her hopes up). She is already starting to invest her feelings, that is why she needs to start asking questions now.

 

Put down the axe I said your answer was better.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...