Luna1 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 If your husband does each of the things mentioned below - You are married to him but only you and your family members/his family members, know of it. In public, nobody knows you. You are non existent in public. - You ve been married for 2 years but your husband never told anyone about being married in public. When he was asked, he wanted to skip the question. However, later on admitted he is married but refuses to talk about you or your marriage with him. He cannot even say two kind words about you. Whenever somebody asks him about his personal life, he is reluctant to talk about it. - He never takes you out in public. - Only shares his own photos but never shares photos with you. Even if you two go on holidays, he will ask you to take his photos but won't share pictures of us together. He can take photos with his female friends, friends, female colleagues and lets them share the photos in public. - You have a child but he hasn't admitted he has a father in public! . He has not mentioned that he has a child and when the pictures of him with his child surfaced, he told it was his niece! - He can't say anything about his wife, saying I don't want to talk about it but he can go in lengths in praising his newest female friend who is his colleague, saying she is phenomenal, and such. - He told he was single to many girls. - He is online every hour on Whatsapp when he is at home. He always gives stupid excuses that I don't want anyone to interfere in my personal life, personal life isn't for public viewing and talking or sharing photos with family takes away from professional life. can you tolerate all this? Why is he doing this? Link to post Share on other sites
Floveet Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Ok let's start from the beginning : - How long are you two together ? - Why did you never realized that before ? How come when you were not married you never realized that ? - What kind of job is he doing ? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Let's start at the beginning. How's his penis? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Wow. It seems he is simply delusional and in need of mental health care. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 He is an actor. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 No, I wouldn't tolerate it. Was this an arranged marriage? WTH? If you haven't consummated the marriage, get an annulment. Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 He's not committed to his wife , his marriage or his family. Maybe, if he's pretending they don't exist, his wife should make it a reality for him and walk.... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Backstory. >>>>>>>>>>>>>> My so called boyfriend is INDEED married and even has a daughter! His close friend just confided this news to me and even shared the photos of his wife and daughter. He said he couldn't bear this double timing on the side of my boyfriend and didn't want me to stay in the dark about his marital status hence he showed me the photos to unveil the truth about my boyfriend. I cannot believe my "boyfriend" double crossed me and his wife like this. I am literally shattered. He told me girls used to pester him hence he has claimed to be married to ward them off. He never revealed his marital status until he was forced by the UK radio people. He always refused to talk about his wife claiming, talking about his marriage or wife takes the attention away from his professional life. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Everyone responding to this thread needs to read the backstory in the OP's other threads too. This guy was never into you as you were into him, OP. I never got the sense that he was really your boyfriend. For your own good, stop trying to figure out why he does these things. Close this chapter and learn from it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 You've been conned by a scumbag. Don't ask why - there are plenty of them around. It's not unique. Tell his wife. Then move on. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Methodical Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 ^^ 10X! I can't fathom why you haven't already taken these steps. He's an a-hole who doesn't care about anyone but himself. Look at how he treats his wife and child, his own flesh and blood! What a douche. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 No I wouldn't tolerate it but it seems his wife is OK with it. She must really like being married to an actor or her self esteem is so low she doesn't care. Either way that is her choice, not yours or mine. What we would tolerate from our husbands doesn't matter. This is about what she is willing to put up with from her husband. While we may have made other choices that doesn't invalidate the fact that she made this choice, as ridiculous as we may find it. Anyway, you now know why your so called BF kept disappearing on you. He was never really your BF. He was always somebody else's husband. Now that you have an explanation you can let him go. Going forward, do not date men in the entertainment industry. Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Not married but I'll still add to the discussion: No no never ever. Link to post Share on other sites
minimariah Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 can you tolerate all this? no but many women can, especially for the sake of their child. i knew of an example like this and the dude was a FANTASTIC husband at home with his W. sex regular, he was helping out with the kid... but once he stepped out of his home, he did pretty much everything you wrote about. his W had a profile with his pictures on it, their pics, always talked about him and them... Why is he doing this? because he's a douchebag & a serial cheater. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Fleur de cactus Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 It is intolerable. He does not want (like) to be married to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Fleur de cactus Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 OK now I remember this, he is married , he is dating you, you saw his pictures etc.. He is a cheater. Stay away from him. And tell his wife. Link to post Share on other sites
Try Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 You ve been married for 2 years but your husband never told anyone about being married in public. Historically, the marriage ceremony is for the purpose of publicly declaring to all that the two of you are now joined as one in marriage. Being publicly joined as a couple is an important part of being marriage. If he does not feel that way, he should not have gotten married. You have a child but he hasn't admitted he has a father in public! . He has not mentioned that he has a child and when the pictures of him with his child surfaced, he told it was his niece! Lying about his own daughter being his "niece" is just sick. Why would you want to be married to such a despicable and lying excuse for a human? He told he was single to many girls. Flat out lying about being married to you is also just sick. Again, why would you want to be married to such a despicable and lying excuse for a human? He always gives stupid excuses that I don't want anyone to interfere in my personal life, personal life isn't for public viewing and talking or sharing photos with family takes away from professional life. Bold face lying to peoples about his daughter being his niece, and claiming that he is single and not married, will destroy his creditably and thus his professional life as people find out the truth. Normal people will not want anything to do with such a person. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 If he is paying the bills, letting me live a life of luxury and I can fool around with the pool boy while he's gone then yes! Totally acceptable. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Okay......I'll comment without referring to your previous posts. I'm married and I would not be kept hidden, unless I wanted to be. Unless it's a security issue or there is a reason associated with my past that I wish to be kept in the background and not be out in public . Reasons like a crazy, jealous, dangerous Ex that I didn't want to know where I am and what I'm doing perhaps. I recall watching something on TV years ago about a good looking male singer, who kept his marriage a secret so as not to loose his fan base and his wife was aware and in agreement with this. His manager /agent said if all the screaming crazy young girls knew he was married, his career would plumet and his record sales would slump, as they'd now see him as 'unavailable'. I remember the wife saying they snuk around and he went out with her in disguise . The show was years after it all happened. Link to post Share on other sites
erklat Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 her self esteem is so low she doesn't care. Not caring is not a sign of low self esteem. Caring but doing nothing about it is. Nonchalance is a virtue. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TunaCat Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Why is he doing this? Because no one is calling him on his behavior. By not demanding better for herself, his wife is accepting his behavior. You need to call him on this, and then tell his wife what is going on. Then get as far away from the situation as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
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