matty2049 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Ok so yeah, I know the hype and the protocol most people have, and that's to never snoop through your partners phone because it shows you don't trust them... But what if you're in the rebuilding trust stage after she wasn't faithful..? Well that's what I did tonight.. I have had this hunch that there is probably something in her phone she doesn't want me to see because she takes her phone with her EVERYWHERE she goes in the house... Well I found it... And there might be a lot more... I had about a 3-4 minute window to see for myself (I know her passcode by watching her enter it before) and I decided to take one quick scroll down her texts... Less than 2 months ago, she was texting a guy I've never heard her speak of before but I've seen him like a bunch of her pictures on Facebook .. And around the same time he was doing that, she had a text convo with him.. One of her texts said "I just want you to **** me" and she also said "oh so you won't send me a picture because I won't send you one?" She then started to walk down the steps so I closed her texts and the app, and shut her screen off and placed it back where it was.. She never found out I was on it... Right now, she is asleep... I want to see the rest of the texts.. And also see if there was anyone else she was "sexting" (at least) behind my back... Is this fair of me to want to do? For my own sake? I want to know if this relationship is worth still working on,. It sucks because we have been doing amazing the last few months (or so I thought, I guess)... Should I try and sneak a peek while she is sleeping? Link to post Share on other sites
La.Primavera Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Is it not enough that she wanted to have sex with another guy? That should be enough of a deal breaker. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
LoveMachine67 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Why bother at this point? You busted her once before, at the minimum you both should have each other's passwords and the right to check each other's text messages or social media accounts. Do you want to be in a relationship with someone that you need to check up on all the time? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 I would have hurled the phone at her and told her to leave. The minute the words "I want to f*** you" appear in the context of someone else, it's over. What will it take - catching them together naked in bed? To all intents and purposes, you just did. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Keke1 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 If you don't trust her leave. No need for all this checking and whatnot. Peace of mind is so underrated. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 I can tolerate an out-going vivacious gf being a bit flirty with another guy as long as she knew her boundaries and didn't go too far to give the guy the distinct impression she was available, and it was not a continual on-going thing. That txt that you saw was over the line for me. If these two ever got together in private her wish could very easily come true. It seems she has done something in the past as regards being unfaithful so to me this msg shows she has not changed her ways. To satisfy your curiosity to see what else she said go for it and snoop away, but I think you seen enough to know what to do. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 As this is about self preservation here, then go ahead and snoop. You do not want to waste any more time with someone who wants to f*ck other people, but hey! Wait a minute... you already know that. So what are you hoping to find that will throw you over the edge? She, for someone who is in a relationship has very poor boundaries. Do not be the chump that in 2 months gets unexpectedly dumped by the "confused" gf who quickly moves on to... wait for it, the guy who is now sexting her. Take the initiative here and do the dumping yourself 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 Bro, honestly some of your posts... I think you shouldn't look at her phone, because even if you did and found something you'd still take her back because that's how you roll..then you'd be back posting stuff about not trusting her and looking through her phone.. oh wait 2 Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 DDDuuuudddeee.. Really? She should of been asked to leave as soon as you read that. I'd of ejected my GF out of my life faster than a speeding bullet if I found that on her phone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 matty What else do you need? You caught her lying to you. You caught her asking another guy for sex. You also clearly don't trust her. Your relationship is dead. End it already. Stop beating a dead horse. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 You know she's unfaithful. Why don't you just dump her? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 If she said that in text (the f*cking thing), chances are she's already done it - with him or someone else. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 I don't understand why you would give her or anyone another chance after they had cheated on you. How much proof do you need that she is a serial cheater/attention whore and is not relationship material. Man up and end it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Wiff180 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 I think you know what you need to do here. The text you saw, it says it all about how she is. I wouldn't torture yourself by trying to get another look, nothing good can come from that. You've found out what she's like, so move on from her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Heer Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Hello matty. I'm sorry about your situation but I really don't agree with you checking her texts. I also have had suspicions that my bf had checked my phone before and I was really surprised and disappointed. Its about personal privacy. If I were you, I would probably talk to your gf face to face. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
kenji_t Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Honestly...what are you expecting from this relationship? If it's cuckolding, go ahead. Link to post Share on other sites
fireflywy Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Hello matty. I'm sorry about your situation but I really don't agree with you checking her texts. I also have had suspicions that my bf had checked my phone before and I was really surprised and disappointed. Its about personal privacy. If I were you, I would probably talk to your gf face to face. Hi Matty, this poster is wrong. Ignore this. Your instincts are correct and have proven you justified. Now, get rid of the woman and any woman in the future who is less then honest with you. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 ^ That was a little rude fireflywy. Link to post Share on other sites
fireflywy Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 (edited) ^ That was a little rude fireflywy. Oh well. Its the truth. If he followed her advice, he would be walking a long and lonely road of even greater disrespect and pain. Edited June 15, 2015 by fireflywy 3 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Yeah, but there's a difference between telling someone "I think perhaps you should rethink your strategy, I'm not sure that will work" and "What dafuq are you thinking you moron, do that and you're in a whole pile of sch**tt"..." I should know.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
fireflywy Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 I think he's already discovered what he's standing in. Lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 I think he's already discovered what he's standing in. Lol :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 The OP knows she will probably lie and spin it around of him for snooping, then she will bury any REAL damning evidence....plus the fact he is scared.....that's why he doesn't want to confront her.....he just wants to be damn sure it is what it is.....that's what happens when your heart is so in it, that it kills you to think it's over. Link to post Share on other sites
Heer Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Hi Matty, this poster is wrong. Ignore this. Your instincts are correct and have proven you justified. Now, get rid of the woman and any woman in the future who is less then honest with you. Well I'm just suggesting that looking through anyone's phone without permission is wrong. I do agree that the sexting is wrong and that she shouldn't do that when in a committed relationship. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
fireflywy Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Well I'm just suggesting that looking through anyone's phone without permission is wrong. I do agree that the sexting is wrong and that she shouldn't do that when in a committed relationship. Well, I don't usually advocate playing the NSA either but sometimes you have to roll the dice and risk it because its necessary. In this case he did and his instincts proved him right. Sometimes its also about personal honesty. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
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