Jump to content

Nervous about guy I'm dating going on vacation :(


Recommended Posts

Guy I'm seeing is leaving tomorrow for over a week to Europe on holiday. I'm just extremely nervous. One of the places he is going to is full of blondes who look like models. I didn't show my jealousy but I can't help but feel scared.

 

We don't sleep around with other people. Dating is fine but

Not sleeping around (his words). But I mean he's in a foreign country and going to go out and have a good time. I'm trying to put my mind at ease but it just isn't working.

 

We already had this discussion so I'm not going to bring it up again and look like I have no trust. I do, but drinking, being single & surrounded by hot women? I think it's inevitable :(

Link to post
Share on other sites

It's a week. If he said he won't sleep with anybody else, you have to believe him. Men in love often can't see other women.

 

Be cool about the whole thing. Ask him about his trip when he gets back.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
It's a week. If he said he won't sleep with anybody else, you have to believe him. Men in love often can't see other women.

 

Be cool about the whole thing. Ask him about his trip when he gets back.

I told him to have a nice trip and I'll see him when he returns. Not going to show any jealousy it will just make me look crazy & insecure.
  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
And why is he not taking you on this vacation? If I was in love I would want them to come with me.

I have been invited more than once. But I had circumstances preventing me from taking the time off. I told him I would go on next one in a few months.

 

Don't know if he's in love with me. I know he likes me a lot but not sure about the love part.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Tell me this.....what does he mean by "dating around"? vs sleeping around? Does this mean you are able to date others? you two are not official?

Link to post
Share on other sites

You're OK having sex with someone who is leaving himself open to meet/date other women, but jealous about a week-long vacation? Seems backwards to me.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
Tell me this.....what does he mean by "dating around"? vs sleeping around? Does this mean you are able to date others? you two are not official?
well were not in a relationship so if someone asks me out on a date I am free to go. I havevt been since over a month ago.
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
You're OK having sex with someone who is leaving himself open to meet/date other women, but jealous about a week-long vacation? Seems backwards to me.
were not an official couple. If he wants to go out on dates I won't stop him if that's what he really wants. He asked me the other day if I went on any dates which I havevt.

 

The issue with the vacation is sleeping around with someone while he is away. He is traveling alone.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Standard-Fare

How long have you guys been dating? And would you personally prefer to be monogamous?

 

I'm confused about why he's continuing to go on dates if you guys set that rule of not sleeping around with other people. So he just wants to have multiple girls around to be "chummy" with?

Link to post
Share on other sites
BlueBelleShell

We'll you are just going to have to deal with it. He is NOT your boyfriend, until you make things official he is a free man. You need to put your big girl pants on and accept that. That is all there is to it.

Link to post
Share on other sites
were not an official couple. If he wants to go out on dates I won't stop him if that's what he really wants. He asked me the other day if I went on any dates which I havevt.

 

The issue with the vacation is sleeping around with someone while he is away. He is traveling alone.

 

And has he?

 

I think the others are right. There's not much you can say or do, as you're not a couple. Is there a reason you two haven't made it official yet?

Link to post
Share on other sites
BlueBelleShell
Guy I'm seeing is leaving tomorrow for over a week to Europe on holiday. I'm just extremely nervous. One of the places he is going to is full of blondes who look like models. I didn't show my jealousy but I can't help but feel scared.

 

We don't sleep around with other people. Dating is fine but

Not sleeping around (his words). But I mean he's in a foreign country and going to go out and have a good time. I'm trying to put my mind at ease but it just isn't working.

 

We already had this discussion so I'm not going to bring it up again and look like I have no trust. I do, but drinking, being single & surrounded by hot women? I think it's inevitable :(

 

In the same vein as to what everyone else is echoing, I think it's really important to take this time, while he is away, to figure out why you are willing to settle with giving your heart and your body away to a man that isn't thrilled to make you his girlfriend. When a man is crazy about you, you will KNOW it. TRUST ME. Why are you settling and giving him your best? He already has you, you're fretting terribly over him going on vacation...you've already given your heart to a man who may not even end up being your boyfriend. And you probably aren't dating others because you want to be with him only, right? Men are pretty simple when it comes to love. If he wants to be with you, and only you, he will make sure of it.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
How long have you guys been dating? And would you personally prefer to be monogamous?

 

I'm confused about why he's continuing to go on dates if you guys set that rule of not sleeping around with other people. So he just wants to have multiple girls around to be "chummy" with?

No, I don't actually know if he went on dates. He asked me if I was and I said yes. I was dating because we stopped seeing eachother a couple months. But he asked & I told. I'm sure that's not what he wants because he asked me again the other night if I've been on any dates.
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
In the same vein as to what everyone else is echoing, I think it's really important to take this time, while he is away, to figure out why you are willing to settle with giving your heart and your body away to a man that isn't thrilled to make you his girlfriend. When a man is crazy about you, you will KNOW it. TRUST ME. Why are you settling and giving him your best? He already has you, you're fretting terribly over him going on vacation...you've already given your heart to a man who may not even end up being your boyfriend. And you probably aren't dating others because you want to be with him only, right? Men are pretty simple when it comes to love. If he wants to be with you, and only you, he will make sure of it.
yes your right...I haven't gone on a date in a month. I really do like him a lot and I enjoy spending time with him. When I see him we go to dinner, and I usually stay over, but your right it's not fair to keep putting myself through this. I love him and he doesn't love me so I have to back away.
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
And has he?

 

I think the others are right. There's not much you can say or do, as you're not a couple. Is there a reason you two haven't made it official yet?

Not on my end, on his. I would commit tomorrow

Link to post
Share on other sites

Well he mustn't be that into you if he isn't going above and beyond to make you feel as though you are the only woman he wants..

 

Or maybe he has reassured you to no end, and yet you have insecurity problems?

 

The person I am starting to see and I, we love travel when we can and we have both expressed how we are comfortable traveling alone....

 

We figure if we are really into each other, then we have nothing to fret about....

 

He is only gone for a week?! My ex went away for two or three months....Which wasn't cool!

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Little more than a week but still. I know he isn't sleeping

With anyone else I just feel like he is insecure about me dating other guys but

He won't say were exclusively seeing eachother. If he brings it up again

I'll tell him how it is. If were exclusively dating eachother then I stop seeing others, until then I'm a free woman.

Link to post
Share on other sites

He is traveling alone? Come on seriously? he's going there to meet up with someone, zowie it's pretty obvious. What else is he going to do? Play shuffle board?

 

Hun this guy is just feeding you bread crumbs, and stop being sexually committed....it's just dumb. It's either you are together or not....and from what you have said, you are not.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Not on my end, on his. I would commit tomorrow

 

 

 

Red flag, stop seeing him!

 

You're basically in love with him and he obviously isn't feeling the same way about you!

 

Stop seeing him before your self esteem goes down the toilet!

 

Nothing is more demoralizing than aching for a man who just doesn't feel the same way!

 

You're hugging and kissing him and thinking " I love you, I want you to love me and only want to be with ME" While he is thinking something along the lines of " hmm this cuddle is turning me on... it feels nice :) Now, I am sort of excited about this Sarah girl I have just started dating, I also like cuddling with her too :D"

 

You know what to do! Stop giving in and being weak! You know seeing him wont amount to anything but pain once he does meet a girl he is really into and drops you like a hot potato!

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
He is traveling alone? Come on seriously? he's going there to meet up with someone, zowie it's pretty obvious. What else is he going to do? Play shuffle board?

 

Hun this guy is just feeding you bread crumbs, and stop being sexually committed....it's just dumb. It's either you are together or not....and from what you have said, you are not.

 

 

 

He probably just wants to go play chess or badminton.. Not go drinking or out partying. Noooo. Not at all:lmao:

Link to post
Share on other sites
BlueBelleShell
Little more than a week but still. I know he isn't sleeping

With anyone else I just feel like he is insecure about me dating other guys but

He won't say were exclusively seeing eachother. If he brings it up again

I'll tell him how it is. If were exclusively dating eachother then I stop seeing others, until then I'm a free woman.

 

And don't feel bad about making that mistake of giving your best to a man that isn't crazy about you. Girl...we have all made those mistakes, just learn from it. I am coming from the stand point of not beating yourself up over it but to be an empowered woman who owns her emotions, her body and her sexuality and who is selective with who she gives it all to. Because any man worth his grain of salt will be thrilled come across a woman who owns her femininity and is selective with who she gives her affections to. It's a wonderful power to have, empowering. You need to own your worth. And when the right man comes along, you will be proud you handled this situation with grace. Don't ever allow yourself to be in a situation where your vulnerable heart isn't being protected by the man you love and made to feel you have no control over your emotions. A man who cares deeply about you wont ever want you to feel that way.

 

Own your worth girlfriend!

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
And don't feel bad about making that mistake of giving your best to a man that isn't crazy about you. Girl...we have all made those mistakes, just learn from it. I am coming from the stand point of not beating yourself up over it but to be an empowered woman who owns her emotions, her body and her sexuality and who is selective with who she gives it all to. Because any man worth his grain of salt will be thrilled come across a woman who owns her femininity and is selective with who she gives her affections to. It's a wonderful power to have, empowering. You need to own your worth. And when the right man comes along, you will be proud you handled this situation with grace. Don't ever allow yourself to be in a situation where your vulnerable heart isn't being protected by the man you love and made to feel you have no control over your emotions. A man who cares deeply about you wont ever want you to feel that way.

 

Own your worth girlfriend!

true. He wants monogamy with no comitment.
Link to post
Share on other sites

No commitment?

 

Cool. That means he is free to pursue other women if he finds one that he really likes and not be a "bad guy" for it, since he was never committed to you:rolleyes:

 

You are better than being with a man who you yearn for (it is clear you want him and only him) when he is just not feeling the same way towards you.

 

As the above poster put it so well: selectively give your body and your heart to men who actually feel the same way. Wait for them to show it, don't just give yourself up on a platter let them prove that you are the only girl on their mind.

 

You cannot do this casual arrangement with this man because you like him a bit too much.

 

I can only do casual with men I like a lot as people but when there isn't sufficient passion there on an emotional level.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...