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Why does no one else think strip clubs are just plain WRONG???


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dreaming4ever

Hi,

I just don't get it!! How can people think that there's nothing wrong with going to strip clubs? Honestly it doesn't make any sense. Especially the ritual of a guy going to a strip club with his buddies and getting a few lap dances on his last night of freedom before getting married. So....the point of this would be for the guy who is in a COMMITTED relationship to have one last little "fling" before he gets married to the one he loves forever and ever?? That just seems SO DISGUSTING to me...am I the only person who thinks this?? How gross is it that your guy is going to look at these perfect women and then come home and want to sleep with YOU, while he thinks of her?? Can we say EWWWWW?

 

I would NEVER want to go to a strip club with mostly naked males. I would feel so guilty and I just plain wouldn't want to go cuz I'm sure I would much rather spend time with my guy, doesn't that make sense?? Can someone explain how people do this and why??? I just don't get it and the fact that people think there's nothing wrong with it makes me sick to my stomach!

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dreaming4ever

Entertainment??? What's the point? If guys want to get laid why wouldn't they just go to a prostitute....really, can someone explain to me what the fun in strip clubs are?? Why do guys like them so much?

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Originally posted by dreaming4ever

How can people think that there's nothing wrong with going to strip clubs?

Plenty of people think that strip clubs are wrong.

Especially the ritual of a guy going to a strip club with his buddies and getting a few lap dances on his last night of freedom before getting married. So....the point of this would be for the guy who is in a COMMITTED relationship to have one last little "fling" before he gets married to the one he loves forever and ever??

I can tell that you value the institution of marriage, that's wonderful. A fling is a sexual encounter with no strings attached, or a fixed duration. However, strip clubs aren't sexual, they're social encounters. Females, and they don't have to be perfect, they're often kind of skanky, with exaggerated features and little to no clothes are fun to look at. This is just something you'll have to accept, as part of the way males view fun. If your man goes to the strip club alone, I feel you have a problem. If your man goes to the strip club as a ritual social gathering before commiting to the woman he loves, in the company of intoxicating beverages and close friends, you have to realize that it's just a night of fun that would be innapropriate once he is married. It's something between him and his friends.

That just seems SO DISGUSTING to me

That's why you usually aren't invited.

How gross is it that your guy is going to look at these perfect women

Again, the women = not perfect. He's not going for the purpose of looking at women, he can do that on the family computer when you're sleeping. He's going to have a night of fun, with his friends, in the company of dancers whom it would be innapropriate to patronize after nuptials.

and then come home and want to sleep with YOU, while he thinks of her??

Aww... really stick it to him and insist you wait until marriage, it's more respectful of victorian values.

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zarathustra
can someone explain to me what the fun in strip clubs are?? Why do guys like them so much?

 

That's a different question. I believe dyer answered it--at least to my satisfaction. :)

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average guy

I would never go to a strip club on the night before my wedding, so I agree with you on that one. I think that men feel pressured into doing stuff like that on their stag night because if they don't they won't been seen as "real" macho men.

 

However, I also agree with zarathustra that is entertainment, but especially for women at male strip clubs. I had to do a research paper (well, I didn't have to, but I chose to ;) on strippers when I was at uni, so I went to a few female strip clubs and a couple male strip joints. Besdies the obvious difference (the male strippers never took it all off, whereas the women did) I noticed that the women were having MUCH more fun than the men. The men almost seemed dead in comparions to the female audiences. It was genuine entertaing fun for the women to watch these guys strip.

 

Anyway, that's my 2 cents worth :)

 

Cheers,

 

A.G.

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dreaming4ever

I just don't get how guys can go to strip clubs and not feel guilty! I would feel SO guilty if I walked into a male strip club because it's kind of saying you'd rather look at this person and give them money to flaunt themselves in front of you rather than look at the one person in the world you love more than anything which would obviously be your significant other. I just don't work like that! Plus, I'd be jealous of hell if my guy went to a strip club!

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zarathustra

Are male audiences less demonstrative than female audiences, and if so, why?

 

Personally, I hate strip clubs. I've only been to one.

 

Why are guys so dead in those places compared to women?

 

Do women experience less guilt because of less stigma?

 

Are men sexually turned on and thus quieter as opposed to women who find the whole thing almost camp?

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Originally posted by dreaming4ever

If guys want to get laid why wouldn't they just go to a prostitute....

 

I don't think that some female wiggling in your lap for tips is quite the same as getting seriously laid unless a guy is really really needy.

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Originally posted by dreaming4ever

Plus, I'd be jealous of hell if my guy went to a strip club!

What exactly threatens you about the thought of your guy going to a strip club? <--- Answer that question.

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dreaming4ever

What threatens me??

 

Well...I just don't think I'd want MY being touched and fondled and flirted with by some dirty chick. That's nasty! And the fact that he'd WANT to go to a place where that could happen is disgusting! It's like cheating if you ask me...cheating where you're not even ashamed of it! SO.....VERY....WRONG!

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Flirted with?

 

If she knew he had no money on him, she wouldn't even LOOK at him.

 

Personally, if I'm not taken to a strip club on my bachelor party, I'll be pissed as all hell at my friends.

 

It's not cheating. Cheating involves physical and/or emotional intimacy. Making out. Foreplay. Intercourse. None of which happen at a normal strip club. I'm talking JUST a lap dance.

 

I think you have some trust and self esteem issues.

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You seem to use a lot of possesive pronouns when referring to the man you love. Do you think you have control issues?

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average guy

zarathustra,

 

I think what it boils down to is that women go to a strip club for fun, whereas men go for...well, you know :)

 

It is a fascinating subject. I only skimmed the surface, but when you talk to the female strippers thay all agree how much power they feel stripping. How it has changed their lives into a more conifdent sexuality. Unfortunately it is a very fine line and most end up addicted to the money or drugs, but I could have easily done a PhD on stirpping )male and female) if I had wanted to.

 

Unfortunately, no one ever asked me to have a try onstage... ;)

 

A.G.

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dreaming4ever

Oh my god! No I don't have control, self-esteem or trust issues...I just think strip clubs seem nasty because I wouldn't want a boyfriend of mine to be looking elsewhere at other woman. Is that so wrong? I'm not saying he'd leave me because of a strip club and that's what I'm worried about, I'm just saying I think it is wrong because guys shouldn't want to look at other girls who are mostly naked when they have a girlfriend.

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Truthfully....and I go to the strip bars near my house after work with the guys sometimes...the guys are male bonding with each other NOT bonding with the girls. Most have girlfriends or wives and don't consider it 'cheating' at all.

 

It produces an 'atmosphere'....not a 'relationship'.

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So you'd better not let him to go the beach, either.

 

Or the mall.

 

Or school.

 

Or anywhere, really. Cuz he might be looking at women at those places, too.

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average guy

Hi dreaming4ever,

 

Please accept my aplogies...I was in no way inferring that you had any control, self-esteem or trust issues. I must have just gotten lost in my elaboration about my research.

 

Sorry :)

 

A.G.

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dreaming4ever

UCFKevin,

that's NOT what I mean...you're taking it way more extreme than what I mean! I just think that a strip club is a place that a guy goes to when he wants to see naked women and he shouldn't feel a need to do that. Why can't he just go to a regular bar and play pool or something?

 

You guys are making me into this freakishly possessive person when all I'm saying is that it would make me uncomfortable if my boyfriend wanted to go to a strip club because he shouldn't want to look at other women without their clothes on except me....that's all!

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dreaming4ever

Thanks average guy,

But you weren't the one that accused me of having those types of issues...which is really nice of you I must say...thanks

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he shouldn't want to look at other women without their clothes on except me

 

Why?

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dreaming4ever

I said he shouldn't want to look at other women besides me because it's called a monogamous relationship, you know....where TWO people are intimate together....not some kind of freak show where everyone gets to see everyone naked. That's just crazy!

 

I especially don't understand the women that can go with their boyfriends, watch them watching certain women and be like "you like her honey?" and get off on that. Like what kind of sickos are they? Do they not get that their guy is looking at another woman and wishing he was doing her?? Like HELLO?

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Originally posted by dreaming4ever

He goes a couple of times a year but STILL, it's the principle!

 

A couple of times a year???? Ahhhhhh....I wouldn't even worry about it. I'm not saying that for any other reason than you really don't have anything to worry about. Believe me...the woman with her hand on his leg has more power over him than the woman dancing on the stage.

 

You are his wife though and if it upsets you, talk to him about it or offer to put on your own 'show'.

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