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Feelings of horrible regret


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Alright here is how it goes.

 

 

In the past I wanted to be accepted within people, be "cool" I guess. Family members abondoned me or atleast where very distant and cold. One night i went to a party i guess you could say..they got me "high" and gave me pills, due to the the oblivious person I am I said "okay". They decided to take advantage of me through oral sex, almost sex. But when it was all said and done..i forgot about it for a good year or two and in between that time I did have a lot of oral sex and again, almost had sex , but didn't. So- 5 times. Lately I have been in a relationship for almost a year and I told him that I never had any sexual relations, but in reality I have. Is it wrong? I feel so horrible..but I don't want to ruin our relationship. I am a virgin..vaginal intercourse wise, but not oral. Am i a bad person for not telling him? Please i need reassurance.

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You are not a bad person for keeping your personal life that way. You don't owe anybody personal information about yourself which you do not wish to divulge. As long as you are disease free, you past is totally your own business. Anybody who tells you differently is full of shxt.

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Thanks for the advice, I just..feel i guess "wrong" from keeping that from him, but I feel it is not right for me to say because in those few years of my life i was unmedicated and I was not "me" ever since I have been medicated I have been clean and only kissed one other person then my partner, which is not too bad..i hope. Anyway, i just can't get out of this guilt trip..has this ever happened to you or anybody else?

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Keep the past in the past; it's nobody's business but your own. Besides, you are "medicated" now and you weren't in the past.

 

I think a lot of people have "past's." I have "past's" and never told anyone, nor felt guilty about it as long as you haven't killed anyone or stolen from a little 'ol lady...

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