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Mixed messages from boyfriend


IceIceBaby

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So I have been with my boyfriend since January of this year. And while it's only been a short time, I was fairly confident that he was the one. We get along great, physical aspect is great and we have very similar long term goals and ideas about marraige/family.

 

So last night he tells me that he loves me...this is the first time it's been said. Again...I'm thinking this is great. Then tonight while having dinner with friends he tells them he plans on eventually moving back to Ohio where he is from. We both currently live and work in New York. He then brings it up again on the walk home. So I tell him that I think he's going to go back to Ohio. And he tells me he doesn't know, he just knows he doesn't see himself living here in NY and raising a family here. Again I say that he's going back. And he says well eventually.

 

Eventually? He says that like it's no big deal. Well even if that is 5 years from now, that's still a big deal to me. The fact that he's leaving is a big deal. I don't understand. Every sign I've gotten from this guy is that we are on the same page in regards to our relationship...and now suddenly this? I know he's been unhappy in his job recently and that has made him think about going home, but what about us?

 

So I guess my question is...is this a red flag that I should be aware of? Is this guy basically telling me that I'm temporary, and not long term like I thought?

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Hmmm I'm not sure. If ya'll have talked about the future a lot, I take it that he doesn't mean that this is a temporary relationship. This reminds me of my boyfriend and I. He said he was thinking about the Air Force... yet we've been talking about marriage a lot. We've been together for about 6 months. I was getting scared a little bit too. I told him how I felt and we had serious talks about it. He really does care about US.

 

I think you should sit down and talk to him about how you feel.

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