Sbla22 Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 So yet another person frustrated with OLD at the moment. Been on and off OLD for 3 years, met some nice girls but few and far between. Had my heart broken a few times, ghosted, lied to, rejected, all the classics. I've never tried speed dating before - anyone think it has more value than OLD? Is it worth a shot or should I just pack in the dating search for a bit? Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 (edited) I think speed dating has a slight edge to OLD in theory if you’re looking for something substancial. People tend to take it more seriously because it takes more effort. Albeit brief, you have one-on-one time with someone where you are able to connect in other ways besides a few pictures and the written word. There are a few problems though. Speed dating is endangered. Very few people do it anymore, particularly the younger generation, because it doesn’t have enough an edge that people don’t seek the path of least resistance(OLD). It’s too proactive for many. It also probably encounters a similar problem that OLD does. It’s an environment Where not only are you trying to look for a match, but you are directly pitting yourself against other people.If I stand next to Jennifer Lawrence, no one is going to talk to me or even see me. Luckily I have never stood next to her so I can get a date.... (though I wouldn’t mind standing next to her once..just once is all I ask..) Anywat, same thing applies to dating at the first meet Bottom line: in practice OLD will probably give you way more options and since dating is a numbers game it’s probably more efficient than speed dating when used efficiently Edited January 9, 2018 by Cookiesandough Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 I wanted to go speed dating in my late 30s I signed up. The events kept getting cancelled because there were not enough men. You may have an advantage there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BluEyeL Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 I did speed dating three times, as a female in my 40s. Slim pickings. Yes less men than women . One time some guy was all over me after asking for my phone number but he was super short . Another time I matched with some guy but he ghosted me and we never had a date. And third time I didn’t choose any of the men . I found the quality of the people was kinda low at those events. I also did It’s just lunch , a waste of 2000$ I also joined a matchmaking service, a stupid mistake of 6000$. In the end, as frustrating as it was, online dating is what worked for me and where I found love. Link to post Share on other sites
Mx12345 Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 I am currently signed up for a speed dating event...from back in November! My friend and I signed up hoping for something different. The event was supposed to be after Thanksgiving, we got an email to day of that people had cancelled so they were cancelling the event and we could sign up for the next one which was in mid December. Got the same email the day of the December one. So we signed up for the next one, which was supposed to be last night. Again, got an email it had been cancelled. At this point I asked for just a refund of my money, but they said no. So now I'm scheduled for January 22. I'm already going in pessimistic because obviously these things are not popular in my area that's why they keep getting cancelled. Mine was not overly expensive though, only $40. Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 I did speed dating three times, as a female in my 40s. Slim pickings. Yes less men than women . One time some guy was all over me after asking for my phone number but he was super short . Another time I matched with some guy but he ghosted me and we never had a date. And third time I didn’t choose any of the men . I found the quality of the people was kinda low at those events. I also did It’s just lunch , a waste of 2000$ I also joined a matchmaking service, a stupid mistake of 6000$. In the end, as frustrating as it was, online dating is what worked for me and where I found love. Oh wow ................ I was thinking IJL and/or matchmaker some time this year but... With these prices, they lost me as a potential client:D OLD I think works well, if you have time to review the profiles. Speed dating: no idea, but I feel like this won't be the best choice for introverts. It is very intimidating to talk to one stranger let alone multiples in one night. Having said that: it may not be that bad for extroverts. A friend of mine meet her new bf at a speed-dating-like event, on first try. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 I also did It’s just lunch , a waste of 2000$ I also joined a matchmaking service, a stupid mistake of 6000$. In the end, as frustrating as it was, online dating is what worked for me and where I found love. ? $6000?????!!! I had no idea matchmaking services with that expensive my goodness Link to post Share on other sites
miketez Posted January 9, 2018 Share Posted January 9, 2018 I wanted to go speed dating in my late 30s I signed up. The events kept getting cancelled because there were not enough men. You may have an advantage there. Wrong. There could be 100 females and 10 males and all 100 females would want the same male or none at all 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Iseult Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 I don't know if it has any more or less value than OLD but it's definitely worth a try. As someone mentioned, there are usually more women than men at these events, and there's a certain urgency in some people where they feel they need to match up with someone to get their money's worth. Be charming, don't be boring and if you see someone you like, you can even trade contact info right away without having to wait until the end of the night. One tip. Try to have it so that it's the women who rotate around the room and not the men. The reasons for this is too long and outside the scope of this thread so I won't bother explaining. Just do it. Link to post Share on other sites
BluEyeL Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 (edited) Yeah, it's just lunch should be over 2000 now. It doesn't work because it's true blind dating. While you do get the dates, there are no pictures and it's highly likely that you won't like each other. It seems they also match you with random people and don't really listen to your criteria, probably because they don't have enough people. I've been on like 8 dates with them and no second dates at all, mutual. Not good matches. Random people. At least from online I could select them somewhat for the first date. The matchmaking service, total scam. They show you a catalog of people and there is a website where you can also look at pics and videos and stats and contact them/express interest, but through the service and if they accept your contact request you can meet. So sometimes they'll send you a match. They also had mixers and speed dating. I met someone at a mixer and had one date and I went to a speed dating event organized by them and I didn't choose any male. They also sent me a match I had a first date with and I didn't accept his second date. However, again, they don't have enough people in their database and they don't give you much of a personalized attention so not sure why they charge that kind of money. A better way and free is meetup.com. I met some guy at a singles mixer/meetup and dated for 4 months. As you see, I've done it all and threw thousands and thoussands on fees/sites/clothes etc lol Match.com eventually paid off Edited January 10, 2018 by BluEyeL 3 Link to post Share on other sites
LoverOfDance Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 Yup, I approve of meetup.com. Tones of fun activities on there. You could have fun and end up meeting someone if you're lucky so why not? The site is free but the activities are not though, lol. But yeah, I highly recommend meetup.com. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 I'd love to go to a speed dating event, but like others have said, I think they are just not that popular due to poor attendance. Maybe big cities are different? Many years ago I was at a work event at a restaurant/banquet facility. Right next door to our event (the huge room was partitioned off) was a speed dating event. A bunch of us were so fascinated by it (and the woman running it was our former colleague) and we kept sneaking peeks inside the room. I really think there were only like 15-20 people there, and there were definitely more men than women. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 Oh wow ................ I was thinking IJL and/or matchmaker some time this year but... With these prices, they lost me as a potential client:D OLD I think works well, if you have time to review the profiles. Speed dating: no idea, but I feel like this won't be the best choice for introverts. It is very intimidating to talk to one stranger let alone multiples in one night. Having said that: it may not be that bad for extroverts. A friend of mine meet her new bf at a speed-dating-like event, on first try. I'm an outgoing introvert and would love a speed dating event. Even introverts can be good at making conversation one-on-one . I probably wouldn't actually attend the event all on my own, though. I'd have to go with a single friend I think. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 I'm an outgoing introvert and would love a speed dating event. Even introverts can be good at making conversation one-on-one . I probably wouldn't actually attend the event all on my own, though. I'd have to go with a single friend I think. Actually true, I'm an introvert but I love to chat to people one-on-one, in groups - not so much (I HATE group settings and avoid them whenever I can). But I don't envision speed dating as one-on-one, I mean it technically is but you don;t have the time for achieving the breath and depth of a conversation one-on-one, it is like simulated group setting (like you're in a party and switch conversational partners every few minutes...) Link to post Share on other sites
Lamartine Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 I did speed dating three times, as a female in my 40s. Slim pickings. Yes less men than women . One time some guy was all over me after asking for my phone number but he was super short . Another time I matched with some guy but he ghosted me and we never had a date. And third time I didn’t choose any of the men . I found the quality of the people was kinda low at those events. I also did It’s just lunch , a waste of 2000$ I also joined a matchmaking service, a stupid mistake of 6000$. In the end, as frustrating as it was, online dating is what worked for me and where I found love. I did a match making service too when I was 29. I was getting nervous about turning thirty. My contract was for a year. I went on a few dates, and they were quality men. Nothing went anywhere though. Then, three months into my contract, I started dating husband...whom I met AT WORK. Ha. $10k down the toilet. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 10, 2018 Share Posted January 10, 2018 im not sure I wish I had that much money to spend on getting a date or not Link to post Share on other sites
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