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Missing person I’m dating


Loveydovey101

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Loveydovey101

I recently started dating this guy. We went on a first date, and somehow ended up seeing eachother 4 more times. 5 dates within 7 days. Amazing we really like eachother. However he just left to go to New York to visit family and then go to Chile for Christmas and I won’t see him for 20 days. It makes me super sad because I love being with him and I just want to hold them. It’s hard because we aren’t like “official” so it makes me question everything. It’s not like we’re a couple, we just started dating. How do I deal with this separation. I know wel be back together when he gets back but still.

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CautiouslyOptimistic

Am I the only one who thought this was going to be a thread about how the person she's dating went missing?

 

I watch too much true crime....

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Scarlett.O'hara

You need to slow down or you will become seriously codependent and needy, which will put him off.

 

Remind yourself that it is not serious yet, and you are still getting to know him. Spend this time focusing on your hobbies, friends, family, and other parts of your life that don't involve him.

 

It can be easy to get swept up in the romance sometimes, but try to take it slowly, and don't let him become your entire world.

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In your last thread you were debating about being intimate or not before he leaves. Were you?

 

You need to reason yourself a little. When we start dating someone it can end at any time after 3-4-5-6 dates. Up untill 3 months it can end anytime that is why you have to hold on investing yourself too much too soon.

 

I also notice you had several dates in a very short time, that's something to avoid at the very beginning. It gives a false sense of intimicy and familiarity. Bottom line is you barely know this man, you've known him for 2 weeks total.

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Am I the only one who thought this was going to be a thread about how the person she's dating went missing?

 

I watch too much true crime....

 

I'm on FB too much. I kept the mouse 'hovering' over the like button for a minute so i could "laugh" at the comment hahahah. Then I remembered where Im at.:laugh:

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The simple answer for the next 20 days is to text alot. in this day and age of instant communication, you have an easy way to stay connected. And look at the 20 days as a breather, you've spent 5 straight days together, and this will allow some decompressing.

 

It's natural in the beginning of a relationship where there is mutual attraction to have some obsession with being together. And the results of too much time together can go either two ways; burn out and the end results are mixed. A break up for awhile or a break up for good. OR you will fall in love and end up in a yucky relationship that everyone hates to watch (like I did). Mine ended up with becoming engaged lol.

 

I wish you luck in achieving #2 result.

Edited by morrowrd
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What starts out that fast tends to burn up just as fast. You are waaayyyy too emotionally invested in somebody you just met. Slow down. This 20 day separation is probably good for you. It will allow you both to get a better handle on your emotions.

 

There are tons of easy ways to keep in touch over the next 3 weeks. Avail yourself of them but do not expect that he will be available to be in contact with you 24/7. He has family obligations & is traveling. If you here from him 3-5 times consider yourself lucky.

 

The fact that you had the ability to fit a new person into 5 days of your life over the course of week, tells me you need more to do. So while he's gone keep yourself busy.

Edited by d0nnivain
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With all due respect, it has only been a week...

 

Live your life, enjoy the holidays with your friends and family... He will be home soon and if it's meant to be, it will be.

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