Do you ask your friends to...

[Fair]

Fix you up?

 

I have disastrous experiences on OLD, and someone at some point suggested I tell friends I'm looking and to send any single men they know my way. Well I did it tonight with one friend via FB and she hasn't seen the message yet but now I feel kind of embarrassed. Maybe a bit pathetic.

 

How many of you do this? Does it work? is it a waste of time? I'm assuming so since everyone seems to head to OLD now when they're single. Would you be embarrassed to ask friends? Or have you tried and always get the... "gee, I don't know anyone who's single" response every time?

 

It makes me feel vulnerable and exposed to have done this. I don't know why I feel like I'm setting myself for everyone to laugh and point... as though my personal needs are just too... personal. lol.

 

What do you think of this? Would you do it for a friend if they asked it of you? I know some people are really reluctant to play match maker. I wouldn't have done it but I've had it with OLD.... not without qualms...

[Jdoublenn]

Do I ask? Yes I have asked to be set up with my friend's friend.. Its never happened though..

 

I've introduced 2 couples who are now married which is cool. I didn't purposely set them up, more like hung out with both at the same time and they met that way. Or one knew I know the guy and asked to be introduced.

[alphamale]

in the past most people would hook up thru their friends or family, I think it's still an important way people meet someone

[Shining One]

Yes, I've asked friends in the past and I got a few dates out of it. However, their supply of single, interested women was very limited and the results were no different than OLD. In fact, I ran into several of the women I had been set up with on Match.

[todreaminblue]

i dont feel theres anything wrong with being set up as long as it isnt forced plus both are open to being set up and both are free and single......i dont feel theres any harm in asking to be set up either...and yes i have done it for friends of mine...guys who i say no to ...i have set them up as i see them as being more matched to one of my friends than me i have nothing but friendship feelings for them........ and have set up my sister.....and girlfriends.....i have had one engagement come from my matching up...he died though....my sister grieved for years and i sort of regret that match up because of that....but they did love each other..

 

i would happily set someone up again if i felt there was a real chance for a love match there....and only then would i do it.....deb

[d0nnivain]

None of us ever asked but we have all introduced each other to new people. There was rarely anything formal about it. It was usually coming the other way, a friend would approach & say they met somebody who would be "perfect" for us. So far none of us have managed to pick somebody for our friends lol but we've all gotten a date or two out of their expanded circles.

[smackie9]

have my friends tried? yes, and they have terrible taste or they were doing this for the guy, not me.

 

I was introduced to my husband with in mins of me saying he was cute. He told me he pounded a few stiff drinks before talking to me lol.

 

I believe it's better to be introduced casually and let things happen on there own...no pressure.

Edited December 15, 2017 by smackie9

[d0nnivain]

When I introduce people I don't make it a thing. I organize a group to go get drinks & have both people attend. If they get along, great. If they don't, they can make polite conversation for 2 minutes then talk to someone else. No pressure.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Nobody ever has and I wouldn’t ask. I already know what single people my friend’s know anyway...

[act00]

I have never outright asked a friend to hook me up with any available singles they know, but I have met men just through gatherings and parties.

 

I'm going on a second date with a man who asked my friend to hook him up with single women. We'll see how that goes.

 

I understand feeling embarrassed and feeling like you're coming across as desperate and needy, but you know, it's a good way to get yourself out there. It doesn't even have to be some official, "set these two up" sort of thing, but just inviting you and this available guy who seems perfect for you to a BBQ or out for drinks with other friends and let the chips fall where they may. Maybe your friend will ask her guy friend if he'd like to meet you, as "she seems perfect for you," and from there she sends phone numbers to both of you. A lot of people meet just because of mutual friends who all gathered in one place at one time.

 

I would be afraid to set someone up directly, just because it feels like crossing a line a little, if things don't work out or the person turns out to be psycho or something, and I would worry about something like this causing a division of friends, sort of in line with the risks of dating a coworker...if that makes sense. BUT at the same time, I wouldn't be opposed to inviting two singles I know out for drinks or host a gathering and see if they match up.

 

I don't really know anyone who's single, but I guess overall, I'm not opposed to bringing two people together in one place.

 

I don't really see it as desperate or anything. It's ballsy. I don't think anyone's laughing. You'll have to update us on if this works out.

[Fair]

Thanks, I most definitely will, act00.