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To stay and wait or just go


Orije

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Hello everyone it's been a long while since I have been here. I will try to shorten this as much as possible.

 

Currently talking to a girl for the past few months. The first few months we were just friends sharing hilarious memes or pictures to a group of friends. We finally got to hang out about a month ago and she is a really cool person and I started to fall for her, but hid the fact that I did.

 

A week into it she asks me to send nudes to which I thought she was joking and I came out and told her I liked her so I was a bit shy about it, but she was serious. We exchanged nudes and began talking more. I didn't think this would actually happen. We hung out more at her place because she had a 1 year old.

 

We had sex and I started to develop feeling more, but this is what I'm stuck at. She came out and told me she is not affectionate and emotionally unavailable since she came out of a relationship 2 months ago.I told her if she starts having sex with anyone else to let me know and she and i agreed to the same

 

She says she likes me, but doesn't want a relationship currently. We have still been having sex, her daughter seems to like me, but when someone asks if we are together she comes to me asking if I said anything, but I deny because I keep my personal life to myself. Only her best friend knows that we have slept together.

 

I work 70 hours a week and don't have much time for anything else instead of sleep, the gym and spend time with her when she asks me to come over.

 

I'm not sure if I should continue going on and hope she wants to settle down and have a relationship or I should just remove myself because I'm starting to like her more? Please and thanks you!

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Also I forgot to add we are both 23.

 

So should I stick around for the sex and hope something more happens? She had told me before to finds me to be a really nice and caring guy, but she doesn't want to lead me on at the moment

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It sounds like she's sleeping with somebody else, too, like her ex, which is why she's so nervous about you saying anything to anybody. Just my opinion of course.

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Well her ex left her because the father of her kid had a problem with him so he left her. she said last time she had sex was with her ex and I've been the only other person.

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I went to hang out with her today and she says she doesnt like to be touched all the time, like cuddling and such and I respect that, but we were watching movie and she was on her phone. I took a peek over and she was sending an almost nude to somebody on snapchat and my heart dropped.

 

I think I'll create distance and give up :(

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Sorry for posting a lot I guess I'm just venting about it. I was supposed to stay over the night, but she didn't want to sleep in the same bed and I was fine with it.

 

During the whole time she was on her phone messaging someone else and I never seen her smile like that before even after she sent the photos. Guess my heart is broken and I probably will stay away from dating for awhile.

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Ugh, sorry buddy, this is tough. She may be being honest with you, but her behavior still isn't okay. She is being disrespectful of you and your time and blatantly at that, with all the phone use in front of you. It's possible you are more attracted to her because she is keeping you at such a distance. I would get as far away from her as you can. She will continue to hurt you. Try to start dating other people. Sounds like you deserve much better.

I just learned this, 'you need to judge the situation based on the person that is standing in front of you, not what you 'think it could be' or what 'you think they could be'.' It will leave you heartbroken. I was dating someone I was so into and he would only give me so much, but I was in love with his potential and our potential future once he could 'give me more', it never happened.

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Versacehottie
Well her ex left her because the father of her kid had a problem with him so he left her. she said last time she had sex was with her ex and I've been the only other person.

 

So wait i know this is going to sound extremely judge-y of me: so she has a 1 year old kid from one guy and a break up with another guy just two months ago? Am I getting this right? And she is 23? Before I even knew your ages or the fact that she really stacks guys one right after another I was going to say for your sake to date others as well. Right now you already sound too attached--with someone who is a definite risk--and that was just based on her coming out of a relationship just two months ago & telling you to your face that she is not ready for a relationship. (it could actually be the truth and she may be getting her stuff together-not to mention paying attention to her kid). Most girls I know would not tell a guy they truly liked that they weren't interested for fear of losing him altogether. They WOULD say that if they are on the fence, juggling other options, fickle or as worded "not interested" in a relationship with you.

 

I was going to say because you work a lot and have little time for anything else, YOU are settling. It already sounds like you are acting like you are at her beck and call, which won't help you win her over. Anyway, if I understand things right, not sure she is a good relationship material anyway--look at her track record, not good my friend. Um, this sounds like the exact definition of monkey branching. Be careful or you will find yourself trapped.

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She TOLD you she isn't interested in a relationship because she is still healing from a breakup. She just wants FWB to take the loneliness away, that is all. And that's pretty much all she will ever want from you, until someone she has an interest in another guy that comes along....sorry but you are not BF material to her.

 

If you are catching feelings, stop seeing her.

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She TOLD you she isn't interested in a relationship because she is still healing from a breakup. She just wants FWB to take the loneliness away, that is all. And that's pretty much all she will ever want from you, until someone she has an interest in another guy that comes along....sorry but you are not BF material to her.

 

If you are catching feelings, stop seeing her.

 

This seems a rare occasion, because never in my life, not even one time, have I slept with a woman who didn't end up wanting more, including a full-blown committed relationship. Always, and I do mean every single time, they were the ones who caught feelings and some even hounded me whether I wanted it or not. I'm no spring chicken, either. I always thought it was because women viewed sex as an emotional attachment and to men it was just sex.

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Thanks guys, but to answer most of what was said here, she was in a relationship with the father of her baby until she got pregnant because he started cheating on her and he was in the Marines. I'm not sure when she started a relationship with the second guy, but I know they broke up 2 months ago because the father of the baby threatened him.

 

It was weird because at first she was cuddly and when I was a gentlemen she liked it. When I learned more about her is when I heard she is on and off about her emotions and she hit me with the "I don't like to be touched" I asked when would I know when you want sex? And she said I'll just know..

 

I don't multidate so to find out another guy has her attention and she can easily send out photos and talk to them after what was said to me. Hits me really hard.

 

We are awake around the same time and she seemed like a cool and respectable girl that's why even with my busy schedule I thought I could make it work

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So this one is different from all the others that came before....that's because she isn't testing you......she's got a lot of emotional baggage. regardless of him cheating on her...she still wants him.

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Versacehottie
Thanks guys, but to answer most of what was said here, she was in a relationship with the father of her baby until she got pregnant because he started cheating on her and he was in the Marines. I'm not sure when she started a relationship with the second guy, but I know they broke up 2 months ago because the father of the baby threatened him.

 

It was weird because at first she was cuddly and when I was a gentlemen she liked it. When I learned more about her is when I heard she is on and off about her emotions and she hit me with the "I don't like to be touched" I asked when would I know when you want sex? And she said I'll just know..

 

I don't multidate so to find out another guy has her attention and she can easily send out photos and talk to them after what was said to me. Hits me really hard.

 

We are awake around the same time and she seemed like a cool and respectable girl that's why even with my busy schedule I thought I could make it work

 

I'm wondering if you see the irony in the fact that she reached out to you first about sexting with you and now you've pretty much caught her doing the same thing to another guy WHILE in your presence? And at same time what she has with you has morphed into "i don't like to be touched" (btw, your response to her statement of that wasn't great either). I think you are being duped really. I think she thrives on attention from guys, the wrong kind of attention and probably has a bit of growing up to do--you would think a one year old kid would have kicked in the growing up but apparently not. This is messy. Extract yourself.

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I went to hang out with her today and she says she doesnt like to be touched all the time, like cuddling and such and I respect that, but we were watching movie and she was on her phone. I took a peek over and she was sending an almost nude to somebody on snapchat and my heart dropped.

 

I think I'll create distance and give up :(

 

Sorry for posting a lot I guess I'm just venting about it. I was supposed to stay over the night, but she didn't want to sleep in the same bed and I was fine with it.

 

During the whole time she was on her phone messaging someone else and I never seen her smile like that before even after she sent the photos. Guess my heart is broken and I probably will stay away from dating for awhile.

 

Thanks guys, but to answer most of what was said here, she was in a relationship with the father of her baby until she got pregnant because he started cheating on her and he was in the Marines. I'm not sure when she started a relationship with the second guy, but I know they broke up 2 months ago because the father of the baby threatened him.

 

It was weird because at first she was cuddly and when I was a gentlemen she liked it. When I learned more about her is when I heard she is on and off about her emotions and she hit me with the "I don't like to be touched" I asked when would I know when you want sex? And she said I'll just know..

 

I don't multidate so to find out another guy has her attention and she can easily send out photos and talk to them after what was said to me. Hits me really hard.

 

We are awake around the same time and she seemed like a cool and respectable girl that's why even with my busy schedule I thought I could make it work

 

This woman has no respect for you whatsoever, and this is not to be rude but I am wondering how much self-respect you have, because most men, myself included, would have called her out on that behavior and dumped her on the spot and walked out. You can do much better than this.

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