LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Romantic > Dating

Continued mixed signals...


Dating Dating, courting, or going steady? Things not working out the way you had hoped? Stand up on your soap box and let us know what's going on!

Like Tree6Likes
  • 1 Post By Cookiesandough
  • 1 Post By coolheadal
  • 1 Post By coolheadal
  • 2 Post By CryForNoOne
  • 1 Post By Cookiesandough
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 9th November 2017, 11:39 PM   #1
Established Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 1,144
Continued mixed signals...

I hung out last night with this waitress, let's call her Caitlin, I used to have a crush on. We've become good friends but there has always this sexual tension and cloud of uncertainty (at least for me but perhaps both of us).

Playing with fire?

I'm often Caitlin's teammate for trivia night at her work on Wednesday nights. We continue to hang after she clocks out at 10PM. Last night we hung out the whole night until 2:30AM - almost 7 hours! Neither of us seemed to have any interest in stopping and we completely lost track of time. We both make each other laugh hysterically.

A girl I just started seeing texted me about 8PM. I told her I was at the bar and invited her to join me to which she replied "OK". Caitlin met her last week and approved - giving her the big thumbs up. Anyway, she never showed up. At 10:30PM she texted me "good night", which Caitlin saw as I read. She jokingly remarked "She probably came here and saw us together and assumed we were f**king so went home." What to make of that???

Things continued to get more convoluted. We were also chatting with our bartender, let's call her Ashley, who is also very attractive and just started working there. I mentioned I was in a band and Ashley asked when our next gig was. I told her we're shooting a promo video on Monday for an upcoming tour but I could invite a few groupies (jk). She added me on IG and gave me her number so I would invite her. She also asked Caitlin for her number (they don't know each other well yet) and asked her to join. So now both are coming to my video shoot on Monday. So Ashley seems interested in me but recruited Caitlin to tag along.

Now another really odd thing is that about a month ago Caitlin had confided with me about a vaginal bacteria infection that she is struggling with. She stopped drinking and altered her diet to try to get rid of it. Last night I jokingly commented that she must be over it as she was drinking a lot, but she told me no - she just gave up any homeopathic remedy for the moment. Just the fact that we talk about her feminine hygiene confuses me thoroughly. Am I in the ultimate friend-zone or is this some bizarre form of pre-sex intimacy??? I'm not even sure who has friend-zoned whom at this point...

When I dropped Caitlin off she asked me to park and we talked for another 30 minutes in front of her place. Her roommate was out of town. Was she just lonely and wanted someone to talk to? She didn't invite me up and I didn't dare make a move. We have a great friendship and I'm afraid to ruin it. She is the only female friend I have that is completely drama free. The minute I cross that line, I'm terrified I'm going to ruin that forever. She also supposedly has a boyfriend though they've been in breakup limbo for months now. So I just let her talk until she finally went upstairs.

I've been trying to play it cool with Caitlin so I don't text her after we hang out - other than to let her know I made it home safely. She always texts me first the next day thanking me for the ride home and for my "friendship". I did text Ashley today, inviting her to Monday's shoot to which she replied "Yes!!!! I've been practicing my moves!" (I joked we needed fly girls for the video). I haven't invited Caitlin yet.
__________________
And in her eyes you see nothing
No sign of love behind the tears
Cried for no one
A love that should have lasted years
CryForNoOne is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 9th November 2017, 11:50 PM   #2
Established Member
 
Cookiesandough's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 4,193
I don't think anyone sane talks about their vag infection to someone they're sexually interested in. I'm sorry!!!
Cookiesandough is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 9th November 2017, 11:53 PM   #3
Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: South Florida
Posts: 3,094
Ashey sounds promising for you I get a good vibe from what you just said. I don't get any other vibe from Caitlin is just your buddy. She had another guy but broke off a few months ago. You see she tells you things your like her "b" or friend in this case. So you can have a girl as a friend no as the boy friend and girl friend. Go after Ashey. The other one as V Infection did she say yeast infection then she would have to control her diet and drink more water.
coolheadal is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 9th November 2017, 11:54 PM   #4
Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: South Florida
Posts: 3,094
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cookiesandough View Post
I don't think anyone sane talks about their vag infection to someone they're sexually interested in. I'm sorry!!!
Your right I agree, this woman thinks of him as her buddy.. That's it.. It's better off with Ashey if she said "YES!!!!
coolheadal is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10th November 2017, 6:44 AM   #5
Established Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 1,144
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cookiesandough View Post
I don't think anyone sane talks about their vag infection to someone they're sexually interested in. I'm sorry!!!
Who talks to anyone about their vag infection except their mom, a close girlfriend, or gynecologist??? None of my exes have ever given me the level of detail she has, including one I lived with for 12 years!
CryForNoOne is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10th November 2017, 7:56 AM   #6
Established Member
 
Cookiesandough's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 4,193
Quote:
Originally Posted by CryForNoOne View Post
Who talks to anyone about their vag infection except their mom, a close girlfriend, or gynecologist??? None of my exes have ever given me the level of detail she has, including one I lived with for 12 years!
hahaha yea it's interesting. I remember talking about my menstrual cycle with crushes before I knew how appalling that was, but this is something else. I'm surprised it didn't put you off xD I agree with Al
Cookiesandough is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10th November 2017, 8:39 AM   #7
Established Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 1,144
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cookiesandough View Post
hahaha yea it's interesting. I remember talking about my menstrual cycle with crushes before I knew how appalling that was, but this is something else. I'm surprised it didn't put you off xD I agree with Al
She gets away with murder because she's so pretty. For instance, also on Wednesday I insisted she take a breath mint because she reeked of garlic pretty bad. She couldn't believe I was the first person to tell her. But then proceeded to intentionally blow her garlic/mint breath in my face the rest of the night. Definitely if she wasn't so attractive, these things would be really off putting. But then last night she texted me and Ashley a pic of her lunch with more garlic (must be part of her bacteria cleansing diet) with the caption "Who's bringing breath mints tonight "

I think I'm going to leave it alone for now and continue pursuing may other options. I'm really content with our friendship as she is consistent and reliable female company with zero drama. She's always there for me when I'm feeling slightly lonely. I think she views me as a friend but I would not be surprised if she's harboring secret feelings. I'm definitely not sure how I feel. It's been ages now, but when I was 22 I had a very similar dynamic with a girl I would up dating for 4.5 years. We knew each other for about a year before dating and the playful flirting gradually progressed. When we finally went on our first date, we were already in love, and she moved in the very next day...
CryForNoOne is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Mixed signals? PurplePanther In Search Of... 6 21st October 2014 11:49 PM
Mixed signals? Netsky25 Breaks and Breaking Up 4 29th November 2013 5:10 AM
Mixed signals, misread signals, what the hell does friends first really mean? hieu Dating 4 7th September 2008 12:51 AM
My STBX is giving more mixed signals, and some not-so-mixed. Help! lifeonhold Separation and Divorce 13 3rd February 2005 4:33 AM

 

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:43 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2013 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.