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I知 guessing this was a rejection? Feels like one


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Old 9th November 2017, 3:41 PM   #1
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I知 guessing this was a rejection? Feels like one

We致e had two great dates so far, won稚 really get into detail..

After the first date when I asked when she was next free she told me 的知 free whenever you are so we arranged the second date.

After the second date today I asked when is she next free to get together and she replied 泥on't get too drunk! Haha, I'm not sure maybe when I have some money 😂 x so I replied 展e don稚 have to spend money, but I壇 like to see you again. Maybe some other time, let me know when you池e free x

I致e left it at that. I know she痴 tight on money at the moment as she told me she hardly has anything since investing in a laptop and she wanted to go halves with me on our meal but I said it was okay.

Was this a sign of her not wanting to see me again?
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Old 9th November 2017, 3:53 PM   #2
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.. "maybe when I have some money" might have been some thinly veiled passive aggressiveness for you not insisting on paying on the dates even though she offered. xD Can't win that game

Last edited by Cookiesandough; 9th November 2017 at 4:01 PM..
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Old 9th November 2017, 4:01 PM   #3
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.. "maybe when I have some money" might have been some thinly veiled passive aggressiveness for you not insisting on paying on the dates even though she offered. xD
I paid for both dates, she offered to split the bill but I said it was fine and I paid it.
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Old 9th November 2017, 4:10 PM   #4
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Oh I'm sorry. I misunderstood. What she said makes 0 sense in that case...I would just look elsewhere. Seems like you acted completely appropriately.

Last edited by Cookiesandough; 9th November 2017 at 4:14 PM..
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Old 9th November 2017, 4:29 PM   #5
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After the second date today I asked when is she next free to get together and she replied Don't get too drunk! Haha, I'm not sure maybe when I have some money 😂 x so I replied 展e don稚 have to spend money, but I壇 like to see you again. Maybe some other time, let me know when you池e free x
Why did she tell you not to get too drunk? Did you get too drunk on your second date? That could be the reason.
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Old 9th November 2017, 4:37 PM   #6
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ahh I don't know...I would hold off contacting her and see if she texts you first. she also may not like your drinking.
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Old 9th November 2017, 4:42 PM   #7
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Why did she tell you not to get too drunk? Did you get too drunk on your second date? That could be the reason.
No it was in response to my previous text. In the morning she said she hopes I enjoy drinks with my mates later. I told her I壇 be going in the evening after getting things done during the day and she then joked saying don稚 get too drunk. I didn稚 make that clear in my main post, apologies.
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Old 9th November 2017, 4:43 PM   #8
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I posted a facebook status regarding my productive day which said 擢eeling determined. As one door closes, another one opens .

Soon after she text me 徹kay 😊 what's your status about? X. I replied 笛ust career stuff, got a lot done today with applications and that 😉 x

A few minutes after she sent her text she also tagged me in a post of a picture of a coin broken in half, with a tagline of 鍍his is how broke I am. It was supposed to be humoress, it did make me laugh.

But I知 just confused regarding setting a date to meet up again. We don稚 have to spend money to be with each other in person, I just feel like it痴 an excuse because if you were interested in someone you壇 see them surely?
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Old 9th November 2017, 5:20 PM   #9
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Other advice I'm getting elsewhere seems to suggest things might be going too quickly and she's possibly putting the brakes on.

We've had a date last Sunday, one Wednesday and I was asking for a third. Some are saying even two in one week is too much.

Any thoughts whether I've ruined my chances because of this?

My plan was to let her bring up the date idea seeing as I told her to let me know when she's free. But then what if all we do is talk and she doesn't? Another idea was to wait until Sunday and suggest arranging something for the following week and be direct with what I want.
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Old 9th November 2017, 5:59 PM   #10
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She sounds complicated for no reason. I'd move on.

ETA: Is there a significant age difference? It seems a bit unusual for a woman to be so open about money issues unless she is looking for a sugar daddy.
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Old 9th November 2017, 6:13 PM   #11
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Do you talk about money a lot? Are you very money-career-success focused?
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Old 9th November 2017, 7:27 PM   #12
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Do you talk about money a lot? Are you very money-career-success focused?
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Is there a significant age difference? It seems a bit unusual for a woman to be so open about money issues unless she is looking for a sugar daddy.
I'm 25 and she is 23. She lives in her own flat and mentioned the cost of her rent and bills, it seemed a lot.

Money is hardly a topic we talk about. It first started on the day of our second date, on Wednesday, when she asked how much is the place we're going to going to cost? I told her the price and she said she wouldn't be able to afford that because of the new laptop she's bought for work (I knew she was purchasing one as this came up on our first date). I told her it was okay and I had it already booked/paid for.

All of her money is sucked into her laptop right now it seems.

When we went out to eat she said she wanted my details to transfer money across when she gets paid, but I told her not to worry. She mentioned she only had about 」8 in her account and she joked about it.

After she text me tonight, she tagged me in this picture on facebook

https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net...d4&oe=5A98467D

I've noticed the texting has died down a little but I'll be direct and message her on Sunday to see when she's free the following week and say it's my treat. If I get some other excuse or anything other than yes, I'll either tell her that it's been great getting to know her but best I take the hint and leave things here wishing her good luck for the future, or I don't reply and just remove her from Facebook and move on.

I'd rather someone be honest with me if they weren't feeling it, than excuses.. But the "lack of money" and "buying a laptop for work" did crop up in both of our dates so it wasn't just made up tonight.
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Old 9th November 2017, 7:34 PM   #13
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its too many dates in a row too close together for me. I don't know how much time the average woman likes to spend when first meeting a guy but that's too much for me personally
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Old 9th November 2017, 7:38 PM   #14
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Well, she seems very obsessed with her lack of money. She's only 23 so I'd hardly expect her to be wealthy. I don't know what to say, except maybe be leery that she's building you up to pay for everything if you continue to date her?? This is an odd one.
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Old 9th November 2017, 7:38 PM   #15
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Instead of asking when she's free, maybe be more specific and suggest a day, time, and activity.

Her response and if she suggests an alternate day (if she's not free on the day you suggest) will tell you if she's interested.
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