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Guys, do you put your income on dating sites??


AltarsofMadness

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AltarsofMadness

have you experimented with putting it on there and not putting in on there in terms of what kind of messages and responses you get?

 

 

I want to try online dating and I'm curious if I should put that on there but I'm scared of getting messages from the right kind of people. I am 28 years old for reference sake

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AltarsofMadness
Do you put your income on FB too?

 

 

I don't have facebook

 

 

I was talking more about match.com and other similar sites, I know they have a field for income

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so the last women I dated, we talked about OLD.

 

She was fresh out divorce. Anyway, her friends were like get back out there.

 

she hesitated, so they came over, built her profile, and searched by income

 

true story

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AltarsofMadness
so the last women I dated, we talked about OLD.

 

She was fresh out divorce. Anyway, her friends were like get back out there.

 

she hesitated, so they came over, built her profile, and searched by income

 

true story

 

 

I'm a 28 year old looking for quality women in mid 20s

 

 

Does putting a strong income on those sites help reach that goal?

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Putting your income on there will help because it will open you up to all of the women who filter or search by income. It will be up to you to determine whether the individual women you encounter are the right or wrong type. There are a lot of women out there who earn a high salary and they want men who earn the same or more. You should be wary of women who have a significant disparity between their income and the income requirements of the man she wants to date. For example, women who make under $35,000 who want men making $150,000 should be avoided.

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Cookiesandough

I had no idea there was even a place to put that

Edited by Cookiesandough
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1. Avoid OLD and get better at meeting women in person.

 

2. After ignoring the very valuable info above: Yes put income on there, and make it a little bit higher if you're a typical middle class type. In other words, pick the highest amount that she would believe when she meets you. If you make 50k, you can easily say 75k and it would be believable.

 

Why? Experiments showed that women rated wealthy men as more physically attractive than the exact same person shown with a lower income.

 

It's only fair. Men choose women on physical appearance and women mislead on those issues all the time: makeup, high heels, pushup bras, dyed hair, lying about their age, and calling their weight "average" when they are obese by definition. Not to mention all the misleading pictures, close up face shots, and high vantage selfies that hide their bellies.

 

The mating game is not a level playing field so learn to play it effectively.

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AltarsofMadness
1. Avoid OLD and get better at meeting women in person.

 

2. After ignoring the very valuable info above: Yes put income on there, and make it a little bit higher if you're a typical middle class type. In other words, pick the highest amount that she would believe when she meets you. If you make 50k, you can easily say 75k and it would be believable.

 

Why? Experiments showed that women rated wealthy men as more physically attractive than the exact same person shown with a lower income.

 

It's only fair. Men choose women on physical appearance and women mislead on those issues all the time: makeup, high heels, pushup bras, dyed hair, lying about their age, and calling their weight "average" when they are obese by definition. Not to mention all the misleading pictures, close up face shots, and high vantage selfies that hide their bellies.

 

The mating game is not a level playing field so learn to play it effectively.

 

 

I make 160K

 

 

I've had horrible luck meeting women in person. I can't get anybody who would be a good fit for me to actually want to go out with me (I'm looking for an attractive and in shape 20 something woman with no kids, a decent job and a good head on her shoulders. I'm attractive and in shape also)

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have you experimented with putting it on there and not putting in on there in terms of what kind of messages and responses you get?

 

 

I want to try online dating and I'm curious if I should put that on there but I'm scared of getting messages from the right kind of people. I am 28 years old for reference sake

 

Doesn't matter because if you do the West Africans will contact you. Local woman don't care much. It's not about the money it's about you. Mean selfish woman might like to hear about your money. I say no to dating sites and FB to tell the woman about your money.

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I had no idea there was even a place to put that

 

Yes my dear there is.. Mine wold be N/A It's about the love not the money.

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I don't have facebook

 

 

I was talking more about match.com and other similar sites, I know they have a field for income

 

Wow .... I was surprised to see that that site (and others) has a field to put your income in .... really??????

 

I would have thought that if someone put a, shall we say, rather healthy salary in that field then all the gold diggers would crawl out of their respective closets.

 

Maybe I am just naive?:)

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I would have thought that if someone put a, shall we say, rather healthy salary in that field then all the gold diggers would crawl out of their respective closets.
The last time I used Match, the highest option was $150,000+. Thus, you can't advertise yourself as any higher than that. When I experimented with that option, I did get more initial messages from women. It was a mixture of high-earning women looking for high-earning men and gold-diggers.
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I make 160K

I've had horrible luck meeting women in person. I can't get anybody who would be a good fit for me to actually want to go out with me (I'm looking for an attractive and in shape 20 something woman with no kids, a decent job and a good head on her shoulders. I'm attractive and in shape also)

 

Women don't like to date down. So definitely put your income up. There are plenty of women making good money like you that refuse to date middle income guys.

 

It goes without saying that women who are just interested in money will bounce if you don't give them any.

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I pulled my income off of sites for awhile as I wasted my time trying to establish dates with two women who either said we weren't "financially compatible" or stated that "our lifestyles wouldn't mesh because of the income discrepancy".

 

Both of these conversations happened via Match, I had been talking to these women for a few days and I was just irritated that my time had been wasted. One woman did make significantly more money than I do but the other one was only on tier higher. For all she knew, she was only making $10k more per year than me. I understand women needing to be able to thin the herd a bit when using OLD but they shouldn't have responded to my messages if income was going to be an issue. I imagine they saw my education level and assumed that I make far more than I do. But I do specify that I'm a teacher in my profile which means that I'm not making $75+ per year. At least not in this state..

 

I did notice a drop in response rate on Match when I pulled my income off of here but there was no difference on the other sites. I didn't have women bring up my salary on the other sites but it did happen on Match. But, that was just one of many issues I had with Match. I understand a woman who states that they like to travel and want to date someone who has the financial means to join them but there was certainly a disconnect from reality in other situations. I ran across quite a few women who were looking specifically for guys that had a salary two tiers above theirs which makes no sense.

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AltarsofMadness
The last time I used Match, the highest option was $150,000+. Thus, you can't advertise yourself as any higher than that. When I experimented with that option, I did get more initial messages from women. It was a mixture of high-earning women looking for high-earning men and gold-diggers.

 

 

high earning women sounds great, assuming they're attractive also and don't work a job with crazy hours

 

I've been making six figures since I was 24 so I'm in a very comfortable situational financially. Hopefully that will appeal to women I'm messaging

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heavenonearth

First off, I wonder why you only ask 'guys' this question? A bit sexist, to begin with.

 

Second, why would you give out this information to strangers? You set yourself up for disappointment. I am with my boyfriend for 4,5 months now, and I do not know how much he earns. I feel this is something you discuss if you decide to merge households.

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AltarsofMadness
First off, I wonder why you only ask 'guys' this question? A bit sexist, to begin with.

 

Second, why would you give out this information to strangers? You set yourself up for disappointment. I am with my boyfriend for 4,5 months now, and I do not know how much he earns. I feel this is something you discuss if you decide to merge households.

 

because women my age get a billion messages from ridiculously perfect men assuming they're halfway mediocre and not hideous. it doesn't really matter what they do with their profile

 

but me personally, I would love to meet a high income (70k+) woman. Not required but very much appreciated

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There should also be a DEBT category. Because, while my income pales in comparison to the high earners, I have zero debt and am rent and mortgage free. I can pretty much do what I want with whatever money I make, which doesn't have to be much. It's called winning. I don't have the big fancy house, but I never wanted it.

 

The kind of women who want a high income are the kind of women I have zero interest in. They like shopping, spending, shopping, spending.... I would either choose "prefer not to say" or the lowest income option. I am not my income, but I'm also a "one-off" so I'm not for everybody.

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high earning women sounds great, assuming they're attractive also and don't work a job with crazy hours

 

I've been making six figures since I was 24 so I'm in a very comfortable situational financially. Hopefully that will appeal to women I'm messaging

 

Leading with money is just plain unattractive. How many times have you mentioned income here since you've been back?

 

Oh wait, there's a while 'nother thread about it. :rolleyes:

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If you make your income the focus of your profile, then you will attract women who are attracted to that money. Not you. Your income. Your choice!

 

Agree with previous point about debt. I dont have a huge income, but my home is mortgage free and I have savings. Income doesn't mean much if you spend it all.

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Leading with money is just plain unattractive. How many times have you mentioned income here since you've been back?

 

Oh wait, there's a while 'nother thread about it. :rolleyes:

 

I have to agree, the OP seems hung up on money and physical beauty, and I am starting to wonder if there's a lack of character depth, a superficiality which is what's hampering his search for a partner.

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I am a guy. Do NOT put your income down.

 

Answering the general question...It has to be the WORST thing to lead with. If you have a high salary: Would you really want a woman to be interested in dating you where the primary reason is that you make a lot of money. The right woman just wants a guy who supports himself financially and maybe have some left over to go on vacation perhaps once a year or so. (And even this is debatable, there are a lot of women on and off this site who are pining over some dude who still lives in Mom's basement.) If you DON'T have a high salary, do you want to be mentioning this right out of the gate so that some woman who THINKS it is important to her doesn't even give meeting you a chance? If a woman is attracted to you in person she won't care about that.

 

Besides, getting to the OP's specific situation, leading with your money is so unattractive, as @MidwestUSA said. A good woman will be less likely want to go on a date with you because she may feel as if she was bribed into it.

 

Contact the women you are interested in, and your pictures showing that you lead a somewhat interesting life (which tends to imply that you make enough to support yourself and then some) should be plenty.

Edited by Imajerk17
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