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OLD... Just thought I would share


roserosin12

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I have been on eharmony for about a year. At the beginning I was getting about 7-10 messages a day and gradually it went down to 5-6 a day (smiles or messages). I was 31 when I joined OLD and had at least 3 guys asking "Are you really 31?" I was told I look early 20s.

Anyway, a week ago I turned 32 and the number of messages went down to 1 or 0 per day. And I havent changed anything on my profile (same two pics and same bio).

I can't help but think it is my age. Sad but I can't blame guys for their preferences.

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Huh?!? So of the 3500+ guys you matched with and who messaged you over the course of the year you were on the site, you didn't hit it off with a single one???:confused:

 

I hate to burst your bubble, but there's no difference between 31 and 32 in dating! It sounds as if you've been on the site long enough to have gone through the entire pool of guys were potential matches right now. Find other ways of meeting guys and/or try OLD at New Year's when everyone makes their resolutions to get serious about finding someone and floods OLD.

 

That being said, it sounds as if there may be other, more pertinent issues afoot if you have interacted with that many guys, and not one stuck. It's not age or not matching with enough guys.

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Huh?!? So of the 3500+ guys you matched with and who messaged you over the course of the year you were on the site, you didn't hit it off with a single one???:confused:

 

I hate to burst your bubble, but there's no difference between 31 and 32 in dating! It sounds as if you've been on the site long enough to have gone through the entire pool of guys were potential matches right now. Find other ways of meeting guys and/or try OLD at New Year's when everyone makes their resolutions to get serious about finding someone and floods OLD.

 

That being said, it sounds as if there may be other, more pertinent issues afoot if you have interacted with that many guys, and not one stuck. It's not age or not matching with enough guys.

 

I just find it odd that all the messages stopped exactly a day after my bday. Yes, I only went out with one guy but didn't exactly like him. I had two more guys I was interested in but thought they were just too good for me and it was also the busiest three months of my life and I just never went out with either of them.

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CautiouslyOptimistic
I have been on eharmony for about a year. At the beginning I was getting about 7-10 messages a day and gradually it went down to 5-6 a day (smiles or messages). I was 31 when I joined OLD and had at least 3 guys asking "Are you really 31?" I was told I look early 20s.

Anyway, a week ago I turned 32 and the number of messages went down to 1 or 0 per day. And I havent changed anything on my profile (same two pics and same bio).

I can't help but think it is my age. Sad but I can't blame guys for their preferences.

 

 

You must live in a major metropolitan area to even get 5 or 6 messages a day at eHarmony after the first month or two.

 

I HIGHLY doubt it has to do with you being the old age of 32. Probably a fluke. If you're missing the attention, upload a new pic. That always catches people's eye.

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You must live in a major metropolitan area to even get 5 or 6 messages a day at eHarmony after the first month or two.

 

I HIGHLY doubt it has to do with you being the old age of 32. Probably a fluke. If you're missing the attention, upload a new pic. That always catches people's eye.

 

 

Yes, I live in Chicago. I am not even sure I have the time to date right now. I am still on OLD hoping that I will miraculously match with the ONE and I would find some time for him.

I just realized that I will finally have more time to date in about 8 months, and then I will be closer to 33. Life is never boring :laugh:

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CautiouslyOptimistic
Yes, I live in Chicago. I am not even sure I have the time to date right now. I am still on OLD hoping that I will miraculously match with the ONE and I would find some time for him.

I just realized that I will finally have more time to date in about 8 months, and then I will be closer to 33. Life is never boring :laugh:

 

Well, even 33 is not old :). But I guess it depends on what age group you are after. What's your ideal age in a man?

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Well, even 33 is not old :). But I guess it depends on what age group you are after. What's your ideal age in a man?

I would say few years younger is ok and then up to maybe up to 42. The oldest guy I ever dated just turned 39.

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Thatoneguy55

This is unfortunately another imbalance in the male/female experience. As a male, my early 30s (30-33) have been my dating prime, and have dated women from 23-41.

 

And yes, if the site has a filter, and one of the brackets splits right at those years, it could easily explain a reduction in contacts.

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This is unfortunately another imbalance in the male/female experience. As a male, my early 30s (30-33) have been my dating prime, and have dated women from 23-41.

 

And yes, if the site has a filter, and one of the brackets splits right at those years, it could easily explain a reduction in contacts.

 

I think you nailed it.

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Yes, I was thinking that many guys might have 31 as their age limit.

 

Wow, that's depressing!

 

Indeed :(

On the positive side, guys who set 31 as age limit are probably around 26-28. Too young anyway :D

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Yes, I was thinking that many guys might have 31 as their age limit.

 

Wow, that's depressing!

 

That's pretty bad. I have 40 as my limit and also noticed the number of messages goes down the longer I've been online. Not that I was getting that many. I've only gotten a handful of messages where the woman initiates.

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Cookiesandough
Excuse me?

 

Sorry, I was just joking around.. I find it so hard to believe that many would drop off at 32 vs 31 though. I can see 35 being sharper but still not that extreme. Are you certain you just didn't cycle through most of the guys by being on there a year

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mortensorchid

I did EHarmony twice and said I never would again, and have stuck to that principal. It's an expensive way to talk to people. Honestly I think I have had the most luck on the paid websites with Match in the volume of people I have chatted with / met face to face.

 

I don't think your age has much to do with it. With any of the websites (free or paid) I think you get a large volume of people at first trafficking your profile as "the new girl/guy", then it will drop off substantially after a few weeks. As for the quality of person you meet? Well that's all relative.

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I just find it odd that all the messages stopped exactly a day after my bday. Yes, I only went out with one guy but didn't exactly like him. I had two more guys I was interested in but thought they were just too good for me and it was also the busiest three months of my life and I just never went out with either of them.

 

Girl there is not an endless stream of single men in your area. Like the above poster said, you most likely went through a lot of them...a lot have already messaged you! why do you not go back through those guys and message the ones you like?

 

YOU can also go online and look through profiles you like and message. I am 28 and I am private so have message men, I found from OD for a while the same guys on their so the picking do get less. Unlikely be your age.

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Oh my, i started to dip back to OLD and I'm 36. My age bracket preferences are from 30-45 my max.. I don't think I'm ugly by no means lol.. I get tons of messages BUT NO ONE remotely close to my age. I kept getting 50 and OLDER and I don't know why... I joined match.com and I kept getting men outside my bracket. Those who are my match are not physically attractive, and have bunches of lil ones. I don't have any kids so I don't think I'm equipped to deal with someone with lots of kids. But givenguys around my age, they're divorced with lil ones. Anyhow, my gf think it's one of my pics is drawing the older men. I love golf, and I have a pic of me golfing. My gf said only old men golf so that's why you are attracting them... lol.. I'm going to removed it and see if my result gets any better... OLD sucks

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