Ask women out at a grocery store?

[max3732]

Basically the only place I've ever run into women that are around my age and that at least physically looking like what I'm after are at the grocery store and at restaurants. Just today I saw someone shopping that was absolutely gorgeous and I didn't see any ring. I'm trying OLD, but not having much luck.

 

Obviously it would make sense to ask about something she's looking at or in her cart, but I couldn't come up with anything. She wasn't buying some kind of exotic food where I could ask an obvious question. If she's buying things like meat, eggs, milk etc what am I supposed to say? How do you like your eggs cooked, scrambled or poached?

 

The only time I've talked to someone attractive at the store was when I was waiting at the deli and she tried something I'd never had before. I asked her how it was and the kinds of sandwiches she likes, but then her friend came and said "nice talking to you" before walking away.

 

Maybe it's looking ahead here, but even if I were able to strike up a conversation, what do I say to keep the conversation going and get her # or ask her out? Another issue is that in my mid 30's already and a lot of the people shopping are college students. I look like I could be 20, but if I ask someone out and she's 22 it would be pretty awkward. I'm also terrible at figuring out how old people are.

[d0nnivain]

That type of ask has to be immediate. Does the grocery store have a "restaurant" inside it where you can get something to eat or a cup of coffee? Offer to buy her a drink right then & there or at least at the Starbucks next door. Chat with her then & there then ask about phone #s & future dates.

[Gaeta]

I got approached in an electronic store and in the metro. They didn't try to start a conversation they just said : Hi, I think you look lovely may I ask if you are single?. If the guy was to my liking I smiled back and answered yes indeed I am single, if the guy was not to my liking I simply said sorry I'm taken.

[Cookiesandough]

Find something in the environment to ask her questions about. Like what is that, have you had it before, how do you prepare it, people actually eat that? Then after just be like I'm full of **** I just wanted excuse to talk to you. Ask for her name, introduce yourself, tell her you want to take her out for drinks, ask when is she free, profit

[Doublegold]

Yes, go for it! Beats being approached by a drunk in a bar!

 

I was recently approached in a store by a really nice guy. I had been having a difficult day as it was the anniversary of a death in my family. He really brightened my day.

[RecentChange]

You know....

 

One time I was at the store, shopping (picking out yogurt, titillating!)

 

And out of the corner of my eye I catch this guy looking at me, and he confidently walked right up to me - I though FOR SURE he was going to ask me if I know where "xyz is" (as it seems like I often get lost looking guys asking me where things are - is this a pick up line I missed?! )

 

Any way, he walks up and says "Hi, this may be forward, but I think you are beautiful, and I wondered if I could get your number"

 

I was totally flattered, and first had to tell him, that, and that I am married (rings weren't on) - but I gave him props for being bold.

 

If I was single, eh, I may have agreed to coffee.

 

The one thing that I don't get with these things - I guess I understand that its physical attraction that opens the door for men, but I couldn't imagine wanting to date someone just because I thought they looked good.

 

I always felt like my personality was my biggest asset, so it seems weird to me to get asked out, before someone has any idea WHO I am.

 

Get asked out after a good conversation at a bar or social event, sure makes sense - but the absolute cold call? Eh... kinda a turn off.

[thefooloftheyear]

Look in her cart....If she has some cantaloupes,. Tell her she has some nice melons...:laugh:

 

TFY

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

The one thing that I don't get with these things - I guess I understand that its physical attraction that opens the door for men, but I couldn't imagine wanting to date someone just because I thought they looked good.

 

I totally agree.

 

However, I do very much appreciate a sincere (not creepy) compliment out of the blue from someone if they do NOT ask for my number or attempt any other communication. It seems more genuine. This post made me remember a time it happened in a frozen food aisle. It was actually very sweet.

[jay1983]

You can just ask her a random question. Doesn't really matter what it's about. Grab a bag of Starbucks and a bag of Duncan and ask her which she prefers. Whether she picks one or tells you she's never used either doesn't matter, the way she responds is what'll give you the green light. If she looks at you, smiles and says sorry I don't drink coffee, that's good, because you can deviate and flirt. If she says I like Starbucks with a faceless expression and goes back to her business, that means she's not interested in talking.

[Robratory]

Obviously it would make sense to ask about something she's looking at or in her cart, but I couldn't come up with anything. She wasn't buying some kind of exotic food where I could ask an obvious question. If she's buying things like meat, eggs, milk etc what am I supposed to say? How do you like your eggs cooked, scrambled or poached?

 

Actually, mentioning something in her cart may not be the best idea. For reasons you can't even imagine, it might make her self-conscious, which will absolutely kill the introduction. You're like, "How do you like your eggs?" and she's thinking, "OMG, that big box of Tampax is right next to the eggs!"

 

I know it's thin line to walk. On the one hand, it has to be natural and not contrived, but on the other hand, you have to make it happen or it never will. It's a numbers game too, which is to say it's pretty random, but at the same time, you need to tell with some accuracy where you might be welcome and where you might not. And it only makes it harder when we overthink things and get all self-conscious and nervous.

 

It sounds like you already keep an eye out, so now try to look for opportunities. They do present themselves. They're those situations where you look back later and wonder why you didn't act, or why you didn't say something.

 

Also, smile if your eyes happen to meet. You're pushing your cart. She's blocking the aisle. You wait for her to move, and when she looks up, you make eye contact and smile at her. She might immediately look away, and mumble, "Sorry!" and move, so you can figure she's not open to being approached. Don't bother. She'll just go home and complain that some creep kept talking to her at the supermarket.

 

But she might smile back and say, "Oh, look at me! Just standing there in the middle of the road! Ha, ha, ha!" In that case, if you brush past her and keep on going, later on you're going to be thinking, "Man, I could have said something..."

[mortensorchid]

Grocery store? Someone was telling me that since the advent of Whole Foods that it brought back the whole cruising or being cruised while grocery shopping. I thought that was a thing of the past myself. Or maybe I am just out of the loop because I'm over the hill now, which I am technically.

 

Having never been part of said situation, nor witnessing this take place, I say go for it if you at least think the woman before you is attractive. LIke you said in another situation, the one gal walked off and said nice talking to you. What do you have to loose? If nothing you will chat with each other for a few minutes.

 

Although now that I think of it, there was one time I was in a very similar situation many years ago. When I was in my early twenties I thought this guy who worked in a store in the mall was cute, I walked up and introduced myself while he was on a break in the food court. We talked for a bit, he was clearly not interested at the end of it. ANd I said I would never do that again. And I haven't, as far as I know.

[Bastile]

Just tell her that you noticed her whilst you were looking for a sandwich, you thought she looked really nice and had to say hello.

 

Takes balls, but it cuts out any sort of weird vibe. Like "why is this guy talking to me?".

 

Follow up with something social: "you have a very professional look, like maybe you are a lawyer or something?".

 

So impose on her in a masculine (but nice) way, and then enjoy being social.

 

Crazy how much you can get to know someone in just 5 minutes. For example, there was a woman I met recently that I know where she works, what her aspirations are, how her family came to the UK, what she enjoys doing, etc. And that was just a rejection that went nowhere really.

Edited August 31, 2017 by Bastile

[Popsicle]

I got approached in an electronic store and in the metro. They didn't try to start a conversation they just said : Hi, I think you look lovely may I ask if you are single?. If the guy was to my liking I smiled back and answered yes indeed I am single, if the guy was not to my liking I simply said sorry I'm taken.

 

Thanks for the tip! I was just wondering a few days ago what I could say to a guy I saw in the grocery store who I wanted to talk to. I think this is the best way. To start making small talk is too risky. They may just think you're being friendly and most people are in a rush to get out of there anyway. This gets right to the point.

 

Sadly, in this town I live in, the grocery store is the only place I see men who are alone and not have a woman or a kid at his side.

[lurker74]

Grocery stores are a hard place to connect. It's too bad because it's a great place to potentially find someone that is responsible assuming the cart isn't full of Gatorade and funyans.

 

I had one successful encounter and I initially played the dude in distress card. When I was the in same same aisle, I asked her for help with a rice packet.

 

"Miss? I'm sorry, I'm not a very good cook. Can you tell me what I'd need to make this?"

 

She said sure, was reading the back of the packet, and I said when she was done,

 

"Actually it turns out that I'm a good cook but I couldn't think of anything else to broach talking to you."

 

We talked for a couple more minutes and I asked if she wanted to grab a cup of coffee. She did and we dated for a while before it turned out she wasn't over her ex.

 

Still worth it and though it was scary, it was also fun.

[CryForNoOne]

I'm not sure if this is meaningful advice, as it sort of happened without intent, but I did just pickup someone last week in the produce section at Trader Joes. It was very spontaneous and totally unplanned. We were both going for napa cabbage and I definitely noticed her as she was very attractive. I saw her cart had no meat or dairy so I just blurted out with a smile "Vegan?" To which she smiled and replied "Yes. I'm going vegan for the month of August." I asked "How's that going?" to which she replied, "I'm actually writing a blog about it." I asked her if I could check out her blog but she said it was also a lifestyle blog and she was very self-conscious about it and wasn't ready to share it with a complete stranger. I asked if it was a public blog and she said yes so I teased her that complete strangers were already viewing it. She said "That's different." I knew as long as she didn't have a boyfriend I was going to get her number because I had already gotten her on the defensive in a blushing kind of way. I asked if she had been to this great Vegan Thai place nearby, and she said no so I offered to take he to lunch there. She accepted. Boom. Two weeks later now and we're going on our third date tonight.

 

So I've never done the "I think you're beautiful, can I take you out sometime" cold approach, and most beautiful women I've talked to said it happens to them but rarely and they would say yes in a heartbeat if they were single and the guy was good looking. But I have gotten good at the small talk approach. I have a pretty good sense of humor and have always been able to make women I dated laugh. When I was younger, the hard part was getting them to date me. I used to hold back around strangers because I was afraid that they might not get my joke or be offended by it. That slight moment of hesitation killed the spontaneity of it and the moment passed. I will say - TIMING IS EVERYTHING. Well now, I've forced myself to just blurt things out to strangers when they come to mind. It doesn't matter if they are old, young, male, female, pretty, ugly. I just say it. It has gradually become second nature. Sometimes I get a negative reaction or none at all, but who cares. The positive reactions sometimes lead to a connections that would have never happened otherwise.

 

I remember a friend from my 20's I've lost touch with but he was a "player" in every sense. One thing he taught me was to "always be prepared and always be practicing your game". He would hit on women 24/7. If we were at Subway, he'd compliment the mousey immigrant girl behind the cash register who barely spoke English. Afterwards, I'd glare at him and he'd say "I like to stay in practice and I probably made her day." When we went out at night, he always carried gum, cigarettes, and a lighter even though he didn't smoke. He said they are great conversation starters. I'll never adopt his MO. That's not my style but he made a strong impression on me and probably helped me develop my style which works for me...

Edited August 31, 2017 by CryForNoOne

[Popsicle]

How many people do you see standing around chatting in the grocery store? In my area, hardly none. It's somewhat crowded When I go and people are trying to keep it moving and get out of there.

 

The only way I'd do a cold approach using small talk is if i see them in a place where they are stuck there for a while (i.e sitting at a bar, cafe, class, concert, restaurant, waiting for an appointment). Otherwise, If they are just passing through with purpose, I'd go right in for the quick and direct route.

[thefooloftheyear]

It will soon be time(or is it now?) where all the women huddle around the bushel of picked corn and husk it themselves..They are elbow to elbow, just going at it like mad..Might be a good chance to get in there and mix it up with them ladies..

 

TFY

[smackie9]

It will soon be time(or is it now?) where all the women huddle around the bushel of picked corn and husk it themselves..They are elbow to elbow, just going at it like mad..Might be a good chance to get in there and mix it up with them ladies..

 

TFY

Grab one and say, "Yup, that's about the size of it!"

[smackie9]

You can start off with saying "I don't normally do this but....." This will make them feel special, that you are going out of your way because of them.

[WaitingForBardot]

It can be done, even in the reverse. A few years ago I was in a Target and this woman struck up a conversation with me about bathroom cleaning supplies. While we were talking I tried to call her attention to my wedding band by scratching my nose and generally putting it in her face, but she was oblivious. She then asked if I wanted to go grab a cup of coffee. I said sure, but I'd have to get some money from my wife in another part of the store, and she said...

 

...Okay, I'll wait here...

 

I did admire her persistence in the face of adversity... ..lol..

[morrowrd]

I think it's a bad idea. Times have changed, and approaching women in the store, (and I include hitting on those poor cashiers who are polite because it's their job), I feel is intrusive. Most people use social media or dating sites nowdays to find singles - following women around in the store trying to start a conversation just so you can try and get a phone number or a date, is pathetic and at times, creepy.

 

When I was a kid, picking up girls was exactly the way you did it. You'd follow them in the mall, usually groups of girls, and if they kept turning around and smiling, you knew it was ok to approach them. That is not how things are done today... with all the awareness about keeping safe, it's not really the best way to meet someone. Although, if opportunity knocks - for example you're in the store and for whatever reason a conversation happens, while waiting in line, or whatever, and a natural procession of events takes place and you become acquainted - (black friday comes to mind and that kind of opportunity) then maybe it's possible.

 

Some jackass tried to pick up my girlfriend while we were shopping at walmart. I left her for a few minutes to go to another isle to grab some cheese and other ingredients we forgot to get when we went passed there - as I was walking towards her, I could tell she was uncomfortable, and looked relieved to see me. The guy must have seen her looking elsewhere, turned around and saw me walking purposefully and I made eye contact with him. He disappeared quickly. I've warned her a few times when she shared about stuff like that happening at the store...these "nice guys" helping her. I asked her, how many women have been helpful and that attentive? Nope, all men lol.

 

This isn't the 70's anymore...hell I think even that was ok in the 80's. Society is different now though. I'm old fashioned though, and feel women are more vulnerable than men when it comes to being hit on. How many women have hit on me in the last year at the store? Yep, none.

Edited August 31, 2017 by morrowrd

[Bastile]

How many women have hit on me in the last year at the store? Yep, none.

 

I'm telling you straight that I'm a very attractive lad that gets a lot of attention from women. But women's attention is more subtle.

 

So, define "women hitting on me".

 

I have had wolf whistles. Still isn't being hit on for the purposes of a male now is it?

 

Men are the doms, and woman are the subs. Women just give lights, and we have to take our place as kings.

 

Take your rightful place, or give it to a more dominant male. It's as simple as that.

[morrowrd]

I'm telling you straight that I'm a very attractive lad that gets a lot of attention from women. But women's attention is more subtle.

 

So, define "women hitting on me".

 

I have had wolf whistles. Still isn't being hit on for the purposes of a male now is it?

 

Men are the doms, and woman are the subs. Women just give lights, and we have to take our place as kings.

 

Take your rightful place, or give it to a more dominant male. It's as simple as that.

 

you're a minority.

[smackie9]

Guys still say hi to me or try to get my attention while I'm buying groceries, so being approached at a store is still alive and well. It happens at the small stores/markets, not the big box stores.

[Bastile]

you're a minority.

 

How so, Sir?