Her massive cleavage is distracting me from getting to know her

[Reltubsirch0412]

I'm dating an attractive woman with large breasts — and both times we've gone out she's wore low-cut tops with and shown a delicious amount of cleavage.

 

Sounds like a good problem to have, right?

 

I'm not so sure.

 

I'm trying to really get to know this woman and to see if there's chemistry there. Our first phone call we really got to know each other on a mental level, and I enjoyed the call. I meet her in person and the sight of those amazing breasts made me a lot more flirtatious and frisky than I otherwise would have acted. By the way, I was always more of a butt guy, but this woman has breasts (and a body) like Kate Upton, and when they're that big and nice I totally forget I'm a butt guy.

 

This woman seems emotionally mature and very sweet and intelligent. I've dated a lot of women who didn't have those qualities. This is also not a woman who dates regularly, from what I've gathered. I'm almost 40. She's about 37. At my age I want an emotional connection as well as a physical one, because that's the only way it's gonna work out.

 

We've had two dates so far. One Friday night and another yesterday. The date Friday night — over dinner —*went well. My physical attraction to her made me more flirty than I usually am. I could tell she was attracted to me. We even kissed and cuddled a little at the end of the date....and when she presses her big boobs up against my chest....no words to describe how nice that felt.

 

Yesterday, we went to a festival. It was OK. She didn't seem as flirtatious with me as she was Friday night. I chalk that up to the fact that the weather was hot. The festival was crowded and didn't have a lot of interesting things going on. The mood for being flirtatious with one another just doesn't seem right, I suppose.

 

Both times she wore a low-cut top, and all I could think about were her boobs. All I could think about was how much I wanted to get her alone and undress her, motor-boat her, play with those breasts, grind her in bed, etc. I took a few quick glances at her cleavage. I never stared more than a fraction of a second or two. You'd think at my age, and you'd think with as many women as I've already been intimate with, that I just wouldn't be a walking h*rd-on, but with her I am.

 

We've set another date for later this week.

 

I'm afraid if I see her in another low-cut top that the beast in me is gonna come out. I'll try to initiate sex with her. She'll kick me to the curb, I'm afraid, because she thinks I'm only out for one thing.

 

But....if she didn't wear those low-cut tops then my mind would be more focused on getting to know her as a person.

 

Based on the pics in her profile photo, I think she wears cleavage-revealing clothes often, at least when she's in her street clothes. I'm not 100 percent sure she's dressing this way just for me. But she has such a conservative temperament.

 

Any advice you can offer me?

 

Do you think she's doing this on purpose? If so, what's her game plan?

 

And what is the best way for me to handle this?

 

Yes, I realize I am probably overanalyzing this, but I don't want to do something stupid to screw this up.

[BaileyB]

What a great opportunity for you to practice self control. Seriously.

 

Keep your eyes up. Keep your hands to yourself. And get to know the woman...

[SevenCity]

I've never met a woman who had issue with me escalating to sex as I know when to stop and when to move forward. As long as you read her queues she'll respect you more. Don't be upset if she stops things - that will give her the impression you are only after sex.

 

Was the festival during the day? If so bad idea. Night time is for romance - keep your dates in the evening until she's fallen for you.

 

I think most people are infatuated at first with a new partner (i.e.: honeymoon period). You date and have sex and then start to get to know them. The person she is now is likely not the real her. That will come out in time.

 

I say move forward and have sex and then decide how you like her. What's the worst that can happen? You have sex for a few weeks with a hot chick? There are worse things in life....

[preraph]

If she's showing her boobs on social media and showing them going out, she's pretty much showing them to everyone and my guess is her whole self-esteem is tied to her boobs or she wouldn't be doing that and would be dressing more appropriately and trying to find someone who wasn't just interested in her boobs. You can't tell her how to dress, however, so you just have to pace yourself and decide if she's someone you really like or it's all just boobs.

 

If you want to find out just how appropriate she is or isn't, tell her you're taking her someplace like the zoo where there will be kids and families around and see if she still shows too much or if she uses good judgment and covers em up.

[Chilli]

Haha ,crackin up.

Ya just get to know the twins first and get back to her later. plan :laugh:

[lovephule]

Ask her to wear a burqa for your next date.

[Cookiesandough]

Lmao. Sorry I have nothing more to add

[CptInsano]

I doubt that this woman is not aware of what showing off cleavage to guys does. She probably enjoys the attention, and if she keeps on showing off cleavage while going out with you I would assume that she is enjoying your reaction too, otherwise she wouldn't do it.

 

Maybe she is not quite as conservative as you think. Just because she is mature, sweet, and intelligent doesn't mean that she isn't in touch with her sensual side.

 

How to handle hit? Have you kissed yet? If she responds positively to non-verbal communication then you have your answer.

[Reltubsirch0412]

 

Was the festival during the day? If so bad idea. Night time is for romance - keep your dates in the evening until she's fallen for you.

 

Yes. And she wants our next date to be at lunch time. Think I should insist we meet in the evenings only?

[Reltubsirch0412]

Have you kissed yet? If she responds positively to non-verbal communication then you have your answer.

 

Yes. At the end of the first date, when we had dinner together. She seemed to handle it well. She seemed kinda so-so at the end of the second date, although that second date was at 2 p.m. in the afternoon, outside on a hot day in the South.

[basil67]

Yes. And she wants our next date to be at lunch time. Think I should insist we meet in the evenings only?

 

Whoa there. *Insisting* makes you look like a control freak. *Evenings only* makes you look inflexible. The whole plan would generally be a bad look for you.

 

Go to her lunchtime suggestion and then you come up with plans for the next date.

[coolheadal]

I'm dating an attractive woman with large breasts — and both times we've gone out she's wore low-cut tops with and shown a delicious amount of cleavage.

 

Sounds like a good problem to have, right?

 

I'm not so sure.

 

I'm trying to really get to know this woman and to see if there's chemistry there. Our first phone call we really got to know each other on a mental level, and I enjoyed the call. I meet her in person and the sight of those amazing breasts made me a lot more flirtatious and frisky than I otherwise would have acted. By the way, I was always more of a butt guy, but this woman has breasts (and a body) like Kate Upton, and when they're that big and nice I totally forget I'm a butt guy.

 

This woman seems emotionally mature and very sweet and intelligent. I've dated a lot of women who didn't have those qualities. This is also not a woman who dates regularly, from what I've gathered. I'm almost 40. She's about 37. At my age I want an emotional connection as well as a physical one, because that's the only way it's gonna work out.

 

We've had two dates so far. One Friday night and another yesterday. The date Friday night — over dinner —*went well. My physical attraction to her made me more flirty than I usually am. I could tell she was attracted to me. We even kissed and cuddled a little at the end of the date....and when she presses her big boobs up against my chest....no words to describe how nice that felt.

 

Yesterday, we went to a festival. It was OK. She didn't seem as flirtatious with me as she was Friday night. I chalk that up to the fact that the weather was hot. The festival was crowded and didn't have a lot of interesting things going on. The mood for being flirtatious with one another just doesn't seem right, I suppose.

 

Both times she wore a low-cut top, and all I could think about were her boobs. All I could think about was how much I wanted to get her alone and undress her, motor-boat her, play with those breasts, grind her in bed, etc. I took a few quick glances at her cleavage. I never stared more than a fraction of a second or two. You'd think at my age, and you'd think with as many women as I've already been intimate with, that I just wouldn't be a walking h*rd-on, but with her I am.

 

We've set another date for later this week.

 

I'm afraid if I see her in another low-cut top that the beast in me is gonna come out. I'll try to initiate sex with her. She'll kick me to the curb, I'm afraid, because she thinks I'm only out for one thing.

 

But....if she didn't wear those low-cut tops then my mind would be more focused on getting to know her as a person.

 

Based on the pics in her profile photo, I think she wears cleavage-revealing clothes often, at least when she's in her street clothes. I'm not 100 percent sure she's dressing this way just for me. But she has such a conservative temperament.

 

Any advice you can offer me?

 

Do you think she's doing this on purpose? If so, what's her game plan?

 

And what is the best way for me to handle this?

 

Yes, I realize I am probably overanalyzing this, but I don't want to do something stupid to screw this up.

 

I must say this much I really have enjoyed reading this post. I am more of breast man and second would be the rear end (butt). But listen you have a wonderful woman here and she's 37, she's beautiful and gifted on top. Don't worry about the low cut tops if you are so much worried take her to Nike Outlet and get her nice sexy tennis outfit with sport bra. Make her even happier to know that her new man in her life wants to show his woman around in something he likes her to wear. Stop showing your ego off like this. You know you like how she dresses the fact is you can't handle it. Wait sex comes you'll have fun with the b's as well as her. Your into her remember that and stop glazing at the b's. She likes you and you like her. There you go got a real date, real future don't screw this one up like we all do sometimes.

I got to say my new gf has some big b's also I can control myself I have too. LOL But again that's me you can do the same control it man!

[stillafool]

Most of the women I know that have big boobs wear low cut tops to reveal their blessing. I think it is more comfortable for them to wear them and they all know it comes with instant attention.

[thefooloftheyear]

Most of the women I know that have big boobs wear low cut tops to reveal their blessing. I think it is more comfortable for them to wear them and they all know it comes with instant attention.

 

 

Smart women, that aren't looking for external validation, know how to keep them hidden...The only men they care about "enjoying" that view is a SO, and if they don't have one, they usually don't want to be seen as a pair of breasts before anything else they may offer..

 

They don't need the attention...They are no different than the idiot gym guys that wear skin tight t shirts in the winter..

 

Note to the OP,,,,before you get too excited/distracted, maybe you should see them in the flesh...Sometimes the dream is far superior to the reality..

 

 

TFY

Save

Edited August 21, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[kendahke]

stop taking her out and only go to her or your house.

 

If she says something, tell her that her putting her girls on display for the world to see makes you only think of getting her home and doing what you described, so you decided to not waste time and cut to the chase.

[kendahke]

Most of the women I know that have big boobs wear low cut tops to reveal their blessing. I think it is more comfortable for them to wear them and they all know it comes with instant attention.

 

Some of those women are after the attention because they don't feel they have any other redeeming quality that could catch and hold a man. They've learned from the past when they were young that they could manipulate men with them, and the men have not failed on that point.

[Larryville]

Smart women, that aren't looking for external validation, know how to keep them hidden..

 

Absolutely. Ex wife had 44DDD but always dressed professionally and on dates was reserved. However she was a very smart (Mensa smart), accomplished person, funny had a glowing personality her breasts hardly needed to be on display for me to be attracted to her.

[BaileyB]

Most of the women I know that have big boobs wear low cut tops to reveal their blessing. I think it is more comfortable for them to wear them and they all know it comes with instant attention.

 

It's not more comfortable to wear a low cut top. Comfort has nothing to do with it.

 

If anything, women with a larger chest need more support, not less, to be comfortable. Some women with larger chest are quite self conscious about the need to cover up.

 

The low cut top is definitely for attention. Which is fine, when it's done tastefully, in the right situation, with the right person... To each their own related to dress, but when it happens all the time and in inappropriate situations - that's when it's time to wonder if self-worth is related to the need to show off...

[Ruby Slippers]

Smart women, that aren't looking for external validation, know how to keep them hidden...The only men they care about "enjoying" that view is a SO, and if they don't have one, they usually don't want to be seen as a pair of breasts before anything else they may offer..

 

They don't need the attention...They are no different than the idiot gym guys that wear skin tight t shirts in the winter..

 

Note to the OP,,,,before you get too excited/distracted, maybe you should see them in the flesh...Sometimes the dream is far superior to the reality..

 

 

TFY

Totally agree. I have big ones but never flaunt my cleavage unless I want to stimulate someone. Personally, I don't have any interest in stimulating random dudes, and I learned a long time ago that if I show off my cleavage, lots of men and even teenage boys will stare. So I only show it off for a special guy, once I like him enough to feel that he's special. Even then, I make sure I have a wrap so I can conceal if we go to a more modest environment, place with kids, etc.

 

It's only natural to react to her the way she's presenting herself.

Save

Edited August 21, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[central]

What a great opportunity for you to practice self control. Seriously.

 

Keep your eyes up. Keep your hands to yourself. And get to know the woman...

 

Can't find it now, but there was a very recent report on a study that shows lack of romantic/sexual interest if you look at her eyes/face too much. If she's interested in you, she'll be subconsciously pleased if you look at her cleavage and hips, and occasionally look in her eyes when she's speaking.

 

 

Get to know her cleavage, and the rest will follow!

[d0nnivain]

It's a test.

 

 

She wants to know if you know what color her eyes are and what types of shoes she was wearing. I'm serious.

 

 

She is well aware of what she has & how she's flaunting it.

[LivingWaterPlease]

I believe it's very possible she doesn't realize how much cleavage she's showing.

 

I am personally more often than I'd like to be, challenged with wearing clothing that's modest due to a neckline that doesn't cover enough.

 

It's happened to me before that I saw a photo of myself that really embarrassed me because I had no idea so much of me was showing above the neckline of my dress.

 

She most likely finds tops she likes and wants to wear but there isn't much you can do with a large bust line when there's only so much room in the top of the dress, blouse or t-shirt. Yes, you can get a different more modest top that looks like something an old lady would wear but it's easy to just buy the cute one that's immodest because you want so badly to wear something fashionable.

 

This is not to say there are no cute young looking tops or styles, just that a large proportion of the attractive tops available are low cut!

 

Also, when you are looking into a mirror at home you can get a viewpoint that appears modest but a taller person will see a totally different view.

 

I'm trying to think of how you can deal with this. Seems you do have a challenge ahead of you!

Edited August 21, 2017 by LivingWaterPlease

[BaileyB]

Can't find it now, but there was a very recent report on a study that shows lack of romantic/sexual interest if you look at her eyes/face too much. If she's interested in you, she'll be subconsciously pleased if you look at her cleavage and hips, and occasionally look in her eyes when she's speaking.

 

 

Get to know her cleavage, and the rest will follow!

 

I believe that. If I bring out the girls, I want my guy to notice... And, I notice when he does...

 

I just don't want him to ONLY notice the girls. In the original post, there were a few sentences about how great the woman was... but, it was a rambling post on how great her cleavage is and how distracting it was during dates. Just trying to remind OP, a little sarcastically, to look up!

[S_A]

She presses her chest against yours when you hug on purpose btw. It's not exactly happening because it's an accident

[LivingWaterPlease]

She presses her chest against yours when you hug on purpose btw. It's not exactly happening because it's an accident

 

There are times when a hug happens and it's hard to keep your chest from pressing against the other person (male or female). Seems to me it might not be manipulative when she does this.

 

OP, please don't think this girl is doing this to try for attention or to try to manipulate you. Although she could be, it's also possible she's so used to having a large bust that she doesn't give it a lot of consideration in her life at times. Especially when she's so focused on you.