Daaanz Posted July 16, 2017 Share Posted July 16, 2017 So, this guy was cheating on his girlfriend with me, we were seeing each other about 3 months and then she found out. She went mental and called the police on him, accusing him of beating her up. The police haven't been in touch with him regarding it yet but apparently he isn't allowed back to his house. We were together about a week and then he told me he needed to go back to her just to get the police charges dropped. He hasn't done anything wrong so I keep saying to him, he doesn't need to go back to her, just give the police his side of the story. He's still promising me we will be together once this is sorted, telling me how in love he is with me and calling me every chance he gets when she isn't around, which I know is risky. The problem is, I am so so in love with this man. I would do absolutely anything for him, and I know the wise thing to do would probably be to walk away from this situation but I can't, I just want him. I want to believe that he will come back to me once this is sorted, and I think he will but there's still doubt in the back of my mind. I don't know what to do with myself, I'm struggling so bad with this situation. Please can anyone give me some advice? Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 16, 2017 Share Posted July 16, 2017 This is not a guy with whom you're going to be able to have a healthy, lasting relationship. He's not trustworthy. He's self-serving. And I think he's not being honest about this story with his girlfriend. If he hasn't even spoken to the police, how is it that he is not allowed back at their house? Unless he means she kicked him out? What are these charges he supposedly has against him, without even having spoken to law enforcement? Sorry girl, but I think he's full of BS. Forget him. He's not that in love with you or he'd already have dropped the ex for good. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
act00 Posted July 16, 2017 Share Posted July 16, 2017 My advice is to leave. Run...run fast...and don't look back. Did you know he had a girlfriend when you got involved with him? You walked straight into a minefield with eyes wide open if you knew he was in a relationship when you hooked up with him. Consequences. He will cheat on you next, after you spend buckets of money helping him extract himself from his current situation so that you can live happily ever after. I wonder if the accusations were false with this current girlfriend or true. What was the reason to call the police, the accusation, and need to "make nice" in order to get charges dropped? Did he hit her? Steal from her? What? No matter the circumstances, this dude is bad news. Walk away...run away. He won't choose you. He may choose you temporarily, but he'll find another chickie, and you will find yourself in the position that his current girlfriend is in right now; the one whose man is cheating and bumping uglies with some other woman. A tiger cannot change its stripes. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted July 16, 2017 Share Posted July 16, 2017 (edited) So, this guy was cheating on his girlfriend with me, we were seeing each other about 3 months and then she found out. She went mental and called the police on him, accusing him of beating her up. The police haven't been in touch with him regarding it yet but apparently he isn't allowed back to his house. We were together about a week and then he told me he needed to go back to her just to get the police charges dropped. He hasn't done anything wrong so I keep saying to him, he doesn't need to go back to her, just give the police his side of the story. He's still promising me we will be together once this is sorted, telling me how in love he is with me and calling me every chance he gets when she isn't around, which I know is risky. The problem is, I am so so in love with this man. I would do absolutely anything for him, and I know the wise thing to do would probably be to walk away from this situation but I can't, I just want him. I want to believe that he will come back to me once this is sorted, and I think he will but there's still doubt in the back of my mind. I don't know what to do with myself, I'm struggling so bad with this situation. Please can anyone give me some advice? He hasn't done anything wrong -- Except that he cheated on her. What she's doing is wrong too but he needs to own his contribution to the situation. And, if he cheated on her with you, he will cheat on you with someone else or even her again. Can you live with the thought that while he is back with her until the charges are dropped, that he isn't having to behave as though he is actually back with her -- i.e. being intimate, etc? She isn't going to drop the charges unless he's showing her what she wants . . . that he is sorry, still loves her and wants to be with her. If he can pull off that kind of a sham on her, I'd say your waiting to be with a manipulative, untrustworthy man . . . he's using two women. Edited July 16, 2017 by Redhead14 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted July 16, 2017 Share Posted July 16, 2017 He was playing away from home, he got caught. NO doubt she chucked him out, so he ran to you. Then as the dust cleared he has managed to get himself back to her again. I guess at the moment he is trying his hardest to make it up with her. This is only 3 months, so cut your losses and run, or you will still be here three years later moaning about how you are still the OW and how he now has a kid and another one on the way with her, but he loves you sooo much and is "definitely" leaving her, only not quite right now... Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted July 16, 2017 Share Posted July 16, 2017 He hasn't done anything wrong... except cheat on his girlfriend with you. But, you don't seem to have any problem with that either... Just remember, if he will do it with you, he will do it to you. Ask yourself, do you really want to date a man who has proven that he is a liar and a cheater? Do you really want to be involved in all this drama? Is there really nobody else that you could date... Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted July 16, 2017 Share Posted July 16, 2017 She went mental and called the police on him, accusing him of beating her up. The police haven't been in touch with him regarding it yet but apparently he isn't allowed back to his house. We were together about a week and then he told me he needed to go back to her just to get the police charges dropped. And you believed this bs? She called the police and they didn't do anything about him beating her up? Lie. Who told him he couldn't go back home? If he isn't allowed back home why is he going back? Why would he go back to a woman who lied to the police about him beating her up and why would the beat up ex take him back? How is his moving back going to get the charges dropped? OP, does any of that make sense to you? He has simply gone home to his ex gf who had kicked him out and now wants to get back together. Get over this guy because he is gone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts