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Always attracted to the odd ones out


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I'd like to start this thread by saying, that I have already learnt from my mistakes and past experiences, so I'm not gonna venture into another toxic relationship. I keep myself level.

 

But I think it will be far more efficient if I admitted those feelings that lurk inside of me - I only get attracted to really problematic, quirky, weird, troubled men. It gives me intense feelings to talk to someone who keeps me on edge. I'd like to know how to avoid that, because at this point I'd rather stay single for the rest of my life than get involved into another heartbreaking adventure. What is wrong with me though?

 

Let me give you an example of something that is kind of ongoing right now.

 

I started talking to this guy for about a month ago. He's a very distant relation, I think we share a common ancestor generations back. But somehow his family and mine still keep in touch. I met his parents once and they seem to have told this guy to contact me - which I thought was cool.

 

It started off really casually and I even invited him to visit me in my city. Now it has overgrown into a contact of an insane intensity. Like hours on phone and a lot of private conversations, with just hints of flirt, but nothing very serious. It seems like this person has huge emotional issues and despite the fact that he's got that quirky personality I'm usually so fond of, I know that getting involved with him would be a folly. I would be the biggest idiot on Earth.

 

But nevertheless I'm feeling this overwhelming excitement and attraction. This kind of intensity gives me butterflies and works like some kind of drug. Makes me think I'm also ridden by weird mental issues. I just can't help it. Normal men bore me. I don't know what went wrong in my life to be so drawn into unlikely men. Had pretty normal childhood, a couple of traumatic experiences in my early twenties, some minor anxiety issues, but that doesn't really explain everything.

Right now I'm pretty happy and calm and feeling stronger than ever. But still I can't just pretend I don't feel what I feel. My chemistry is on fire for that troubled man.

 

Well anyway, I know that I won't be foolish enough to date him, if it ever came to that, but I'd like to not feel this way about this kind of men. Anyone can relate? Or maybe someone who succeeded to fix their own attraction patterns? And don't suggest therapy please, it is impossible to get that here. Not even exaggerating.

 

How to become more attracted to normal, healthy men?

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Did you grow up in an unusual family and maybe you're attracted to men who have some of the same personality traits or habits? I mean, you did say this guy may even be a distant relative and knows your family. If you grow up with some weirdness, you will be drawn to some facet of it because it seems normal to you and you had to get the skills to deal with it, but it can be very unhealthy and is usually best rejected and rebelled against instead of letting it in.

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Did you grow up in an unusual family and maybe you're attracted to men who have some of the same personality traits or habits? I mean, you did say this guy may even be a distant relative and knows your family. If you grow up with some weirdness, you will be drawn to some facet of it because it seems normal to you and you had to get the skills to deal with it, but it can be very unhealthy and is usually best rejected and rebelled against instead of letting it in.

 

I didn't grow up seeing any weirdness. Was never sexually or mental abused and never saw any unconventional behavior while growing up. Cannot come up with a reason why I'm drawn to this, only that I enjoy the intensity. There was a time in my life, when I was younger, when I felt alone and abandoned. Maybe I misguidedly enjoy the attention that can only be given by someone not entirely normal. I don't know :/

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I think it's your own little way of sabotaging yourself because deep down you are not ready to settle in a healthy committed relationship.

 

When I started dating I was always going for the super hot men, the body builders type, the players, the ones with arrogance coming out of each of their orifice. It would give me an intense thrill to know they wanted me but deep down I knew they were not long term relationship types. I was hooked, I was hook on that 'thrilling feeling' and I had to ride it till I didn't need it anymore. I kept saying I was looking for a relationship but none of the men I chose reflected that.

 

It took me a couple of years to grow out of it.

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jessiesgurl

I dunno, at first I was inclined to say we like what we like, but if your relationships have been dysfunctional and hurtful, then yeah it’s smart to introspect and determine why it is you are drawn to men who offer you that.

 

How troubled are we talking about here though? Alcohol, drugs, emotional unavailability, criminality? If so, yeah NOT good or healthy at all.

 

I am not an expert on this but a qualified therapist would of course say it goes back to something in your childhood, but who knows.

 

Perhaps as a child you felt somewhat invisible and not needed, so as an adult you seek out relationships with troubled men who “need” you, whom you can “save.”

 

Have no idea I am just tossing that out as a possibility.

 

What I can relate to is being drawn to men with big personalities, with an “edge,” who challenge me, intellectually, emotionally and dare I say, even sexually.

 

Some would find THAT not “normal” but to me, normal is relative, defined however a couple wishes to define it for themselves, “their” normal.

 

In any event, I think it’s good you’re exploring this within yourself.

 

I am curious though why you think a RL with him would be “folly” and if that’s how you feel, why continue interacting with him at all?

 

THAT may be something worth exploring within yourself also.

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scooby-philly

Hi OP...

 

I can related a little bit to your plight. Not that I am attracted to a certain personality and cant break it. For me, it was not dating really in HS, College, amd most of my 20s.....self esteem issues, poor self image, not being encouraged to follow my dreams or even know what to do career wise....i settled for things includong women....simply because they said. And i dont mean necessarily the real crazy ones...though i did date a sociopath once...but more knowing after a while we werent really compatible on major issues. I realize now that I had a poor childhood amd didnt know i could have the life I wanted so I felt too attached early on and couldnt see the forest from the trees and realize i could habe it all and that i wasnt doing me or them a favor by staying around

 

Would love to hear more about you and your overall life, but I would agree that we can be conditioned to look for something in order to fill a hole or block pain or some other emotional or psychological reason though our gut knows it's wrong.

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I dunno, at first I was inclined to say we like what we like, but if your relationships have been dysfunctional and hurtful, then yeah it’s smart to introspect and determine why it is you are drawn to men who offer you that.

 

How troubled are we talking about here though? Alcohol, drugs, emotional unavailability, criminality? If so, yeah NOT good or healthy at all.

 

I am not an expert on this but a qualified therapist would of course say it goes back to something in your childhood, but who knows.

 

Perhaps as a child you felt somewhat invisible and not needed, so as an adult you seek out relationships with troubled men who “need” you, whom you can “save.”

 

Have no idea I am just tossing that out as a possibility.

 

What I can relate to is being drawn to men with big personalities, with an “edge,” who challenge me, intellectually, emotionally and dare I say, even sexually.

 

Some would find THAT not “normal” but to me, normal is relative, defined however a couple wishes to define it for themselves, “their” normal.

 

In any event, I think it’s good you’re exploring this within yourself.

 

I am curious though why you think a RL with him would be “folly” and if that’s how you feel, why continue interacting with him at all?

 

THAT may be something worth exploring within yourself also.

 

Ah yes, my last two RL were dysfunctional and toxic. With two quirky, artistic and very disordered men.

That's why I'm thinking it's definitely not worth liking what I like.

 

As a child I was spoiled (not by material means) and loved, especially by my mom who lived and breathed for me. My dad was not a perfect father figure and sometimes I didn't see him much, but I have very bright memories of him from my childhood. My parents were really far from bad, which, I feel, changed when I hit adulthood. But absolutely nothing wrong with my childhood, didn't even witness many fights between my parents. So I don't know...

 

Why a RL with this guy would be a mistake - he's emotionally unstable, mercurial, with a mean streak, not happy with his life and has no clue what he really wants to do. A woman left him because she couldn't bare his extreme mood swings.

As to why I still keep interacting with him - probably because I enjoy when someone reaches out to me so much. I thought that we could be friends, our families keep a friendly contact through several generations, so I thought it makes sense for us to get to know each other. But it has now grown into something very weird, especially from his side

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scooby-philly
Ah yes, my last two RL were dysfunctional and toxic. With two quirky, artistic and very disordered men.

That's why I'm thinking it's definitely not worth liking what I like.

 

As a child I was spoiled (not by material means) and loved, especially by my mom who lived and breathed for me. My dad was not a perfect father figure and sometimes I didn't see him much, but I have very bright memories of him from my childhood. My parents were really far from bad, which, I feel, changed when I hit adulthood. But absolutely nothing wrong with my childhood, didn't even witness many fights between my parents. So I don't know...

 

Why a RL with this guy would be a mistake - he's emotionally unstable, mercurial, with a mean streak, not happy with his life and has no clue what he really wants to do. A woman left him because she couldn't bare his extreme mood swings.

As to why I still keep interacting with him - probably because I enjoy when someone reaches out to me so much. I thought that we could be friends, our families keep a friendly contact through several generations, so I thought it makes sense for us to get to know each other. But it has now grown into something very weird, especially from his side

 

I think you might have said it there - he reached out. Dysfunction as an adult doesn't mean it was something your parents did/didn't do. And it's not always "toxic" either. I don't mean to speculate either - but look at what your said - you enjoy when someone reaches out so much. Perhaps there's a desire for male attention because your father wasn't around a lot. Perhaps you had a "loving" but lonely childhood. Keep on the path to more introspection. Don't be surprised if you keep digging that you find a real answer along the way, albeit it can be 2 days, 2 weeks, 2 years, 2 decades (hopefully not the last option).

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Haha , l love quirky, that odd one out. l've always been the odd one out, the black sheep and l love people like that, especially women.

In partying days l'd go for that one over in the corner or looking like she just wants to get the hell outa there and being single again now after my marriage broke up , or on my short fling on a date site, or in the divorce forum l was in after my marriage where l met gf, to this day it's always that odd one that to me will be the sainest- good , giveme her.

 

But honestly, they don't seem to have anymore problems or sh@t than anyone else. Most of the time they're actually smarter and see through the sheople bs everyone else falls for and one thing l really love , is that they're their own person.

Everyone has issues though and l'd say you'd probably find no matter who you went for there is crap, until you simply meet the right one.

 

But hey that's me but in my experience , ms perfect is the one you really gotta watch, as the saying goes, if it looks too good to be true it probably is.

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I am the same as you , Op.

 

I simply chose chemistry with a less than ideal man, over lesser chemistry, with a stable and responsible guy.

 

Although even I have limits. As long as he holds a full time job and/or is not long term unemployable and finds a job if he gets laid off..... (and isn't between jobs often)....

 

For me my choice means I don't have long term relationships. I seem to be happiest this way. Following my heart so happens to mean I have shorter term relationshipswhich is fine, as I expect it and know it is what I prefer, over long term relationships with less than white hot chemistry.

 

I found that when I tried to settle down with 7/10 chemistry, I wanted to cheat and wasn't happy. It felt like I was forcing and fighting to stay monogamous.

 

So either just accept short term things with the men you truly feel the hottest for and stay single for life as a choice. Or learn how to enjoy good chemistry with an ideal man whof you lack that tiny bit of intensity with.

 

Most women are happier with the latter.

 

I think you should just have the men you know are the best men for you a go, providing there is enough chemistry to want to sleep with them.

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People here can only guess at what may be lurking in your past that leads you to choose these relationships. Maybe it was your mostly absent father or maybe your mom was so intently focused on paying attention to you that you now equate a man intently focusing on you as love. Or maybe something else altogether. I would suggest therapy as a good therapist will help you get to the root.

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I don't think that it must have something to do with her past. Most people I've seen who go for the "crazy ones" are simply filling a void. They are lacking excitement in their lives and are getting it through romance.

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If anything , I guess at this point , just be alone for a while rather than having heartbreaks and sorting out other men's issues! Not worth it. Since it's a pattern, you really have to dig deeper.

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I don't see much correlation between 'quirky' and 'problematic', IMO. The two do not necessarily have to overlap - lots of people who appear 'normal' or 'conformant to society' on the surface would actually make terrible partners, and lots of 'quirky' people would make good partners. FTRs, the vast majority of men whom I've known to be bad partners (cheaters, wife abusers, constantly unemployed, uncaring, irresponsible, etc) appear to be rather "normal" on the surface. On the other hand, lots of guys who dress differently or have uncommon hobbies or who don't blindly conform to what society expects of them, can make pretty darn good partners.

 

So, I don't think there's any issue with liking 'quirky' per se (as long as it doesn't cloud your judgement) - the issue is that you like 'problematic' men. I'm not splitting hairs here, I genuinely think that understanding the difference will go a long way towards tackling your problem.

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How to become more attracted to normal, healthy men? Wish I knew.

 

I'm a magnet for messed up, troubled men, they spot me from the distance...and I hate to admit I'm attracted to them. Why? High compassion, high tolerance for weirdness and bulls**t, understanding, overprotectiveness, this great feeling that someone needs you... and it's so much fun to explore someone's head...at first.

 

I've been a shrink in almost every relationship I had, the strong one, a leader. I pretty much screwed up my life because of it. Those men become very needy and dependant, but no one will catch you when you fall.

Intensity can be highly addictive, are you sure you can come out clean?

 

I don't have any smart answers...I wish you good luck ;)

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The story you tell yourself about your choices matters.

 

You're currently paying attention to the negative qualities that the men in your life share.

 

Look at all the guys you have been attracted to in your life. What positive qualities do they have in common? What positive things have these men brought into your life?

 

While I was single most of my adult life, I firmly believe I have good taste in men. And like anything, good taste is something that takes intention and practice. The more you flex your "good taste" muscle, the easier it will be to walk away from the noise.

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I am the same as you , Op.

 

I simply chose chemistry with a less than ideal man, over lesser chemistry, with a stable and responsible guy.

 

Although even I have limits. As long as he holds a full time job and/or is not long term unemployable and finds a job if he gets laid off..... (and isn't between jobs often)....

 

For me my choice means I don't have long term relationships. I seem to be happiest this way. Following my heart so happens to mean I have shorter term relationshipswhich is fine, as I expect it and know it is what I prefer, over long term relationships with less than white hot chemistry.

 

I found that when I tried to settle down with 7/10 chemistry, I wanted to cheat and wasn't happy. It felt like I was forcing and fighting to stay monogamous.

 

So either just accept short term things with the men you truly feel the hottest for and stay single for life as a choice. Or learn how to enjoy good chemistry with an ideal man whof you lack that tiny bit of intensity with.

 

Most women are happier with the latter.

 

I think you should just have the men you know are the best men for you a go, providing there is enough chemistry to want to sleep with them.

 

I would like it to last, to be honest... But I know that's unrealistic, because something that starts off with huge intensity doesn't last for sure. I would be fine with it dwindling and reaching the normal levels further into the RL, but it always dies down to nothing.

 

Also, the short term thing isn't the only problem, at least in my case. Those men start disrespecting me as the adoration turns into belittling. Or maybe I just happened to date quirky men who also were narcissistic.

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I am the same as you , Op.

 

I simply chose chemistry with a less than ideal man, over lesser chemistry, with a stable and responsible guy.

 

Although even I have limits. As long as he holds a full time job and/or is not long term unemployable and finds a job if he gets laid off..... (and isn't between jobs often)....

 

For me my choice means I don't have long term relationships. I seem to be happiest this way. Following my heart so happens to mean I have shorter term relationshipswhich is fine, as I expect it and know it is what I prefer, over long term relationships with less than white hot chemistry.

 

I found that when I tried to settle down with 7/10 chemistry, I wanted to cheat and wasn't happy. It felt like I was forcing and fighting to stay monogamous.

 

So either just accept short term things with the men you truly feel the hottest for and stay single for life as a choice. Or learn how to enjoy good chemistry with an ideal man whof you lack that tiny bit of intensity with.

 

Most women are happier with the latter.

 

I think you should just have the men you know are the best men for you a go, providing there is enough chemistry to want to sleep with them.

 

 

I would like it to last, to be honest... But I know that's unrealistic, because something that starts off with huge intensity doesn't last for sure. I would be fine with it dwindling and reaching the normal levels further into the RL, but it always dies down to nothing.

 

Also, the short term thing isn't the only problem, at least in my case. Those men start disrespecting me as the adoration turns into belittling. Or maybe I just happened to date quirky men who also were narcissistic.

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I don't see much correlation between 'quirky' and 'problematic', IMO. The two do not necessarily have to overlap - lots of people who appear 'normal' or 'conformant to society' on the surface would actually make terrible partners, and lots of 'quirky' people would make good partners. FTRs, the vast majority of men whom I've known to be bad partners (cheaters, wife abusers, constantly unemployed, uncaring, irresponsible, etc) appear to be rather "normal" on the surface. On the other hand, lots of guys who dress differently or have uncommon hobbies or who don't blindly conform to what society expects of them, can make pretty darn good partners.

 

So, I don't think there's any issue with liking 'quirky' per se (as long as it doesn't cloud your judgement) - the issue is that you like 'problematic' men. I'm not splitting hairs here, I genuinely think that understanding the difference will go a long way towards tackling your problem.

 

Maybe because quirky always went with problematic in my experience. The men who had the qualities I found attractive also had some psychological disorder to go along with it.

 

But to help myself tackle the problem I must admit that I find it weirdly romantic when there are some obstacles on the way. Maybe, like some poster suggested, I just lack excitement in life. After all I'm a person with overactive imagination, an obsessive book reader and I live a lot through my fantasies.

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I would like it to last, to be honest... But I know that's unrealistic, because something that starts off with huge intensity doesn't last for sure. I would be fine with it dwindling and reaching the normal levels further into the RL, but it always dies down to nothing.

 

Also, the short term thing isn't the only problem, at least in my case. Those men start disrespecting me as the adoration turns into belittling. Or maybe I just happened to date quirky men who also were narcissistic.

 

My latest relationship has lasted nearly two years. But I didn't expect it to. He is a recovering addict after all. But children are not crucial for me to live the best version of my life so... me taking a gamble ended up working so far.

 

I am very happy with him. But as a deeply flawed and quirky girl myself, it took me meeting my match for the great spark thing to end up with emotional depth and a lasting relationship. I met my equal.

 

I think what worked for us was that we both have the innate sense to want to better ourselves AND we are not sociopaths nor are we narcissistic. We also happened to enjoy and want to have a life together enough to simply... do what needed to be done to move towards a happy and stable life.

 

I wouldn't recommend any normal woman to chase after the "I just knew " type of feelings and intensity. I met someone who was flawed in similar ways I was flawed. We were both a little behind in our life and wanted to move forward together.

 

I personally didn't feel the spark with men who already had all their sht together. Yet I didn't want a perpetually unemployed dude either. I found my equal and it triggered sparks because ... there was instability there alongside the chemistry. But enough maturity in us ...somewhere lol, to still chase after a normal stance live

 

I know women and men who fell head over heels for normal stable good characters. I am simply too unstable within myself to be that type of person. I do not start at the same level playing field as a totally normal secure woman who has my crap together.

 

Maybe you have sonwthing within yourself that makes you feel the deepest feelings for unavailable men. Maybe you are actually fine and are well capable of falling hard for the right sort of man. It is luck, after all. I just personally knew that I do require some instability since I am always going to be a little mentally unstable and I would bore of ... total perfection and stability.

 

You may not be the class of woman that I am when it comes to chemistry and relationships. You may well be capable of feeling the greatest attractions to great decent men and have not been lucky enough to meet your match yet. As I said, a lot of it comes down to luck. Don't assume you can ONLY be into bad guys.

 

Woman can actually fall hard for men they are not wildly into at the start, so try and take advantage of this divide between the sexes. Men in the other hand, either feel all do eyed and head over heels instantly or they never truly reach that madly in love stage.

 

Either which way you're made, be is the stable girl or the slightly instance girl like myself, if you want a lasting love then by all means try and let chemistry grow. Women really can go from moderate chemistry to white hot chemistry with the right men.

 

Try it. Woman really do fall in love differently. In absence of the instability or ideal chemistry, it can indeed grow for us ladies.

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I personally didn't feel the spark with men who already had all their sht together. Yet I didn't want a perpetually unemployed dude either. I found my equal and it triggered sparks because ... there was instability there alongside the chemistry. But enough maturity in us ...somewhere lol, to still chase after a normal stance live

 

I know women and men who fell head over heels for normal stable good characters. I am simply too unstable within myself to be that type of person. I do not start at the same level playing field as a totally normal secure woman who has my crap together.

 

Maybe you have sonwthing within yourself that makes you feel the deepest feelings for unavailable men. Maybe you are actually fine and are well capable of falling hard for the right sort of man. It is luck, after all. I just personally knew that I do require some instability since I am always going to be a little mentally unstable and I would bore of ... total perfection and stability.

 

 

This is something I can relate to. Probably I'm also way too unstable and don't have my shyt together, so a guy with an orderly, stable life would either bore me or not put up with me and my constant inner struggles. I feel I wouldn't be capable to relate to someone who didn't go through deep downfalls, emotional/financial problems and had a fairly happy life. Neither would they relate to me.

 

Not sure I have it in me to fall for a perfectly normal guy, even though my inner voice of reason tells me that's the way to break out of my pattern. After all, my latest relationships were far from anything I dreamed for myself.

 

I also feel like I truly lack excitement, romance and something to make my heart beat faster. It feels like flawed men give me those sort of feelings.

 

 

 

Like the guy I mentioned before - the intensity of our contact and his deeply problematic nature was truly giving me the butterflies. I thought that when we meet it will be instant sparks. But unfortunately (or maybe it's for my own best) I had to cut down the communication, since it was starting to take a toll on me and I started to lead myself on waaay too much. We're still gonna meet up, for the sake of our distant relation, but only as friends and I have made up my mind to not give into my weird illusions.

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Maybe you just like to watch disaster movies, but you don't actually want to live through a disaster? You haven't gone as far as marrying a quirky man. So your role is probably voyeuristic. But it's a high price to pay because this activity makes you unavailable to other men.

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I can relate. Especially when I was younger I was interested only in types on men that were unavailable, treated me badly, were abusive...

 

In my case I have a history of very disfunctional family that may explain it, but I haven't been able so far to find a therapist willing to discuss that. They all tell me, oh, you're highly functional, no point to return to the past :(

 

I'm recently out of a terrible relationship with many back and forths in the end and TBH I'm scared to death to start dating again. I usually find a BF very quickly, like the first or second guy that I go on date with, and so far my choices has been very poor...

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I'd like to start this thread by saying, that I have already learnt from my mistakes and past experiences, so I'm not gonna venture into another toxic relationship. I keep myself level.

 

But I think it will be far more efficient if I admitted those feelings that lurk inside of me - I only get attracted to really problematic, quirky, weird, troubled men. It gives me intense feelings to talk to someone who keeps me on edge. I'd like to know how to avoid that, because at this point I'd rather stay single for the rest of my life than get involved into another heartbreaking adventure. What is wrong with me though?

 

Let me give you an example of something that is kind of ongoing right now.

 

I started talking to this guy for about a month ago. He's a very distant relation, I think we share a common ancestor generations back. But somehow his family and mine still keep in touch. I met his parents once and they seem to have told this guy to contact me - which I thought was cool.

 

It started off really casually and I even invited him to visit me in my city. Now it has overgrown into a contact of an insane intensity. Like hours on phone and a lot of private conversations, with just hints of flirt, but nothing very serious. It seems like this person has huge emotional issues and despite the fact that he's got that quirky personality I'm usually so fond of, I know that getting involved with him would be a folly. I would be the biggest idiot on Earth.

 

But nevertheless I'm feeling this overwhelming excitement and attraction. This kind of intensity gives me butterflies and works like some kind of drug. Makes me think I'm also ridden by weird mental issues. I just can't help it. Normal men bore me. I don't know what went wrong in my life to be so drawn into unlikely men. Had pretty normal childhood, a couple of traumatic experiences in my early twenties, some minor anxiety issues, but that doesn't really explain everything.

Right now I'm pretty happy and calm and feeling stronger than ever. But still I can't just pretend I don't feel what I feel. My chemistry is on fire for that troubled man.

 

Well anyway, I know that I won't be foolish enough to date him, if it ever came to that, but I'd like to not feel this way about this kind of men. Anyone can relate? Or maybe someone who succeeded to fix their own attraction patterns? And don't suggest therapy please, it is impossible to get that here. Not even exaggerating.

 

How to become more attracted to normal, healthy men?

 

Very often a person, who themselves is struggling with emotional "issues", will seek someone with similar history so that they can turn their focus away from their own "issues". They want to help the other person rather than address their own needs.

 

How do you become more attracted to normal, healthy men? You gotta become more "normal" and healthy yourself first. You need more time to focus on just you.

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I usually find a BF very quickly, like the first or second guy that I go on date with, and so far my choices has been very poor...

 

Yeah, why?

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