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I got with an old high school crush


confusedaboutfuture

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confusedaboutfuture

So there's a girl I've had a long and miserable history with who started out as good friends but made turns for the worst when I wasn't ready to move on to the next level (she wanted me to be her first boyfriend). This was over 8 years ago.

 

She immediately started to spread rumors about me secretly which cost me many friends and ruined potential relationships during high school and my first year of college. She was always jealous and made nasty remarks about the girls I was with. What's stupid is the very few times I tried to talk to her (3 times) she never wanted to hear me out and never let me express myself to her and her grudge worsen over time.

 

Even after 6 years of no talking to her, it never helped. She would always glare at me and I've caught her multiple times staring at me. About 4 years ago, she disappeared and I met my current girlfriend who was awesome and almost forgot abut this girl. Despite finding out about all this crap, and her rumors about me boosting her popularity, for a few years I always wondered "What if" concerning her.. and it used to bug me a lot. I even wrote about how badly I felt turning her down after coming across some things about her online that made me realize how compatible we actually were on some site. Nonetheless I fell hard for my current girlfriend and totally forgot about the other girl.

 

Here's where things went bad. I transferred to another university and moved away from the old city where I thought the one girl was and where my current girlfriend currently lives in to advance further in my career. My girlfriend and I kept in touch despite living hundreds of miles apart and I ended up spotting the other girl at this university (different city same state). It appears that she also had a boyfriend and caught both her glaring at me and the guy giving me the look that he would beat me up if I came near her.

 

After a semester there, things looked good but took a turn for the worst. The other girl decided to finally talk to me after all these years and apologize for being stupid and asked me to have lunch with her to "catch up." I foolishly agreed and long story short when we met up, she confessed that she came across my old story about my guilt for turning her down and it resparked old feelings for her and one thing led to another and I slept with her. She was very good in bed but to my horror, I caught myself cheating and to make it even worse, she's newly married to the guy.

 

I just don't know what to do. Before I used to like her, but now things are just so confusing, and I'm completely disgusted with myself for cheating on a girl who's been with me through thick and thin and thus so far has been the best relationship I've been in. The other girl right now is talking about possibly starting a discrete affair and if things keep going well, she plans on leaving her husband for me, but I'm not sure if this is even what I want and I felt like I'm trapped in a hole that I dug. Please if anyone has any advice, give it to me.. I know I screwed up bad.

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You had a miserable history with this girl, who is now an adult woman, and one sexual encounter with her in which you were both cheating on others. You don't say that you and your current girlfriend are monogamous and exclusive, but it's implied when you say that you cheated.

 

Regarding the married woman, don't contact her again. If she contacts you, tell her that you can't see or speak with her again. If she contacts you after you've asked her not to, then ignore those messages, calls, whatever.

 

If you're committed to your girlfriend, keep your pants on and zipped around other women. If you're not committed to your girlfriend, tell her - end it.

 

It's that simple.

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SoThatHappened

Yep, pretty much what Telemachus said.

 

You have a great girl, so stay faithful to her.

 

Cut all ties with the married chick who has done nothing good in your life, and made it worse by cheating on her husband with you.

 

It really is pretty simple.

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