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Why is he being so awkward?


Mzing

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A month ago I was on holiday abroad and my uncle asked his relative to show me around the place. It was the best holiday ever.

 

My uncle mentioned Tom asked him if I was single or have a boyfriend, he's single as well. He said to my uncle that he likes me, would like to date me, but same time to take things slowly. Everyone, all the relatives were able to see an connection between Tom and I. I even met his parents briefly. Morning before my flight his mum woke up early to bake cakes and biscuits for me!

 

The thing is he never said anything to me, that he likes me, just to my uncle and my dad. He's perfect, both same age - early 20's. He can be a bit shy but he's so kind, caring and cheerful. Being around him made me so happy.

 

Since I've been back home we have been in touch through Whatsapp messaging. My uncle encouraged me to contact Tom first as due to his shyness he's not confident enough to contact me first. So, that's what I did, to one point where we were in contact everyday. However, it's been over a week and I haven't heard from him. I don't want to be the first one to make the first move again in case he finds me annoying! It's so hard due to his shyness if he's being awkward because he's shy or not like me anymore! What should I do?

 

Why hasn't he been in touch? Does he like me?

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Do you want nice man this guy is like that. Or do you want a man to be the leader more direct can handle things. This guy isn't so direct so you would have to do the leading in any relationship with him. So you just said it that you didn't want to be the one to call him. If I was you I would look for someone else and stop waiting on all your time and effort on this one guy. Your young still there are plenty of well groomed gentlemen just waiting to be with you. I say no this guy and you can clearly see he not really or ready for anything. The family might say what they want but it's your life not theirs. You see this guy is to afraid to make contact and your have to do all of the work. Weak man you need a confident man the leader type not the coward type.

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I would say that he is probably very inexperienced.

 

You are young, if you like him, there is nothing wrong with you taking the lead and encouraging things along... Many women in this age have to do just that.

 

Good luck to you.

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I would say he has a bit more maturing before he's good man material. It's not fun for most people to have to be the one to initiate everything and lead someone around by the nose to get them moving.

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Sad that he has anxiety, and well guys like him are like pulling teeth to do anything. He likes you sure, but he is a scaredy cat. You will always have to initiate. So you can take it or leave it

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He has no confidence. It's cute for a while, but it gets tedious as time goes on.

 

He won't own his voice and speak up for what he wants. I wouldn't expect to hear anything from him, unless you want to be the dominant one in this involvement and keep making the overtures.

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^ I can't agree with this more. I mean, it's fine at first, but then you realize they are never going to be the least bit adventurous, all they'll eat is chicken nuggets, and when you're camping at night, they won't go with you to pee to help scare the snakes off! They're useless! And they're usually scared of sex. Not a good long-term companion.

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Maybe his interest in you isn't as high as everyone wants you to believe. He now knows you like him too so shy or not he would step it up a bit.

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You posted the same thing a month ago.

It doesn't look like anything has changed on his end.

 

We can all speculate as to why he is acting the way he is but none of us know.

All we can see is that his behaviour seems uninterested.

This is what you should focus on, and move on.

Long distance sucks anyway.

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He lives in a different country, so you need to keep that in mind. Even if he likes you, is there really much potential? A lot of people wouldn't want to get to wrapped up in someone who lives far away.

 

I would probably just view this as a friendship and not expect much more. The logistics and his shyness don't bode well.

 

Also, remember that sometimes relatives get over-excited about matchmaking. They may have overestimated his interest because they hope it's a match, even if Tom himself didn't exactly say so. If he's a shy guy, I have a hard time imagining him coming right out on his own accord and telling people he would like to date you. I don't mean that as a knock to you OP, but I have seen this happen before: An excited family member asks Mr. X if they like their niece/cousin/granddaughter, Mr. X goes along with it to seem game and because why not, and suddenly the whole family is convinced Mr. X has the hots for the lady in question.

 

All I'm saying is, be wary of your family's opinions. They might indeed be right, or they might have got carried away. Let Tom's words and actions speak for him instead.

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